Chapter 48 - Looking up

"This is kinda sus, and why do I gotta be sus with Stryder." Zack whined.

He leaned back in his chair and held out the yin half of the necklace. He turned it over in his hands with a disgusted look.

"Come on Zack be nice. Annual put a lot of thought into this." I grumbled.

"Zack please, I just want you both to have something. Something that reminds you both of each other." She mumbled as she looked down into her lap. "I just think you two can do anything together. I wanted something to remind you both of that."

Zack's eyes grew wide as he looked over to her. He lowered the necklace and leaned over to her, resting his hand on her head. He smiled and ruffled her hair.

"Don't go pretending like we're not a trio here. We gotta Annual this up a bit. Cuz the last thing I want to think about is shield boy over here everytime I look at this."

"I can agree, I know I said the cord is enough to remind us of you. But maybe we can add another small charm to this or something?" I suggested.

Annual slowly looked up, her bold green eyes stared at Zack in a bit of awe.

"Come on, let's go buy some charm bracelets with some flowers on them. I'm sure we can rip those off and addem on to it."

"Not a bad idea." I hummed.

I lifted my burger up and took a bite. Watching the wholesome family moment. Zack really had been maturing lately. And from the look in Annuals eyes, I'm sure she could notice.

"Or maybe I should go buy a Gnome charm?" Zack snickered.

"Or maybe I should have gotten Stryder a trash can to remember you by." She hummed sweetly.

And there it goes...

"Spoken like a true Gnome."

"Says the guy with goblin breath."

"Says the Hippie who has lettuce stuck in her yellow teeth."

"You shih tzu haired Gremlin!"

"You flower snorting Gnome!"

And just like that, those two were yelling at each other again, in the middle of the food court. I slowly slumped down into my seat as all eyes quickly turned over to us. Great..

…

"Stryder you don't have to do this, I can talk to him ya know?" Lux whispered.

"No, Lux this is, this is something I have to do."

I turned to her and gave her a smile. I held out the keys to her and she hesitantly took them from me.

"Just go to the new place with Zack and Annual. I'll catch up with you later. Besides I left Zack alone in my new room. I rather him not prank me." I chuckled.

"Stryder, I'm serious," She huffed.

"And so am I. I don't want to be scared of him my whole life. So I'm gonna face him now."

She moved a hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eyes. I could see the worry that resided in her deep blue eyes. But, I just returned her worried look with a smile. I moved my hand over hers. My heart was racing, and my hands were trembling. And I was sure she could tell how scared I really was.

"Hey Lux, I think I got a little taller." I hummed.

Her eyes got a bit wide, she opened her mouth like she was gonna say something. But all she did was stare at me. Soon morphing her lips into a smile.

"To think, in the blink of an eye you become such a man." She whispered.

I smiled and took a step away from her, my eyes scanning over the old worn down place. The place I've called home for years. No more waiting, no more staying in my comfort zone. I was gonna change, I'm gonna become someone like him. Jack's face came into my mind. Even with my body shaking, even with my heart pounding to pop out of my chest. I was gonna keep moving forward. I turned from Lux and started toward my father's door. But I was quickly stopped as I felt a hand firmly land on my shoulder. I turned around and I met Lux's stern eyes.

"I'll be outside waiting on you. Just because you're a little taller now doesn't change that I'm your big sis. I'll let you handle this, but I'm gonna be right here for you when you're done. I'm not gonna let you shoulder any more pain by yourself. You understand?"

I smiled, I could even feel my shaking body ease up.

"I love you, Lux, I appreciate it." I hummed.

"I love you two knucklehead, now go." She slowly moved her arm off of me and walked off to the door.

I watched her go for a bit, and then I took a breath. I reached up and grabbed the yang necklace. I looked down to it and saw the symbol and the small blue flower. I felt this strength surge through me. Lux, Zack, and Annual. They were all with me right now. I can do this.

I walked to his door, and I knocked on it. I took a breath and I felt my heart race as I heard him groan. His disheveled steps echoed throughout his room as he got up. I stared down at the floor as I heard him getting closer and closer. Soon he was right in front of the door. It was like I could hear my heart right in my ear. A chill washed over me as his steps stopped, and the door slowly creaked open. Then It was like I forgot how to breathe. I held my breath as the door fully opened up to me, and it was like I was paralyzed.

I heard his low growl in front of me.

"Don't talk to me trash." He grumbled as he quickly went to shut his door.

"I know it's easy to stay in your comfort zone." I heard Jack's words echo in my mind.

I bit down hard on my lip, I could even taste the blood in my mouth. I grabbed the door as he went to shut it. I held it open against him and I looked up. I hadn't even realized it. But I was almost his height now too. It was crazy, just a minute ago, it felt like I was just a kid. But now, I felt like I was a man.

"I-I have something to say. And I'm not shutting the door till you listen to me."

"What did you say to me you little-"

I went into my hoodie pocket and grabbed the thick stack of cash I had. Before he could finish, I held up the money to his face. And then I let it all fall from my hands, and rain down onto his feet.

"I'm moving out, as of today I don't live here anymore. And this should be compensation for all the years you had to put up with me."

His mouth hung open, he had a mix of shock and rage on his face. My heart was still racing, but the pain on my lip kept me focused. No holding back, no giving in. His eyes eventually settled on mine. I could find the gleam of disgust residing in his amber pupils.

"You think this money can replace what you did? You'll always be the parasite that killed Serena! No amount of money is gonna-!"

I growled and balled my fist.

"My mother loved me," I said firmly as I glared into his eyes. "I am not a curse, and I am not the event. And if you can't see past that, that's your problem. For my entire life, I lived like I was a mistake because of you. And I'm done hating myself. My number is amongst the bills. If you can ever look ahead from the past. You can call me, and I'll love to talk." I let go of the door and took a step back. "Now you can shut your door, I'm done."

I turned around and grabbed the duffle bag on the floor, and started to walk to the door.

"Who do you think you are!?" He roared. "She would be alive today if it wasn't for you! How dare you pretend like you had nothing-"

"I never said it wasn't my fault, I just said I'm done hating myself for it. She'd want me to move on with my life. So that's exactly what I'm going to do." I stopped at the door and turned back to him. "And honestly, I think mom would want you to do the same."

I looked into his eyes. He looked shocked, no he looked completely devastated. He growled and reached into his room.

"How dare you talk like you knew her!" He screamed.

He pulled out an empty beer bottle and threw it at me. I stepped to the side and let the glass smash against the wall. He grabbed another and some of the cash on the ground and started throwing everything at me. Yelling every curse word in the book. But I just watched him yell and throw my money around. After yelling for a bit, he charged at me. I relaxed though. As he came in for a punch, I grabbed his arm and kneeled down. Then I turned and flipped him over my shoulder, and slammed him into the ground. He cried as he landed like a baby. Yelling over and over about calling the cops. And for a moment there, I just watched him. His little baby tantrum. The flip didn't even feel good.

I just pitied the guy, was this what I was like? Crying in my own self pity?

I decided to leave him like that. I headed to the door and I walked out. I could see my sister pacing back and forth outside. As soon as she laid eyes on me, she ran over and hugged me.

"I heard him screaming and loud noises! Are you okay!? Did everything end alright!?" She cried.

"Yeah, calm down, calm down." I chuckled. "Everythings all good. Let's just walk home."

She looked me over and took a breath.

"Right, let's do it." She chirped.

I gave the old place one last look. Before I turned around and started to walk away. Lux didn't walk immediately. I looked back at her and I could see her staring at the place. It wasn't long before she hurried over to me.

"Lux, you didn't have to come along if you weren't ready yet," I mumbled as she got close.

"Yeah right, like you can get rid of me that easily. We've got some good memories in that place. But I'm sure we can make much better ones in this new one. So how did dad take it."

"Hhhmm." I tapped my chin. "As well as I'd imagine he'd taken it."

"So not well at all?" She sighed.

"Precisely, I even flipped him."

Lux stopped dead in her tracks.

"Wait, you what!?"

I chuckled and scratched the back of my head.

"Oh yeah, he came at me and I kind of flipped him."

Lux just stared at me. She seemed dumbfounded. Not a word came out of her mouth. She just stared.

"Something wrong?" I hesitantly asked.

She soon smiled and shook her head.

"No, it's nothing really. Just taking in the fact that you're really as tall as me." She hummed.

"Yeah, better watch out. Give it a year or two and I'll be as tall as your boyfriend!" I chuckled.

Lux rolled her eyes and walked over to me. .

"Ppffft he wishes."