chapter 36

Castiel P.O.V.

Heavy.

Why is it that there is something heavy in my stomach?

As I opened my eyes ever so slightly I saw a white ball with many teeth looking straight at me with a promise of death and suffering.

I closed my eyes and started praying to God to please don't let them realize that I am awake, no amount of courage is enough to face an angry girlfriend that happens to have a pet that can (and wants) to eat you alive.

"Why are you pretending to go back to sleep? Are you that tired of me that after a night with another girl you do not even want to see my face?" was what Seryu said with a glare that would make most men piss their pants.

I immediately jumped out of the floor and bowed to her (no dignity there, but in a relationship dignity is a luxury that I don't have more often than not). I got to open my mouth, ready to try and explain everything to her.

I probably can get out of this mess without getting beaten by someone I love IF I can choose the right words.

"DDDDDDDDDDDAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNGGGG!"

And a purple comet rocketed from the door right to me in a bear hug in such a speed that I doubt I could have done it better even at my best.

Also, it was at that instant that I noticed that Miku, which kept hugging me and repeating "Darling, darling", don't know how to read the mood.

First, I don't have a single clue about why she is calling me Darling.

Second is that the mood in question is a murderous one that is being released by a pissed off Seryu and an even more pissed Koro.

When I saw she took out an AK-47 with modified magical bullets, I could swear I heard someone laugh at me on the distance, taking pleasure of the troubles I found myself in more often than not.

I will do as I was taught since young in the Tower, in case of doubt blame Zelretch.

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After finishing explaining the situation for Seryu (especially on the 'why I saved a girl that almost killed her a few days ago' bit) I went to another place where an uncomfortable conversation was waiting for me. Deciding to ignore Miku was just a bonus, the girl wasn't making sense and I had something to do so I will wait for her to calm down and then go see her.

"Finally, I was getting tired of waiting." The girl that I needed to talk to said in a tired tone. Damn her, even when she is on 'enemy' territory she had a better night than me.

"Well, not everyone here had such a pleasant night as you Lugh." I said with a glare.

This girl was a whole other type of headache.

In the past, she always did nonsensical things to obtain her 'treasures' and almost got the Tower on a war many times.

I remember once that we suffered a zombie invasion back in the Tower due to Hades attacking to recuperate his cape that she stole.

Fun fact, that was the one time most of the guys in the Tower did not get pissed at her. Everyone hates that bag of bones; he is just too annoying.

Getting back to the topic I sit in front of Lugh so that she can explain to me what the hell happened. Why she turned coat and what are her intentions, those are the questions that I need to understand.

"So, what happened in the arena?" I asked.

"Well… I knew that those dudes from Iscariots were thinking of killing me, so I decided that I might as well finish them off first. But I knew that facing them all would be impossible" I know for a fact that, for her, it would be far from impossible. Just tiresome and hard. "so I decided to use the chance given to me."

"The chance being?"

"That they would try something evil and that you would send people to stop them. I just needed to sit down and wait for you guys to come and deal with them, also it was a chance to get the sword Mugen." She then shrugged her shoulders. "A treasure is a treasure and, as I don't know the ponytail guy, it was not a hard decision to try and kill him for his sword."

I want to face-palm right now. This girl is always like this, she would not kill someone she considers a friend as long as she could avoid it, but she would have no problem in killing pretty much anyone else.

Taking a deep breath, I continued.

"Why did you decide to run away from the Tower? And why did you steal that item? You know how important that is for Rin." I asked about the most important part.

As I know that she is under geass, to be honest, she will have to talk the truth. And that is what will define what I will do to her.

"Why did you leave the Tower and how did you end up with the Iscariots?" I asked fully ready to strike her down depending on the circumstances… or ask Akisame to take her down. My body and circuits are still quite sore.

"I left because I decided to look for intel about someone that also left the Tower, Valper Galilei. I heard he went to Iscariots for some intel that he desired so I also joined them to look for him."

As I heard that I could see how it could make sense. Valper was something like a godfather to her since young and he was quite important back in the Tower, him leaving made no sense as he loved the place.

But, since my father died he 'changed' according to the others in the Tower so who knows what is passing through his head.

She trying to go look for him is logical, but I still think it is far from explaining all the story.

"Continue, and explain ALL the reasons. If you think I will believe that this was your only reason you must be stupid." I said with some venom, but a bit less than before, in my voice. Doing what you can to help your family is the right thing to do most of the time.

Except for me, if I know Zelretch is going for some difficulties I will probably dance in joy. I will never forget that stinky bomb.

"Weeelll… they were a great scapegoat for all my stealing acts. I stole from many people and made sure that anyone that was searching for the items would happen to found a connection to Iscariots. This is how I got to steal Hermes Sandals without repercussion." She said with a devious smile, that I probably am doing just as well.

Knowing that she was pissing off somebody else, especially it being those fuckers, really made me happy. Sadistically happy, but happy nonetheless.

"I understand. So, long story short you went to Iscariots to search for Galilei and screw them over by making them scapegoats. While these desires are something I can agree to, the fact that you left the Tower and is a danger remains. Now answer me, what do you intend to do from now on?" I asked.

My rage towards her reduced by quite a few times, but not enough to simply let her walk always that easy. She is dangerous to others and herself due to getting dumb whenever she sees any treasure.

I still remember the time she stole the crown of the fairy queen WHILE we were there on a peace treaty. I almost got killed and all she did was cheer them on in killing me so that she could get my swords.

She did help me get out of that but it was not an instantaneous decision of hers. It was more her fear of what would happen in the future if she didn't, she fears Illya like a demon and Berserker as the executioner and both like me (a bit too much during those survival trainings if you ask me).

"Well…" was what she said with an embarrassed face. That face made me get the chills, whenever she had that face she ends up having an outrageous request. One that is likely to get me in a bad spot. "I was hoping you could hire me as a bodyguard for you or something. This way you get extra protection and I can have a backer to not let me get killed in revenge by Iscariots."

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"Let's go with NO for that one." I said after being paralyzed for a few instants.

"Why not? Am I not capable enough of protecting you?" She said in a bit of desperation.

I know why she is acting like this, she knows that she has no more backer right now and most likely no one else would accept her that she could approve.

Most of those that she could work with she already stole from, and the others are genocidal monsters that she would end up killing herself.

"Because you are the type that would run away first when danger arrives. I can't and won't hire you to be my bodyguard." And I don't have the money to do so. Rin is cheap enough that I can barely deal with my normal expenses and now that Serenity will likely be going to live with me (the whole 'only one that she can cure her of her poison' being a big part of the reason) I honestly don't have the funds to hire Lugh.

"C-can't you find somewhere for me then? Please, for a friend." She said with her own version of puppy-dog eyes, that could have worked if I wasn't used to girls using them with me all the time (the fact that I bend to those eyes most of the time is not relevant, or so my male pride says).

As I thought about what she said an idea came to my mind. An idea that could be beneficial to the Tower and solve a LOT of my problems.

"If you REALLY want to go back to the Tower you could sign a master-servant contract with me." I said and her face immediately fell a bit. A master-servant contract allows for the master (A.K.A. me) knows the location of the servant (A.K.A. this thief right here) at all times.

It also makes her incapable of defying me, not that I would abuse the contract but the thought of her not cheering for whoever is trying to kill me is an attractive prospect.

And the final bonus is that it also helps us to get stronger the more the time passes, even if the boost is negligible most of the time. Kinda like the boost that devils have, it only is impressive with a long time and is not something I particularly enjoy.

But she will enjoy less so that makes it a good thing for me (I will never forget the time she stole all my stock of ultra-deluxe pudding just so that she could have my 'treasure', I was four at that time and I still remember clear as day).

It was clear to anyone that she was struggling with the decision

"Is there no other option?" She said while gnashing her teeth.

I smiled and answered. "Nope."

Seeing her frustrated makes me so happy. Every time I manage to do that I feel a bit better about myself.

"Why is that the only option? Can't we simply enter a geass or something?" She asked

"Nope, this one is the only option. If I let it be a simple geass you would find a way around it so that you can steal some more. On the other hand, with this one, you cannot disobey a direct order and I will ALWAYS know where you are. No more sneaking around to steal something or run away without warning." I said with a victorious expression.

This is the only way for me to accept her back in the Tower, and I am the best chance she got to get back. If she tries the other instructors the chance is nil and if she tries Rin she will likely die, no exaggeration in that either.

She stole that item after all. Dumb idea, truly dumb one.

As if defeated in battle Lugh dropped her head and sighed in defeat when she said.

"Fine, but I have a few conditions to accept that."

"Of course, you can ask anything." Again, I would be a terrifying lawyer or devil. As she can 'ask' for anything, not that I will follow her requests.

"Can you sign a geass that says that you will not send me on any suicidal mission, will not order me to do anything against my moral code and that any punishment will not be suffering?" She asks.

Honestly, I never planned to let any of those three things so I have no issue with that. For the first two requests, they are part of the course, I will not order her around or anything. I am not a slaver or anything of the sort.

And about the punishment, I have a better idea than 'suffering'.

"Those are acceptable. Also, I want to add that if, at any moment, you want to leave you will be free to do so. But I will need a proper explanation about the reason and a warning before we end the contract." I said, much to her relief.

I never intended to make her a slave or anything, just to have a way to make absolutely sure that she will not use the Tower's baking to commit even more thievery or just go away out of nowhere.

She did that way too much in the past… now that I think about it she acts like a stray cat most of the time. She comes when she wants, leaves when she wants and does whatever the hell she pleases most of the time.

"I accept." Was her answer, even if her displeased face was evidence of how much she did not want any of that.

I nodded and quickly started drawing the magical circle. It was not overly complex and I finished it in a question of 2 minutes.

After that we entered the circle and started the ritual, the chant was long and boring (the one that made this contract must have been a bureaucrat) but in the end the contract was completed and the magical symbol of it appeared in the top of my hand.

Lugh slowly, and very reluctantly kneeled on the ground and kissed it. And in that instant that everything was going well, things took a turn for the worse (again, I blame Zelretch and my nature).

The door swung open and from there three people entered all at once.

"Darling, what is taking you so lo-" and so said Miku.

"Castiel, is this still going to take much long-" this was Emily.

"Boss, is everything oka-" and so said Seryu.

Now, this looks bad. Like really bad.

I am on the opposite side of the door with Lugh kneeling in front of me with her back turned to them. Due to being on her knees she is on the same height as my crotch and anyone from the door can't tell for sure what she is doing.

My next actions were coldly calculated, and I take pride in that I did not go with the option that so many others do to say 'this is not what you think'. That phrase NEVER works.

I did the best action possible, the only one that would guaranty that I will not be killed.

I turned around and throw myself out of the window!

Staying there means death, no questions asked, but if I run away fast enough I may survive a few more instants.

Cowardice for the win!

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After half an hour (and asking Arthur, that had woken up, if the girls are still out for blood) I went back.

When I get back I had to face three VERY pissed girls and one that had an amused smile on her face (damn Lugh).

"…So?" was all Seryu said while looking at me with eyes as empty as when she is hunting stray-devils. A good sign, if I faced her at that moment I have no doubt that I would have to face up with some big guns and Koro. A pissed Koro.

I'd rather survival training over that (and that is saying a lot).

"I was concluding a master-servant ritual with Lugh." I said, trying to act normal while there was so much sweat drops rolling out of my back that it could be mixed with a waterfall. "What you girls saw was the fealty kiss given in the end. Nothing more, nothing less."

Please let it work, please God let it work.

After a few moments with Seryu, Emily and Miku (why is she acting like this?) staring down at me they finally relaxed. It seems like they believe me.

Thank you God for this help, I knew believing in you in my hours of need would work eventually.

As I got relieved I could not help but ask.

"Miku, why are you calling me darling out of nowhere?" I said tilting my head a bit.

I honestly cannot understand the reason as to why this is happening, but I know that I need to get a clearer picture of what trouble I am now.

"Because darling is darling, silly." She said with a smile so radiant that probably even the sun is less shiny.

I rubbed my head, trying to understand what she said. Again I see the wisdom of Lancer-sensei when he said that 'women are crazy'.

"And why am I your darling?" I asked in the most neutral and gentle way possible.

Her smile did not waver when she answered me.

"Because you are my fiancé, and my darling."

I froze.

Seryu froze.

Emily froze.

Everyone in the room froze.

"Take care of me for now on, hubby." Miku said while hugging me.

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WHAT?!

And I mean WHAT!

Why is this happening? What is going on?

And why are Emily, Seryu, and Serenity looking at me as if I was garbage?

"Hahahahahaha, never a dull moment around you. I missed that, hahahahahahahaha" Lugh said while laughing nonstop.

However, I smiled as I saw that the punishment I put in her started taking effect. He whole body started trembling with itchiness, she could not even move properly as she contorted all around trying to reach those few spots that no one ever reaches.

Unfortunately, the joke ultimately is still me, as I run away from there not even 10 minutes after I came back to the apartment. But this time with Miku glued to me in a hug and all the girls running after me with their weapons ready saying something like 'cheater', 'pervert' and 'harem idiot'.

Again, I blame Zelretch.