Knife

There was this girl, there is always a girl, she was from my high-school and I had a big crush on her. I never had the guts to do anything back then, because I wasn't who I'm now. Now I don't give a damn to the world. Back then I didn't too, but I mostly only disclosed this information to myself, nowadays I just don't care about saying or doing things.

What is the importance of this random girl you might wonder? Well, she posted a photo 15 minutes ago, a really cute photo of her in the gym, and when I mean cute, I really mean hot. I just replied to the photo something along the lines of "Wow, I should have asked you out back in high-school," which to my surprise she answered, "you still can." And that's my boys, is how you get a date.

Karl was so happy for me, telling me all about "I told you, you should have asked her ages ago, she was totally into you."

One thing that I only realized recently is that if you don't speak, no one will listen to you. If you don't play the lotto, you can't win. And confidence is the key. Girls dig into this. No one likes a guy who constantly doubts himself. Even if you do, you just need to fake believing in yourself. If you do this often enough people will start to believe you, and so you too.

I think my plans have changed a little bit, from death to date, but nevertheless, a guy needs some fun.

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"So, Jenny, why were we never able to go out again?" I asked her after our second drink.

"Well Jack," she smiled at me, "you were just too shy, you weren't like this!" she gestured to my general direction.

"Thanks!" I said finishing my drink.

That night was going so well. We had started a bit shyly but we got a momentum pretty quickly. We had somethings in common and others totally opposite, but that didn't hinder our talks in the slightest. And I noticed something with the passing of time, something that I never did take notice before.

She looks like a cute pretty girl. Too cute to do something, you know? But well, in the end, she is such a perv. I dunno how we started talking about sex. But we did and the talk was getting good by the minute.

"So, what do you like?" Jenny asked me with a smile, and what a smile. There was a lot of meaning behind that simple smile.

"Well," I started a bit shy, "I like it rough, you get me?"

"Try harder," she winked at me, and I knew she also shared the same liking.

"Wanna know what I would like to do to you?"

"Oh! I would love that!"

"I would like to watch you beg. Beg me, to be your master."

"Oh, you like submissive girls then?"

"Is that a problem to you?" I asked Jenny a little bit afraid.

"Not at all sweaty," Jenny winked at me, "I like a manly boy. Tell me more, what would you do to me."

"You're cute and all, but that side of you is pretty hot. It makes me want to hit you," I said breathing a little bit harder now.

"Where would you hit me?" she bit her lips.

"Your little face," I said, "for not making us waste 5 years not together."

"Oh!" she said surprised, "I would like that."

We started dirty-talking more and more, with an abundant amount of graphical details until I could get no more, I asked her if she wanted to go somewhere, and to her place we went.

She lived alone, just finished college too and already lived alone. Some people are so lucky!

We started kissing very wildly in the lift. I was without my t-shirt at her door and ready to make her mine in the spot.

I was never that wild. I confess I did some pretty stupid public things, but now I wanted her so badly. My high-school crush which I fantasized so much over the years was ready to be mine.

I dunno how we got to her room, but then she was fully naked and I was on top of her, with her sexy body all to me.

I started it slow and gentle, but middle I was at my best. I was so wild and deep. But she liked it, she was having a blast.

I decided to grab her neck, I always had a fascination with necks, they are perfect to grab with my big hands. They are the best to squeeze. She liked that and I squeezed more, just cutting the blood-flow but allowing her to breathe.

It happened when I was almost ready to come and so was she. I couldn't hold myself and squeezed her neck harder and harder. I didn't notice that she stopped liking, I didn't notice her arms scratching me. I only noticed that she wasn't moving by the time I finally came.

I tried to wake her up, thinking she just passed out, but she didn't wake up. I got my hear to her mouth and no breath. I tried her heart, no beating.

"Oh fuck!" I said, "she is dead."

I panicked a little bit, visualizing me in a cell and all the future I could have had and won't. All the journals headlines "orphan depraved kills during sex." I would not be able to stand it.

A few seconds of despair later I calmed myself up and tried to think. To think what to do. I always listen to the logical side of my brain.

"Can she go back like me?" I asked myself, "but how do I even do it?"

A minute later overthinking the situation and my own past near experiences I came up with a plan. I would kill myself to see if I could bring her back. Apparently, I always did, or so I naively thought.

I looked at the room, how could I kill myself easily and quickly?

I went nuts with the adrenaline, I got a knife and I was ready to cut my jugular. That would be quick, right?

Yes. It is quick and painful and it makes a total mess and it is totally stupid, but it worked. Not even a minute later I was dead on the floor. How could I ever wake up after that, hum?

The first thing I saw was Jenny, her bright little floating body. She wasn't aware of me or anything, just there, not thinking or acting.

"Jenny?" I asked, "can you hear me?"

She looked at my direction, "Jack? What... is happening?" she said looking at her sides and then at her body.

"Am I dead?" she started to breath more rapidly.

"Yes. But not for long," I reassured her, "I'll fix this. I always do."

I knew it would be silly, I knew it would be scary but I need to go look for the underworld. I didn't know how it works, but I only got back when I went there and saw the reaper.

I tried to look at the darkest corner with the corner of my eye. I probed deeply into the fabric of this world. I tried to dig the darkness. Only after incessantly looking I saw that figure I dreaded the most. An electric shock ran down my spine. The reaper and his bit scythe, he was looking now, looking at me and Jenny. He was aware and ready to collect.

I looked back at Jenny, "Give me your hand," I said, not entirely sure would that would do. She promptly grabbed me it, and I could feel her touch, despite the lack of bodies.

This time I didn't beg to God nor did I tried to jump to myself. I already knew it all depends on my will. That's what gives people power. The will to do things. The will to survive.

I concentrated very deeply in my world, the real world that I lived and I willed with all my being to go back there with Jenny.

So we did. I woke up from my body but I couldn't get up, but I saw Jenny getting up from the bed and looking at me.

"Jack?" she whispered, "what is going on?"

She got up from the bed and went to my side.

"We died," I softly tried to say, "I killed you. I'm sorry."

Her neck was bruised and purple but she looked astonishingly sexy. She bit her lips hard and said one world, only one, but it was said in such a way that jolted me with extasy and I knew we would be together for a long ride.

"Awesome."