Dumb And Dumber

"Verizon, I don't think we're on Earth anymore."

"Of course we aren't, we went through your portal thingy."

"I want to hit you."

"You want to hit on me?"

"HALT JUNIOR!

HOW DARE YOU SUDDENLY AND DRAMATICALLY DROP FROM THE SKY WITHOUT PAYING RESPECTS TO YOUR ELDERS?"

"What? Where is this extremely old voice coming from?" BIG TIDDY PRINCESS STATED CONFUSEDLY.

(I FORGOT TO TURN OFF CAPS BUT I LIKE THE WAY IT LOOKS)

"Down here, mortals!"

Alas, a mildly brain damaged rock was speaking to two mildly brain damaged characters in a mildly brain damaged world, oh wait, everything's normal nevermind.

"You delayed so long! I have been waiting here for about a month!"

"What? Didn't we spend like 2 minutes in the portal?"

"You idiot, it could be time dilation."

"Sure, princess. Your ass sure didn't get any bigger from the dilation though."

One inconsequential head injury later, a ragtag group consisting of a magical rock grandpa senpai, a foolish knight that is basically copyright infringement the anime, and a princess with the most boorish tsundere character made their way into town.

"Say magic rock grandpa senpai, what do you know of this world?"

"It's full of rocks. And bigger rocks, too."

"Aside from the obvious." Verizon chides.

"Uh that you'll want to use whatever valuables on you to buy food."

"Do you have weed on this world?"

"Excuse me, what?"

"Weed."

"Come again?"

"I said ***weed.*** That stuff makes me fly higher than a kite."

"There is a substance allowing for non-magus adventurers to fly? Amazing, I must tell the King immediately!"

"He was joking, magic grandpa rock senpai. Weed is a plant used for increasing your hunger and decreasing your ability to not make stupid comments."

"Hey don't blame that on the weed."

"Sorry you're just naturally dumb (hot)."

"What was that last part, BIG?"

"Uh nothing let's get back to the matter at hand." BIG TIDDY PRINCESS blushed furiously, seeing Verizon in his scantily clad armor.

"Excuse me Princess, my eyes are up here."

"What?"

"I'm not talking to you, BIG." Verizon said as BIG TIDDY PRINCESS suddenly noticed that they were at the adventurers guild counter.

"Thanks for all of the info rock magic grandpa senpai, I wouldn't have known to sell BIGs crown while she wasn't looking for some much needed food and an adventurers license."

"YOU F*CKING IDIOTTTTTTT!!!!"