5. Taste like you.

Ezinne seemed to have immediately lost her appetite the moment she saw her father step into the dining room. She was no longer eating as fast as before; instead, she looked like she was about to cry, and it saddened me.

I held her hand reassuringly while I watched Cletus put a spoonful of rice in his mouth, anger written all over his face.

"What is this?" he scowled, pushing the food away as if it were poison.

"Daddy, it is rice and stew," Ezinne replied, smiling.

"Did I ask you a question, you disrespectful brat? I don't blame you. I blame your mother, who has spoiled you so much that you no longer have respect for your father. She has been telling you that you can talk back at me, is that it?!" he yelled, slamming his fist on the table.

Ezinne shook her head repeatedly as she sobbed.

"Leave Ezinne out of your anger this morning. She didn't do anything wrong by replying to you. Besides, what is wrong with the food, Cletus? What?" I asked, on the brink of tears. My nose was beginning to gather fluid as I stared at him. I was shocked at the way he spoke to our daughter. Didn't he love her? Or did he hate her because of what I had done to save her life?

"So now you are challenging me, is that it? And you are also teaching my daughter how to challenge me too?"

"I'm not challenging you, my husband. I just want to know what is wrong with the food so that I won't make the same mistake next time," I pleaded, cutting in. "Is there not enough salt or pepper, or is there too much? What exactly is the problem?"

"Oh, so you want to know what is wrong with the food, abi? You will soon know. The food tastes just like you—bitter and ugly." He sprang from his seat and pointed at me in anger. "The sight of you makes me sick!"

"Come over here, now!" he ordered.

I remained seated, afraid of what he would do.

"Please, I'm sorry," I sobbed quietly. "I prepared it well…"

"I said come over here now! Or are you deaf?!" he screamed, startling me.

I jumped up from my seat and walked slowly toward him. My heart pounded wildly against my chest, and I was fidgeting from head to toe. I could barely keep my eyes open. Ezinne started to cry.

"Was this meat warmed properly before you used it?" he asked. Before I could even think of a reply, he grabbed the plate of rice I had dished out for him and poured it all over my face. Then he spat at me.

"You and your food disgust me," he growled, pushing me aside as he walked out of the dining room.

I immediately closed my eyes to prevent the stew from seeping in. The heat of the food burned my skin, making me wail in pain. My face, neck, and entire body felt like they were on fire.

I could hear Ezinne stand up from her chair. Opening one eye slightly, I saw her hitting him continuously on his waist while crying. "Daddy, why?" she kept saying through her sobs.

He hissed and pushed her away gently. "Get out! I have no time for this gang-up between you and your mother!" he yelled. With that, he walked away and slammed the parlor door behind him.

I quickly closed my eyes again and ran to the kitchen to wash my face. I bent over the sink, letting the cold water from the running tap soothe my burning skin as I cried. I scrubbed my face with soap repeatedly until my eyes turned bloodshot.

Ezinne rushed into the kitchen and hugged me tightly.

"Mummy, it will be alright. Don't mind Daddy. He is a monster; you are an angel," she cried.

"I don't like him. I don't like him at all! Please, let's run away. Let's leave him!"

Usually, I would have chided her for saying such things while assuring her that her father was a good person. But I just couldn't do that now. My eyes were still closed, and my face still felt like it was on fire.

"My God, why have You forsaken me?!" I suddenly screamed.

"Is my sin the greatest, Lord? Do You still hold all my past atrocities against me?"

Ezinne kept sobbing, and I realized what a bad mother I was. For her, I had to be strong. Truthfully, she was the only reason I persevered. I hugged her tightly, running my fingers through her hair as I gathered the strength and courage to wipe my face.

I had to take her to school before it was too late. If she was late, her teacher would know something was wrong. I couldn't let anyone know how bad my marriage was. They would laugh at me.