Thickest Plot Armors

Ever wondered how shitty a plot could be?



Picked up a stone on the side of a road.



"Is this the legendary Palace of Divine Dragon Empress?!"



"Hmm? Brat, who are you?! How dare you awaken this Emperess!"



.

Bought a normal average steel sword.



"Wait? Is this the Eternal Heavenly Sword?"



"Hmm? Are you my new master?"



.

Went to a merchant, bought a ring with the cheapest price.



"...The Divine Spirit Ring!"



"..."