The Dragon's Gate
Author: LittleKoi
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Synopsis
In ancient times, an old martial art expert attempted to escape from death, even though he did not have enemies who could threaten his life, his longevity was drawing to a close.
Despite all his efforts, he ended up disappearing letting behind him a small village, sealed off to the outside world, to guard the last place where he tried to go against the heavens to prolong his life.
Several hundred years later, a young daydreamer and clumsy boy from the village, named Xiao Yu started his path on cultivation without real motivation.
What would happen if accidently that lazy boy had to share his body with this old expert, and the only way for him to get it back would be to work hard and surpass everyone to become an Immortal?
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Welp! Author ur story is qiluite well written and from the way u see it, there are no grammatical or sentence mistakes. All I would like to point out is the quotation marks. << >>. Frankly I like it. Good for a difference. At the end of all of it, I would like to ask. What is a psychic array? No, its not like I don't know but don't u think its kinda weird to mention it right at the first chapter. Leave the reason blank for now and explain it later to the readers. As for the story, I have a good feeling about it.
Well, this will be a little difficult to leave a proper review and rating since it's the first chapter, but so far the story has potential to be great and your writing style is easy to understand. I'm not really a fan of the whole cultivation stuff but I understood what you meant about Qi and everything else. I'm looking forward to see how this story will develop.
Thank you if you come here, please help me improve my writing, I am french so I dont know if my translation is acceptable or if I should ask someone else tell me if you can. About the story I have a lot of idea for the development, if you have ideas, if you enjoy my first chapter or if you dislike it dont hesitate to tell. Thank you again.
So far, I like it. It's certainly interesting. Only regret is that there are five chapters. There are minor typos but that's bound to happen to every writer. I'm intrigued by the concept of the Dragon Gate. The slight perverse narrations and fluff make it better. Not to forget, the descriptions are very well written. I finished reading too soon. Hope for more chapters.
Reveal Spoiler
Dragon's door is a cultivation based story, that depicts the life of a man trying to fight against death despite being on the path of cultivation. He tries every means possible to escape the hands of death, is there anyone that can go against their fate? On the other hand is a young character who doesn't want to study and walk the path of enlightenment, thereby raising the ire of his teacher. Just a few minor typos, but the story is very engaging.
I saw your post on the forum and decided to give your novel a try. It has potential but it still has one chapter uploaded so I can't comment much about the stability of updates or the story development. Your writing can be understood. Although you might have forgotten putting a period on some sentences like I also do when I type fast. How about replacing the sign << when a character is saying something >> with "like this?" It's much easier to read that way. It's just a suggestion, so don't be angry at me, okay? Much Love! <3
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