When Was It?

After the woman left and the door was closed behind her, the entire room went back to its normal state, silent, without any ripple as if no one was occupying inside.

The man looked out the window again, but this time, the bustling streets didn't attract his attention anymore.

His feelings were very complicated.  

Bits and bits if his memories came to life once again, reliving the times when he was still a young kid.

He was involved in a crime he wasn't even aware to. His innocence was corrupted from then on. 

He wasn't aware that he was being used to fulfill a dream of someone not until he hot the position as a head of Chen Family.

Yes, his father was an ambitious man but couldn't compete with his other brothers thus he could only push his only son towards the fierce competition. 

It was fine for him since he also had a goal after getting that position. 

He wanted to get closer to the light he saw during his dark moments. He wanted to firmly held it in his hands and not to let go. But on the other side, he also wanted its fleeting moments to continue lighting his way. 

Regardless of the path he was taking, he would always glace if the light was still there. 

He waited for the right moment to capture the light. He wanted it when it was on its best.

Unfortunately, it was snatched away when he least expected it.

The light was captured by someone he thought he could defeat if he would fight for it.

But he was wrong.

His plan crumpled little by little. Things started to go awry. 

Madam Bai at that time was like a life saving buoy in the middle of the ocean, even though he didn't know its origin and why it was there, he grabbed and held into it. Hoping it could save him and his dream.

Again, it was probably a mistake. 

But... was it really a mistake?

Didn't he somewhat feel his coming defeat?

When was it?

When did he first feel that the light he's been chasing and considered ethereal became a bit different? It was as if a single path from the start and then slowly diverging.

When did his expectations started to disappoint him?

The perfect image of Han Meixiu that he created on his mind started to deviate from the original person.

But he still persisted and told himself that as long as she would stay with him, in time, she will become what he imagined her to be.

If only things followed the way he expected them to be. 

But they didn't.

Was it when he first saw her with Liu Zijian when he felt the crisis was getting inevitable?

Or was it when he purposely erased her memory for him to have a place in her heart?

But he could clearly feel that time, Han Meixiu was stiff and reserved. There was a subtle rejection even without her memories. It wasn't supposed to be that way.

Did he already started to falter from his conviction to take her by his side at that time?

What about when he was sitting with Liu Zijian when he was betting all he had even though his chance of winning was close to zero?

Didn't he feel their vast difference? 

He actually didn't wish to wake up again after drinking that drugged liquid. He wanted to remain dreaming since his dream was getting more and more different from reality. 

Who would have thought he still opened his eyes. 

He believed that Madam Bai saved him in the end to fulfill the part of the deal. But again, he was wrong. 

He already accepted his faith. He would suffer a cycle of torturous moments for the things he did. Every time he's on the brink of death, the process would stop. Then it would start again. 

The entire punishment he was receiving wasn't limited to only physical pain. He was attacked emotionally and psychologically as well. 

He didn't know when he started to feel numb from everything. His heart remained cold and there were no longer reaction from his eyes every time he would see Han Meixiu on the screen. Looking gloriously happy with someone else. 

That woman wasn't the Han Meixiu he knew. She wasn't the same person he believed as his light. He just wanted to stuck himself from the past. The time when she was still as innocent and untainted as a goddess. 

It was better that way. He could accept that Han Meixiu in his memory would always be the guiding light that helped him. Not now. 

Definitely not the woman who would smile gleefully to another man.

That was it. The woman he wanted was someone uncorrupted. Not the one who was married to someone else. 

After finally letting go of his dreams, he wanted to rebuild his life. 

It didn't even long before he was able to stabilize himself, his identity was killed. And the Chen Family, like what he more or less expected was as heartless as it used to be. 

How funny, seeing those people superficially wept. He knew better than anyone that they would rejoice after they wuld go back to hteir own respective residences. It was because he no longer suppress them. 

His father? Oh, his good father who used him since he couldn't fulfill his own dreams. He wanted his only son to live the way he wanted to. He wanted to sit on the pedestal because his son was the Chen Family' head.

He was the first person who deceived him and smilingly dragged him to comit a crime when he was just a kid. Of course, he learned about this later on. 

With him gone, Chen Wujing would be back to where he would before. A background. Almost non existent.

Without a title on his head, Chen Dewei wouldn't receive a second look from those people. 

That was basically his role in this world. 

Nobody would eventually pay attention to him if he had nothing. Nobody would probably care genuinely even if he would hurt himself. 

Nobody.

Until he heard what Madam Bai said. 

The TV inside the room suddenly turned on. Chen Dewei knew that he was being monitored and the appliances around were centrally controlled, just like that television.

At first, he didn't pay attention to was showing as he only glance quickly and moved his gaze outside the window again. 

But he heard Madam Bai's voice.

"Aren't you curious who saved and how did that person do it?"

Chen Dewei looked at the monitoring camera in his room before looking at the TV again. 

"I used a new device to record what happened. You should be thankful. Although it wasn't perfect as it could record only few minutes, if was able to capture a good show."

The man lowered his eyes, he didn't want to see. Simply because he didn't want to believe. But after a while he lifted his eyes and watched blankly.

The video didn't have a sound. The quality was not that good. Probably because the lighting was bad to begin with, he only saw himself lying on the bed unconscious. 

What happened after made him closed his eyes and calmed the surging emotions he has. He didn't need to continue to watch. 

'That foolish woman!' He smiled bitterly. 

"Where is she?"

There was no answer. Thus he asked again. This time around he was already shouting.

"Where is she?!?!"

"You think she's still alive after that?"

It was his turn to be speechless. 

Is he going to lose her, too? He just found someone who valued him despite his unfair treatment. 

Why is this life seems too unfair?

No, he couldn't simply accept it. 

Compared to the dream he created to save himself, that person was real. 

"You wouldn't show it to me if she's already dead." He answered as his heart was beating fast, hoping he's right. He didn't want to believe that Madam Bai did this only to torment him again. This time, the emotional blow might be really severe if the woman is dead. 

He might really go insane. 

"As expected." Madam Bai answered. "Do you want to see her?"

"Yes." The man quickly answered. 

*

Inside the spacious office, Zhang Huiling just turned off the monitor she was using to watch Chen Dewei. 

She called Bo Lin come in. 

"How's the patient I'm asking you to monitor?"

"She's been stable. The Doctor was also well behaved the past few months."

"Tell them I will visit tomorrow."

"Yes." After Bo Lin left, Zhang Huiling was again left alone in the entire office as she pondered about the man.

After realizing that Chen Dewei was indeed used without being aware of it, she planned to release the man. But she was hesitant to let a person with potential go. 

For the past few months, it became clear to her that the man could be used as a good asset of black.com. Her  only problem was how to convince him to work for her. 

She tried to test the water when she visited him earlier. If he would act based from her expectations, then there's a way to rope him in. 

And so far, the response was considerably good. 

Her lips perked up, showing how pleased she was. 

Although there was a time she felt she went overboard with her punishment, he still was involved in her parents death, thus it was acceptable. 

She's not worried that he would target her baby again? 

No.

A man like Chen Dewei, when they give up, it's the end. They would not look back. 

Time and time again, she tried to ignite his desire but she only saw an empty reaction and resigned face. 

It was as if her baby wasn't someone he coveted for a long time. 

There's still plenty of time to observe the man. She would never let him out of her clutch that easily. 

She looked at her table and saw the invitation for her grandchildren's 100th day.

What a pity, she couldn't attend this kind of celebration. 

These days it would be better to remain low key and observed from a distance. She could visit those two little angels anytime during night time anyway.

She picked up the invitation with intricate design and opened it. She smiled after seeing those innocent cuties placed side by side. 

The most heartwarming part of the picture was the twins hands clasping each other's. It might be arranged by the photographer but who cared? It was extremely pleasing to her eyes.