RedCeiling

[Completed]:
Volume 1: Loss of a firm hold.

[Upcoming]:
Volume 2: Intertwined fingers.

[Excerpt]:
"I think I love you," I told him. The feeling of wanting to be with him for the rest of the time started the day he first visited me at the orphanage.

"You do, and I love you too." Then he walked nearer, "Promise me it'll be the two of us," he asked.

"Promise." 

But was that really possible? "I'm technically your sister," I said. We were old enough to understand certain things.

"Adopted." He stressed. "What I asked them was I wanted to you be with me forever. There will be no one to point on that," he said. Were things really that simple? But listening him say them was all I needed.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I found out that I was pregnant almost a fortnight ago and which woman does not be happy? I wanted to tell him first and I did. But the reaction he gave made me doubt my entire life. First it was a surprise and then, as I waited for his response, I watched his eyes become happy. But before he smiled, a very small and indecipherable frown appeared and he hugged me tight not giving me a chance to read his face anymore. His breathing was quick and heavy. After he released me, I took in the smile on his face; only, I didn't know if I should call it a smile. All there was in his eyes was a hue of sadness.

"What's wrong?" I questioned him directly. His face changed once again. He seemed troubled.

"Nothing," he smiled and added that he was happy.

"You're not," I stated. He is not a fool to think that I would not know when something is wrong. And he would be more wrong to think that I would let this slip.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Look at me.” I said calmly. He shifted his head but still avoided my eyes. I walked up to him and put my eyes in his line of sight.

“Don’t you know what I mean ‘every day’?”

He took a quick step back. “Jessie, what’s wrong? Why are you like this?” What’s wrong?

An ear piercing sound rang through the room. I slapped hard across the face. Then I noticed that I started crying. Through my blurry eyes, I saw his eyes tearing up too. This was yet another unpleasant first. The first time I was forced to slap him.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Are you okay?” I asked him lifting my head to see his face. His chin rested on my head and I still did not have a proper look. I tried to move my head slowly in another attempt, but he held me tight, not letting me move. Was he still crying? Perhaps that was why he did not like me seeing him.

When we were kids and something troubled him, he used to find me to let it out. Crying was included sometimes. He did not hide his tears back then. Because, boys did not particularly cry in front of their girls, I questioned him how he saw this once. It was a playful teasing that I aimed at. But, he gave me a serious and truthful confession in return. Mentally I am the stronger one and he told me that crying in front of me never felt like he was lowering himself. That was his level of acceptance.

But everything he is doing now is in a stark controversy to my beliefs.

He spoke after calming himself more, “I’m not.”

[Target Audience]:
This story has 3 volumes. From the name, it is not odd that this is totally based on love. The first volume is a little tragic, the reason why it is under realistic fiction. If tragic romance upsets you, then this might as well.

**[UNEDITED]**
I didn't proof read all the parts. But I usually keep an eye to check for mistakes as I write. So hopefully there are not too many of them. Will be editing soon.

Struggle Of Love

"What's special today? Why is he home so early?" mom asked with a gleeful expression. "You spoke to him?"


Over the dinner, she was not over the fact that her son was home so early and asked him, "Why, my good son, are home so early tonight?"


"Jessie was not happy with me being out for so long so I had to threaten the management to leave their hospital if they kept on burdening me. That is why; they let the other juniors handle things while I am here." Did he not say he was a 'rookie' today morning? Now, in twelve hours he is suddenly a senior.


Mom believed him easily, "You should have done that a long time ago!"


"I did. But this time, I showed them an offer letter from the capital." He did not tell them about that one year old offer until now. If they knew, they would be happy to the two of us settle in the capital. Because James and I, especially I did not want to go anywhere away from home, we decided against letting them know. It was an impressive achievement for a young surgeon to be called to the best hospital.


I only looked into my food as I ate calmly. He has really learnt to lie so smoothly with such clear eyes. Even an interrogator won't decipher the truth. Life turns out to really bitter sometimes. He can lie with a clear conscience.


"Wow! Then why are you even threatening them? You should just go to the capital!"


"They have more people like me there. The salary they proposed is not even as high as what I earn now. But here there are more who demand for me. Moreover, Jessie's work is best convenient here."


That was not a lie. Mom slowly nodded thinking about it. "Good decision. So from now on, you won't be over working at all. Isn't that true?"


"Thank god, they called for you just at the right time! Jessie was really worried about you," she said as she glanced at me to find my glaring eyes warning her not to continue. She stopped and James did not go further with her comment. He might have already had an idea that I was upset from the talk this morning. Whatever it was, the rest of the night was uneventful.


At night, while I was lying in his hug with my facing him, he asked me, "Jessie, are you alright? Let it out if you are sad." 


Everything still felt like I was teleported to another world. Somewhere at the back of my mind, in my psyche, there was a young woman. She looked like me. She was me and I was effectively ignoring her existence. She was a distant friend from a time that was left behind in the past. I had only met her once until now, when she was five years old. That time she was my nightmare. She would only say one thing. "They are not coming back." And she would repeat a million times if I looked at her. Not being able to bear her persistent torture, I defeated her voice telling myself, "My family is always with me."


Here she was again. I looked at her only because I sensed a presence. If I had any idea that it would be her, I would not have turned her way. However, this time, she did not say anything. She only looked at me and then turned to an uncertain direction. Just as I was about to follow her eyes, "Jessie?" James questioned me softly.


It was like a switch, I was back to the real world. When I heard him, I remembered his question. I did not know what to answer. He asked if I was sad. Was I? I did not know. But something has changed. With the world or with myself, I was not sure. I felt disconnected, numb.


More time passed and I still did not open my mouth. James hugged me tighter, "Sleep. Good night." He kissed my head and I fell into a deep sleep unknowingly.


Numb