Chapter 20 : Futility

Okay so, days went by like the usual.

And it was pretty obvious to everybody in our group that Francis liked Rose.

Many of them supported the two and encouraged them to take the step towards dating.

This was gonna hurt big time, to see the love of my life, being with someone else.

Sucks even more when that someone else turns out to be your best friend.

Eventually there came a time when Francis decided to propose to her, and asked us all to help him out.

They all did, except me.

I made up an excuse and didn't go.

I just couldn't get myself to go and see that.

As per what I heard from the rest,

They said he bought balloons, a ring and a teddy bear for her, to propose.

They said he knelt down.

They said she accepted.

They said she was happy, and everyone teased her as she was blushing.

My heart sank. I wanted to cry.

But I kept reminding myself that if I really wanted her to be happy, then I'd have to deal with this.

It felt horrible, but I did not want to be the bad guy.

At one point I really asked myself, why am I even writing these diary entries anymore?

It's just so freaking hopeless.

I'M HOPELESS.

I'm a mess.

What am I even doing?

Is this what I would get for just loving a person?