CHAPTER 86

I've lived my whole life feeling empty. Like there was this big hole in my heart that needed to be filled. Sometimes I felt incredibly nervous for no reason, my heart starts beating faster and I shake my legs hoping to shake away the nervousness I felt. But it doesn't work.

I guess life was preparing me for this day, it was teaching me how to be nervous and how to feel empty. Helping me get used to it more like in preparation for future occurrence.

The thought that Scar didn't care made a difference. At some point I just wanted to give in to Ken. But it was not my choice to make, it was the choice of my heart and my mind. And they wanted the guy in my dreams, the one I forgot his face every time I awoke.

"Touch me, Mira." Ken begged lustfully, taking my hand in his and stretching it to touch him.

I Let him guide my hand to his chest.

"After touching and sucking your yet developed breast I should add, I kissed your neck then your stomach. Let me show you"

He said going all the way down to my belly button and kissing it.

His tongue gilded over it, his hot breath fanned my skin. He stopped suddenly and I felt relieved. My eyes were open, but I could not see from the cloud of tears blocking my vision, I only heard him.

His hands moved up to my firm boobs and he twisted my left nipple.

"Oh God I'm going to come just from touching you in such way." Ken groaned.

"I've waited so long for this. I can't believe I finally have you hear. But. I won't rush anything. I want to savour this moment." He added.

Unable to told back the disgust I spat on his face.

He jolted back plunging his hand into his pocket. He brought out a white Hanky and wiped my spittle which was all over his forehead and dripping down his face with it.

"You bitch!" He growled, throwing away the hanky. Then he broke into a fitful laughter.

"I will come back to you." He promised, still laughing.

His eyes told a story of vengeance and anger so deep it resembled the eyes of a monster and maybe that's what he was.

A monster. Just like all gang leaders.

I gave him a daring look even if I was squirming underneath my skin. My heart beat wildly in my chest as I feared that he would hit me, but instead he smiled and walked over to Scar.

It was then I noticed that Scar's eyes were closed. Tears stained his cheek and he was breathing harshly.

I wondered if it was because he was tired and afraid or because he couldn't do anything to help me. Or it just dawned on him that he had been kidnapped.

Maybe they were right after all, maybe I was really destined to be a slut. It hurt me that I disappointed myself but it hurt me more that I disappointed him and it hurt me much more that maybe my father was right all along.

Maybe I was made just to pleasure men.

"You should open your eyes, Lion!" Ken chuckled. "Oh he was crying how pitiful."

"Ken." I whispered. I was not sure he heard me. I didn't hear me.

"Can you see that Mira? he thinks life is a fairy tale and his tale with you will be called the beauty and the beast. Sorry to burst your bubbles but life is no fairy tale or movie. This is reality, and reality is real." Ken mocked.

Just then Scar looked at me and we held our gaze.

Looking at his eyes, as he stared at me felt as if I was staring at the scorching sun when its heat was the highest, when it shown the brightest. When it was just setting.

His eyes burnt not just my heart but my soul. A flame too hot to withstand that my body no longer felt numb. I finally felt and what I felt scared me.

"You want Me, you have me. Just leave him alone!" I snapped, getting out of the delirium I had been in.

I couldn't stand staring into Scars eyes, into those eyes that held emotions I didn't want to fathom.

"Yes I will leave him be." Ken wasn't facing me, but I guessed he was smiling and I knew he was Lying, he had to be. He won't let Scar leave even though he had me already.

"You will?" I asked feigning surprise.

Knowing Ken he would Love to torment scar. There was no way he would give up on it just because I begged him to.

Still I hoped that he would.

"Yes if you give yourself to me willingly." He said turning around to face me.

"I didn't exactly fight you Ken." I murmured. I covered my breast with my hand as I became aware of his eyes on lingering on my body.

"But You didn't respond the way I wanted." He spat. He faced Scar and gripped the back of his head forcing him to look into his eyes. "You will suffer and beg for death."

"Let him go and I'll be yours for as long as you desire"

I tried to get over the fact that the first time Scar would be seeing me half naked so happened to be when someone was trying to get their way on me.

Ken started laughing hysterically and I mean that in every sense literally and figuratively. It started as a smile, then a chuckle. Now he was laughing like a maniac.

"I'm sorry you said what?" he asked, still laughing.

"I said you should let him go. What do you need him for anyway?" I asked, glaring at him. My voice was laced with so much disgust he flinched at it.

"He is stronger than Everyone here together in a fist combat. How do you think he would be with a gun if he gets one. I don't like to think you consider me stupid?!" Ken growled.

"All you have to do is escort him with a gun outside and_"

"No! Shut up!" Ken shouted. I moved back shocked at his reaction. He reminded me of my father.

When he saw how fast I cowered he held the bridge of his nose and inhaled deeply. "I'm sorry Mira." He apologized.

I nodded trying to hold back the tears that threatened to fall down my eyes.

Me nodding was obviously not enough assurance for Ken because he started walking towards me totally forgetting about Scar.

I didn't know if to be happy about it or sad, either ways I braced myself to him.