055 The bitter ugly truth

Huang Jin scratched his neck, looking down. He new that his mother was right. He did intend to torture Fei Shuang, to make her his completely. But now, he realized that seeing Fei Shuang all teared up was something his heart couldn't take. He could never hurt her as he imagined in his head. He admitted that he felt a wave of guilt whenever he remembered her.

He wanted to explain to his mother how sorry he was.

'I'm sorry mother, If only I could turn back time -"

"Turn my a**!" Yang Mi yelled. "I'm tired of cleaning up your mess all the time. You'll be leaving for Japan tomorrow morning."

"But mother-"

"No buts Huang Jin, you're leaving and that's final!"

Seeing her determined to send him away, a naniacal laugh suddenly burst out of Haung Jin. It started as a slight tremble in his chest that grew into a large, heaving laugh. As he laughed, he managed to spit out. "You really are going to send me away like you always did? I thought you may have changed after all these years, but I can see that you haven't. Let's hope your bast*** of a husband won't follow me again."

"He's your father.."

"That bas***d can never be my father. A father would never... Fine."

After hearing him speak, Yang Mi paused for a moment- just a brief moment- before she looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"I think you're just too blind to have noticed," Huang Jin blurted. "How he molested me."

"How?" she asked, eyes wide with disbelief.

Tears were pricking at the corner of his eyes as he continued, "Do you remember when I was Six, I had some red stains on my pants during Anna's birthday? That was the day it all started. You said it was wine ha ha ha, I don't need to tell you the details!" His heart started beating as if it couldn't hold back the pain anymore. He continued, "While you were on your business trips and every child at my age was at school, I was in this dirty f* house with your husband's d*** in my mouth!"

The end of his words left Yang Mi speechless.

She couldn't believe her ears. Did this all happen right under her nose?

She just froze there, recalling the past. From the birthday party,to the first fight Huang Jin had in school, how he started having difficulty concentrating and learning, how he was emotionally distressed, wetting in bed, always angry and why her husband was so attached to him, backing him up all the time.

She never suspected anything like that at all.

She thought her husband loved her son.

It was all her fault.

"Jin er, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. It's all mother's fault. If only I didn't travel much and spent more time with you..if only I didn't pursued my business career, all of this wouldn't have happened. Mother is at fault, I promise to make things right..."

"Heh, make things right, it's too late for that. As a child, I was convinced by him that it was our little secret so I didn't tell you directly. You should've noticed when I dropped you hints and clues that the abuse was happening without revealing it outright.

You should've noticed when I developed soreness in my anal areas, suffered from depression, anxiety, PTSD, using drugs and the number of times I tried to commit suicide. But, you always put your job before family. "

Yang Mi remained silent, lips pressed into a thin line as he concluded with how he wanted to stay far away from the two of them.

Sniffling, he faced her again. "But you never did... you called me a rapist mom, but what does that make you?"

Yang Mi couldn't help but finally burst into tears. How could she even call herself his mother after hearing the bitter ugly truth?

Tears. Tears were the only thing that kept flowing from her eyes. Her whole body was trembling and she couldn't stop Huang Jin from leaving the room. How could this all happen?

How? Why?