Ally and I start towards the car in awkward silence. I'm grinning like a goof and a child, but I can't help it. I can't stop replaying what just happened in my mind like a movie. It happened so fast that I almost forgot what was going on before it did. I want it again. I want to do it again and again and again and suffocate her with my love. But I know I can't. I don't even know if we are even a thing. Like, what even happened? Why did it happen? Does she feel things for me as I do for her? Is there pity in this or is it just real and too good to believe?
I open the car door and look at Ally doing her own thing. She looks red, and a frowns has placed itself on her face. She looks mad or confused. Maybe she's wondering the same things I am. Maybe she's regretting it. I hope she's not. Because what I'm feeling is the best feeling I've ever had since my mother left me with a monster.
Ally starts the car again and clears her throat.
"So Neco and Alex's?" She says plastering a friendly and fake grin on her face.
I just look at her like an idiot. Like I'm a baby and I'm trying to understand what gibberish she's saying.
"What?" She asks. Her face falls and she looks irritated.
"Sorry." I say like I just broke my mother's vase. What??
"What??" She says as if reading my mind. She looks so confused and irritated with me that I look down and fidget just like I did when I was a child.
"Kero, we haven't even moved and you're acting weird.." she says with a sigh.
"I can't help it." I say. Have I turned into a eight year old or what?
"What do you mean?"
"Why are you pretending that didn't just happen?" I ask. Good job.
"I- I'm not." She says looking down.
"We need to discuss this, okay? We can't just be normal without a thought crossing our minds wondering what we are. We just kissed. We both kissed and I don't know about you but it felt fuckin amazing to me and I put so much emotion into that one kiss." I say in one big jumble. I'm out of breathe now.
Ally sits there speechless.
"Well?" I say begging for an answer with my eyes. Anything at all.
"Well, what do you think it means?" She asks.
"What? That's not going to help me Al, I need you to tell me how you feel about what just happened. What you felt when it did. If you liked it.."
"I...um..well- okay. I'm sorry, I'm just not good at these things. I never had this type of conversation before..um..look, I just think that I don't want to ruin our friendship and- well- yes, I liked it. I loved it. And I felt everything you put into that kiss, it's just...I'm..scared." She says stuttering on almost every other word. She is scared. And so am I. But I do want this more than anything.
"I'm scared too. I understand....but do you want this?"
"...yeah I do." She says. Her whole face turns red.
"Then lets make it happen."
She finally looks away from the road and at me.
"Sooo are we like, dating? Or- what?" She giggles.
"Yeah I guess we are." That stupid grin comes back and a burst of warmth goes through my body from my heart.
"Okay, now that this is figured out, I'm hungry so we gotta go." She says.
"Pizza pizza pizzaaaa" I say making Jazz hands.
Ally giggles and starts towards our friends' house. I look out the window and zone out. All I see is trees, trees, apartments, trees, gas station, and- wait what the hell? I sit up straight is my seat and strain my eyes to see this weird, circular, almost invisible thing. It looks like a.. a portal? What the what? Then I realize we aren't moving. There's not even a sound. The only thing I see moving is the circular movement around the 'portal' thing. I look behind me and Ally is frozen, her smile still there and her hair floating in the air. A bird is floating in the sky and the clouds have stopped moving. Did I fall asleep?