goodbye, my dear ( part 8 )

We had to celebrate. But Ms Woodley had a different kind of celebration in mind.

"Its been very long since the last time you went on stage," she said. "Not counting your school fest, obviously."

"Of course," I replied. "I wouldn't want to count that at all."

She was pleased.

"Good. Then its almost a full year. There's this event the city is hosting. A three day celebration. I'm sure you don't know, because you have the littlest interest in current affairs I have ever seen in anyone. Tonight's the first night. We could go. As audience. If you're interested, if you're inspired, I could arrange for you to go up the stage tomorrow."

Going up the stage. That would definitely be a celebration. She wanted it too. I nodded in agreement.

We dressed casually as we headed out. Ms Woodley said that even when she was at the peak of her career, she preferred dressing comfortably. If not for her music and her voice, she couldn't possibly be popular.

The city stadium was the venue. A stage was erected in the middle of the ground. Speakers powerful enough to fill the large stadium with the music stood tall on the four corners of the stage. Powerful lamps were put up so everyone could see the stage from all corners of the stadium. It was a truly grand setup.

The night was underway when we arrived. A member from the organizing committee, and a senior one at that from the way everyone was respectful of him, welcomed us. Ms Woodley, more accurately. I was lucky to enjoy the treatment as her student. He led us to where other artists were resting and preparing. Many recognized Ms Woodley, came over to exchange greetings. They looked at me curiously. Ms Woodley offered no explanation. I made no effort to address the attention.

Ms Woodley walked me the closest we could get to the stage without being a distraction. We were on the ground. I looked around and saw the large audience. All of them would be my audience when I went up the stage. For a moment, I felt the rush and the nerves. It was a feeling I was familiar with, even if I had never been on a stage that large or had an audience so huge. Maybe I really could be up on that stage.

The next moment, I was back on the stage of the school fest. I could feel the crack in me, even if I coulnd't understand. What I did know was that I couldn't go up that stage. I didn't want the lights focused on me. I didn't want all those eyes staring at me. It brought back the terrible memories, feelings buried far below that I didn't want dug up. I had to turn away.

"Can we go back home, please?"

Ms Woodley was looking at me all along. She saw the changes in my face. She was ready before I even asked.

"Yeah. Let's go. But not home. Come with me."

We walked back out, and went in through the gates for the audience. We found seats at the far back of the stadium, with no one near us. And from the dark seats, we saw the stage. We were just a member of the audience. It was so much more comfortable there.

We stayed to the end of the night. It was truly enjoyable. With a glance, we knew. We would be returning for the remaining two nights too, as audience.