21. When my World Collapsed

"It's alright Noe. Everything is alright."

I heard someone saying it above me. But I didn't react. The sigh of naked Barton and his hand near my face was still with me.

~he wanted to brainwash me... am I the same? do I also take advantage of people and change them into my bitches? am I wrong?~

My mind was a mess, I thought that I would go crazy. But then I felt something hot touching my forehead.

I looked up and I saw Leo kissing me.

When he realized that he had my attention he said.

"Don't worry, little one. Everything is all right. Stop thinking about unnecessary things."

~unnecesery? this disgust, fear, distrust that people used to look at Barton... it could be me, I could be lying there instead of him~

Leo had to realize that I went somewhere with my thoughts as he said to me.

" Noe, dear, come back to me. Don't overthink it. Everything is alright. You just have to relax and be yourself. What do you want to do? We can do it."

"Can I go to my room and read a book? I want to be by myself."

"Of course, you can. Just let me grab a microphone. If you need anything just tell me, I will come right away." I was still in his arms when he took me to the cellar, grabbed the microphone, and passed it to me. After it, he took me to the room and left only after he made sure I was in bed with a book in my hands.

From the window, I could see him training.

Whenever he turned his head to look at the window of my room, which he did almost every minute, I waved my hand at him.

There was even a moment when I went into the toilet and after I came back he was in the room worried.

I found it sweet, but later I thought that those are not his real feelings. I made him like this. Which made me feel even worse.

When the dinner came Leo mentioned that he wants me to make it possible to have both, the speaker and microphone work in two ways.

I don't know why I have not thought about it earlier, but I was not in the mood to do it that day.

I just said I will do it later and went back to my room. Leo was still training. I thought he felt guilty or blamed himself for what happened. But it didn't. Couldn't.

When I thought about it later, I forgot that my skill Mind Master makes it impossible for me to get any abnormal status on my mind. So Barton couldn't possibly brainwash me. But it would give other people reason to question me, why I had a hidden skill.

For the late supper, Leo had to drag me from the bed, saying that it's not healthy to be hungry. We ate in silence. As we were about to finish, Leo asked.

"Do you want to message me today, or you would rather not?"

That was a good question.

~let's finish what I started~

I decided to complete my brainwashing on Leo, by giving him a trigger word. I was desperate to have someone on my side and he was my best choice.

"Okay. Let's go." I stood up and went to his room. I heard his steps behind me so I knew he follows me.

"Undress and lie on the bed." I surprised myself when I said it, with a slightly commanding tone.

He probably also realized it. He looked worriedly at me and said.

"Maybe it's not the best time to..."

"No, this is the best time. I have to put my mind on something else." I wanted to have it already behind me.

"If you say so." He started to undress.

The beginning was like every other.

When I hit the point of hypnotic trance I thought.

~there is no turning back [Brainwash]~

{ skill [Brainwash] used. Target resisted skill [Brainwash], cancelling skill, target cancelled [Hypnotic Trance]}

When I saw this message, I almost fainted. I turned around and started running. I didn't know where I wanted to run, but it would probably be out of the city, if not for strong arms catching me from behind.

~he will kill me! I am about to get killed!~

I started trashing and kicking where I could shouting to let me go.

"I am not letting you go." was all I heard. I bit him until I tasted blood, but he still didn't open his arms. He even made them tighter around me. As I was in them, he started shaking me. I thought he will break my neck, but instead, he kept repeating.

"Shhh, it's alright, everything is alright. You are safe. Shh, it's all right." It was then I realized, he was not shaking, but rocking me. I let my teeth go of his arms, licked his wound a little, feeling guilty about it, and stopped thrashing. Instead, I rolled myself into the ball, trying to appear as small as possible. Maybe just maybe, he will take pity on me and won't let me die. When he saw that I calmed down a little he took me to my bed and sat there with me, still keeping me secure in his arms. He kept calming me down, kept repeating that I was all right, safe. That nothing was going to happen. I wanted to believe him, but I knew that those were just empty words. Everything changed.

My whole world collapsed on me. I knew nothing will be the same after it. I just hoped that I could stay alive. When I had the darkest thought running in my mind, he spoke in the same soothing voice.

"I think we have to talk, don't we?" ~how can you smile? How can you be so nice to me... Ahh, yes I made you like this~ I dropped my head down in shame and guilt, but still answered his question quietly.

"I think we do."