Liu Qingmei's Past

"To answer your first question, you have no secret identity. You are a born citizen of Silvercross. Your dad, actually, I don't entirely know his history either. But the amount of pain I see in his eyes," Liu Qingmei sighed at this point. The amount of pain she had seen in her husband's eyes was truly tremendous and she had close to no idea what he had gone through, only that he didn't want to think about it ever, so she forced herself to never ask so he would never have to recall everything. "And yes, we actually did meet in college. As for what can injure when you are in the sleep domain..."

"Stop," Chen Xie interrupted.

"What is it?" Liu Qingmei asked.

"What about you mom," Chen Xie stared directly into his mother's eyes. "What have you been through?"

Liu Qingmei's body involuntarily shook. What did she feel with this marriage? Was she happy? Truly happy? These questions were the exact ones she would ask herself week after week. Chen Xie's father could always go to sleep for months without a worry, but her? She couldn't just sleep forever. She had to live, wide awake, everyday. And what do people do whilst awake anyway? They just collect regrets.

If she were to write about her regrets, they would fill enough pages to be considered a novel themselves. Even today she could still hear him cough. The heartache apparent in his eyes as he collapsed. He wasn't particularly fit, and would definitely be considered obese. But as a little girl she always felt safest hiding in his large arms. He was her father and when he heard she died, he had a heart attack. One that he did not live through.

In her grief of losing both her daughter and husband in the same day, her mother fell into extreme depression. Because of this Liu Qingmei had visited her mother once in the hospital. However, she had already undergone a permanent face change and had to pretend that meeting her mother was merely an accident. She had to pretend to be a stranger in front of her own parents, trying so hard to not break down from the pressure or the shame of having caused her own father's death.

Even when her best friend was sent on a suicidal mission without a partner strong enough to watch her back, Liu Qingmei could do nothing but watch the funeral from afar. After all this, could she still happily live her life? With all of her close relatives and friends suffering, yet her? Unable to do a thing out of the risk of revealing herself.

Yes, her husband had suffered as well. He had probably been suffering for his entire life, with herself being his only respite, but in order to become his caring wife, did she not make any sacrifices? Did she not suffer for him? These thoughts would frequently pop up in her mind. What had she not given for him? However she could truly not bring herself to leave him.

Maybe it was because they were a married couple and her family had always found divorce distasteful. Perhaps staying with him was a instinct of her blood at this point.

As she was lost in thoughts, she suddenly felt a warm embrace around her neck.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked mom," Chen Xie whispered. He was truly too frightened after seeing his mother, who would only rarely tear up, now unleash a flood of tears with the word pain scared onto her face.

Yes. This was why she stayed. It was no longer just because of her husband, it was because of her son. Chen Xie, her pride and joy. Although today he was grown, he would always remain her little boy. And for him, she could do anything. What did this little amount of pain matter? Her suffering was fine, as long as her boy could live with his head facing the sky. As long as she lived, no one would ever touch a hair of his head!

Wiping her tears away Liu Qingmei returned the hug while softly patting Chen Xie on his head.