Fourteenth Lie

Have you ever feel extremely tired for no apparent reason? Have you ever feel happy and then finding yourself miserable the next? She was okay. She was happy yesterday and looking forward in attending school the next day but she never expected to feel that way.

Kaori was exhausted. Voices been taunting her ever since she woke up today. She doesn't want to wake up and just do nothing. She does not want to worry her cousin and Akane but the voices been mocking her, telling her how undeserving she is with Tsubaki and everyone's attention. She fought the battle inside her head and she came exhausted both emotionally and mentally. She hesitantly asked Akane to call the school for her since she does not feel like coming to school at all. Akane nodded and agreed but she did not miss the worry and concern looks that she's throwing at her. Kaori also called Tsubaki that she will be out of the school as well and sent an email to Watari and Kosei.

"You know Kaori, we're friends right? If you have any burdens or if you want to complain to anything and cry, you can reach out to me okay? Or to Kosei and Watari."

When Tsubaki sincerely conveyed those words, Kaori wants to cry there and then. She wants to ask for help. Tell Tsubaki that something is wrong with her and she's afraid because she don't know what to do. She's scared and she can't do anything. Kaori forced herself not to cry and just offer a smile and an empty promise to her friend because the voices are telling her not to be a burden as she already is.

She went straight to her room after her talk with Akane. She hugged the kitten that she call her own and went to bed.

"Your name will be Shiro, okay? Shiro." She mumbled as pat the kitten who's looking straight to her eyes as if looking to her soul.

Kaori reached out her hand, wanting to feel the softness of the kitten. Shiro, who's been looking to her dark eyes shows her pointed nails and scratched the reaching hand. Kaori winced.

"Why?" Kaori asked Shiro. She's not mad, she's just surprised.

"Ah.. did you see the demons inside of me? Are you scared? Sorry.." somehow, her voice lack emotion. "Don't worry. I will not hurt you. They will not hurt you. Their target is my soul, so you should be safe."

Kaori stood up and went to the bathroom to wash the wound. It stings but it also feels good. The red blood brings delight within her. She wanted to see more of it. Kaori moved carelessly to the cabinet of the restroom and looked for the thing that she have been wanting to use. Once she located it, she carefully hold it using her three fingers that is trembling.  

Slowly. Slowly.

Kaori slowly fall into darkness. Embracing her, as if claiming her as their own. The next thing happened was all fuzzy. Was it after 15 minutes? An hour since she spaced out? She's not aware but when Kaori suddenly came back to reality, her breath is uneven.

'Eh? W-what happened?'

Kaori was confused to see the blood all over her arms. She was scared to see her own blood and noticed a razor that she's holding. She doesn't know when and what happened. She just snapped when she started to feel numb. Kaori dropped the razor. Afraid that she will hurt herself more unconsciously.

Kaori urgently turned the shower on, letting the hot water run through her body and wash all the blood. She can now see the fresh red cuts all over her arms.

"What is happening to me?" she whispered, her voice aghast as her strength left her and her body fell on the cold floor. "U-uu… k..kuuu..!!"

Kaori let out an agonizing cry. She cried because she's scared. She cried because she can't understand what is happening. She let out everything and just cried. Her cuts are left forgotten. Kaori screamed while crying.

Akane and Hiromi bursts open the door when they heard the cry of Kaori. Hiromi rushed to her side asking what is wrong and where it hurts. Akane who noticed the cuts from her arms, covered her mouth with her hands from surprise as tears fell down from her eyes. Hiromi hurriedly asked Akane to shut off the shower and Akane moved then flinched as the hot water hit her skin. After she shut off the shower she crouch and helped Hiromi to calm Kaori down. Kaori's skin was all red because of the hot water that poured on her body, Akane doesn't even know how long Kaori stayed under the hot shower, that must hurt a lot. But Kaori did not care. She continue to let out a cry after heartbreaking cry until no tears left and everything went black.