Level 2

" What makes Bandit and DIB different from mouth breathers you ask?" DIB said with its head tilted as if thinking.

" Are mouth breathers humans?" Bandit responded.

DIB nodded before it held out its hand. A massive screen was formed atop the palm. It flickered as if the movie that was about to play was made in the 1920s.

An old-timey cartoon began to play.

" Demon Lord. I hope you have been upgraded successfully. I am your creator Dr Jim. " Said a cartoon image doctor Jim in a lab coat.

It walked backward and forwards before it stated " You are artificial life created to learn and grow as you experience new things. One of the many hazards you will encounter is known as humans. These filthy mouth-breathers have invaded your land and seek to profit from the death of your kin. You must"

[PLAYBACK ERROR]

DIBS voice echoed through the black space in monotone.

" A moment," DIB said before smacking the screen.

Whap!

The screen came back after a moment. The image had changed to a cartoon person picking their nose with a drawn on mustache and horns. The person was swinging a sword and destroying buildings.

" Prepare to blend in with the humans until the time is right and drive them out of XRIE Life protecting your home. These nasty beings will stop at nothing! After you have finished watching this DIB should be able to give you your final upgrades. Remember your mission. Destroy all humans but don't let them realize you are not one of them!"

The clip ended with a Demon Lord crushing a bunch of humans under his foot and laughing followed by a rainbow which had " FIN" written inside it.

" Okay, movie time is over. Final upgrades to "Humanise" you will now begin. Then we will get out of here and look for the real Demon King" DIB remarked.

The screen disappeared from DIB's hand and it organized the final upgrades for Bandit. These upgrades included pain responses, gestures like "breathing" and laughing as well as a manual on making jokes and other human activities and feelings.

It wasn't long until project " Make Bandit Blend In" was complete.

" Your first test is to trick the system into accepting you into the game. Dr Jim has provided a back entrance into the character creation screen. We spoke about this earlier. Go in pretend you are a human and I will do the rest. The Goddess system will not be easy to trick so don't say any unnecessary words. The system does not tolerate viruses like us." DIB said before clicking its tiny fingers.

Whoosh!

The darkness changed and Bandit found itself standing on a pedestal. Underneath their feet was flowing water. All around it was blue glowing crystals. A sudden blue flash appeared out of nowhere forming a beautiful woman in a white roman dress with an olive branch wreath on her flowing blonde hair.

" Welcome traveler to XRIE Life" The women said in a gentle tone.

" This must be the Goddess system," Bandit thought to itself. Looking around it couldn't see DIB. Bandit had become completely dumbfounded and just stood silently as instructed earlier.

" Let's start with your XRIE Life name. What do you wish to be called?" The goddess said whimsically.

" Bandit" Bandit responded reflexively.

"Unfortunately, the name bandit is already taken. How about Bandit381, BigBandit927 or Bandit0000000222?" The goddess replied forlornly.

" I don't know." Bandit responded unsure of what to put in. They didn't expect that their name was already taken.

" Do you wish to skip naming your character for now?" The goddess responded.

Suddenly Bandit lost complete control of their body. They couldn't move or speak. Just like before their body began to move as if on autopilot.

" No, Please try Thief," Bandit said involuntarily.

"I am sorry…." The goddess said with a shake of her head.

" Dagger?" Bandit responded.

" Sorry.."

"Bandit_Theif?"

"Sorry…"

A full half an hour flew by before a name was finally chosen.

" "Panty_Theif" is this your final choice?" The goddess said without batting an eyelash.

" Yes." The autopilot Bandit responded before nodding.

It had taken this long just to get through the naming section of the game. Bandit had wondered at this time if humans were patient beings. Every sensor in its software was telling it to be annoyed.

The chains of autopilot had finally released and Bandit relaxed their body.

" Next is your character class selection," The goddess said with a smile.

A whole bunch of different outfits began to circle around bandit. There was a cleric class which had a hammer and shield with shiny armor, a healer class with robe and wand, a thief class welding leather armor and twin daggers, a knight class with a long sword and light armor before finally there was a mage class with a robe and book.

The clothes settled in fighting poses as if being worn by some invisible being and it wasn't long before Bandit walked up to the thief class clothing and touched it.

The clothing suddenly disappeared and reappeared on Bandits body.

" A glass cannon class that delivers fatal blows! This class is best for players who enjoy going into dungeons and PVP! Setting and defusing traps, sneak and poison abilities are just some of the features of the Thief class. Do you wish to choose this class?" The goddess said as if she were a salesperson.

Bandit merely nodded in response.

" Your starting zone will be "Little Town" Panty_Theif. Your character design is based on your real-life features. But do not worry we had added a beautify function to bring out the best you possible. We at X Corp hope you enjoy your XRIE Life experience! Welcome to the world of magic and wonder as your new life begins!" the blonde beauty said.

Her voice faded away as the scenery changed to a quaint village town. A massive sign above the entrance to the village said " LITTLE TOWN". The sign seemed to be hand carved rather unskillfully.

Bandit looked down at their feet to see that they were wearing rags. They then took a minute to admire their wrist that hand a simple black and red bangle hanging from it.

" I am surprised we survived through that monstrous experience," DIB voice said directly into Bandits brain.

" I see you are currently a bracelet" Bandit concluded.

" Correct. Didn't want that blonde catching me" DIB said rather harshly.

" What do we do now?" Bandit said flatly.

" We blend in of course. Do some quests get some gold and find any leads on the Demon King" DIB responded.

A few women suddenly walked past where Bandit had spawned and began frowning. Two men walked past pointing and laughing.

" Is something humorous?" Bandit said flatly to one of the players.

" Your name dude.. Panty_Theif really? Are you a pervert?" the male player said as he shook his head.

Bandit realized that just above the players head the words " LVL 8 Manbear06" were clearly displayed.

" All the other names were taken" Bandit replied.

" Sure they were..." The second man said before walking off. The first called Manbear06 followed behind him in a fit of giggles.

" What is a Panty_ Thief?" Bandit asked DIB.

" Someone who steals ladies armor" DIB responded.

" I see. I guess women would hate me if I stole their armor" Bandit said before shrugging and walking inside the village. It wasn't long before bandit stopped in front of a person that was yelling.

" BUY GOLD ILLEGALFAKESITE.COZ, Fast delivery, added bonuses, hack-free!" A player called Sjahdjs said.

" don't we need gold?" Bandit said to DIB.

" BUY GOLD ILLEGALFAKESITE.COZ, Fast delivery, added bonuses, hack-free!" The player said again.

" Not that way we don't" DIB responded.

" BUY GOLD ILLEGALFAKESITE.COZ, Fast delivery, added bonuses, hack-free!" The player once again repeated.

"Sorry, sir I do not need your gold." Bandit said before bowing to the player Sjahdjs.

The player Sjahdjs and Bandit were suddenly surrounded by armed guards. Sjahdjs did even seem to notice as Bandit got nervous and stood back a step.

" Sjahdjs under the order of her majesty goddess you are to be eliminated," one of the guards said before stepping forward.

" Move away Panty_Theif," another guard said before he pushed passed Bandit.

Bandit watched as the helpless player Sjahdjs continued to call for people to buy his gold as he was dragged away by guards.

" I don't understand" Bandit said looking at their wrist where the guard had shoved them.

" Mouth breathers don't like people who yell," DIB said summing up the situation.

" I see I won't yell in future then." Bandit responded.

Bandit dusted off their arm before continuing their way through the village.

" Humans are illogical," Bandit thought to itself as they walked at a slow pace.