Part 23

"Are you nervous?" Lian asked her son.

"About what?" He responded.

"Seeing her again."

"No. Why would I be?"

"…because she broke your heart."

Quan rolled his eyes and sighed.

"Ok, well, just don't worry. I'll be there if you need a shoulder to cry on."

Quan looked at his mother and saw her holding back a laugh. "You're cruel," he said, unable to keep from smiling himself. "You know that right?"

"I have been told…" she nodded and let her jovial tone hang in the air as they approached Brilliant River Valley.

A week and a half had passed since they'd left the village and the Xue family behind. Most of that time was spent in Daming, selling the Zhosian goods. Their commercial exploits had gone rather well, all things considered, and she was sure she'd even be able to turn a small profit once everyone in Zhosian was paid.

More important than their trading experience though, Lian had watched her son revel in his first taste of Imperial city life. Daming was one of the larger cities in the Empire – over half a million people lived there – but it was nothing compared to Liangyong or Nianjang or Binpei. Still, it was twice as large as Bhuo, and had all the trappings of an Imperial capital: street entertainers, parades, an old castle, brothels, theatres, even an opera house. Every corner they turned was a new set of sights and experiences, and Lian was overjoyed to watch him absorb each one with joy and enthusiasm. Quan, in his Zhosian robes, also stood out, drawing attention from passersbys, as well as each merchant and wholesaler Lian introduced him to. One had even taken Lian aside and asked if the boy was ready for marriage to his daughter. Lian hadn't mentioned that particular incident to her son.

Finally they'd left the city behind, and without any planning, headed towards Brilliant River Valley. Both were anxious to see the Xues again. Not that Lian questioned her decision to leave abruptly: she simply wanted to check in and see how Fen and Tan were getting along.

When they entered the village, it was mostly empty with everyone out tending to their crops, which were nearing the harvesting period. The pair made their way to Fen's home, and saw the customary white and black flag planted outside their door, indicating that they were in mourning. There had been several in the village, casualties of the bandits in one form or another. They tied up their horses and then Lian knocked on the door.

Li Jie appeared and a smile came over his face. "Zhao!" He stepped outside and bowed, then clasped her forearm in his. "It's good to see you again."

"And you, Mr. Xue," she responded.

"Quan," Li Jie stepped towards the younger and also shook hands.

"Mr. Xue," Quan responded, smiling.

"Have there been any troubles since we left?" Lian asked.

"No," Li Jie shook his head and assured her. "The magistrate has been dealing with the bandits, one per day. If they have any family nearby they come in for the hearing, and together they make decisions. If the family is willing to take them back, they usually do. Some haven't. It's been… difficult, but we've managed."

"And, uh…" Lian glanced past Li Jie into the dark house, "your family?"

"The children are—" Li Jie started before Fen appeared in that darkness, dressed in pure white, and stepped outside.

"You're back." She said.

"Fen, you should be inside," Li Jie told her, trying to usher her back indoors.

"Father's spirit has already gone, uncle," she reassured him, "my prayers aren't doing anything at this point."

"Fen, please," he begged, but she held up her hand and silenced him.

"I owe them. Both of them." She turned to her uncle and smiled, "I promise, I'll be back inside in a minute. But for now, could you leave us alone?"

Li Jie considered it, then nodded and smiled at all three of them before heading back inside.

Fen examined her clothes in the sunlight – she had been indoors ever since they'd buried her father, observing the traditional rites of two weeks mourning and prayers – and hadn't realized how dirty her pure white funeral clothes had become. "I'm filthy," she admitted, a tone of self-ridicule in her voice. "I'm sorry."

"You look fine," Quan said quietly. Fen looked up at him and smiled wider.

"Thank you."

"How are you and your brother?" Lian asked.

"Fine. We will be fine."

"Has the prefect already…"

"Yes. He's claimed the land. Tan is to report to his residence as soon as our prayers are complete. But I'm not going to let them have him too. All they want is the land, and they have it. There's no need for them to lock Tan up or hurt him. I think we're going to head to Daming."

"Really?" Lian was skeptical. "You're not going to live with your uncle?"

"He's already spread too thin. My aunt and their children should be his focus. We'd just be a drain."

"What will you do in Daming?" Quan asked, concern tactile in his voice.

"I'm not sure," she admitted. "I can read and write. I'm quite good with figures. Maybe I can learn bookkeeping or something. I've been running our estate for the last few years, maybe someone will think that experience has some value."

"Actually," a thought occurred to Lian. "someone does. Me."

"What do you mean?"

"I have interests in… a few businesses in Daming. One of them is an inn, where I usually stay when I'm in the city. And we just lost our bookkeeper. I'll tell you what. When you head into the city, find a place called the Blue Mountain Lodge. Tell them I sent you, and that you're there for Da Li's job. He was our old bookkeeper. And…" Lian reached into the small purse she kept on her belt, removing a single gold coin. "Give this to them when you arrive. They'll know it's from me."

Fen started to shake, her hand vibrating as she slowly reached out for the coin and took it. "Thank you," she responded in a coarse whisper, tears welling up in her eyes. "Thank you." She repeated, stronger. "Thank you so much."

"Thank you," Lian responded. "It's hard to find good financial help these days. Just promise me one thing Fen."

"Anything."

"Don't become a full-fledged accountant. You're too pretty for the haircut."

Fen laughed, then broke down crying. Lian approached and pulled the girl in close.

"You're going to be ok," Lian reassured her.

Fen recollected herself quickly, wiping away tears before she spoke again. "I should thank you also for everything you did with the bandits. I realized after you left I never did formally thank you."

"It's nothing," Lian said. "Just helping where I can."

"Still," Fen righted herself and exhaled deeply. Then she bowed formally and smiled. "Thank you. Sincerely."

Lian returned the bow and replied, "You're welcome."

Then Fen turned to face Quan. "Now," she said, "you." The boy froze.

"Um, what about me?"

"I owe you an apology."

"Oh," he scratched his head. "You were under a lot of stress, I know."

Fen laughed, then stepped forward and gave him a hug. "Still," she whispered in his ear, "I'm sorry." They parted slightly and she continued. "Your first kiss really shouldn't have been like that."

Quan blushed, but the hug had given him a chance to smell her again. Even a week and a half inside a dirty old home, she smelled lovely. "It's, it's ok," he responded, then smiled. "Hey, at least I'll never forget it."

Fen chuckled again, then nodded. "You're right, you won't." Then she stepped forward, took his cheeks in her hands, and said. "Or your second kiss, I hope." Then she kissed him again, fully. A long, soft kiss he had no idea how to respond to. When she pulled away, his entire face was dazed. Lian fought vainly to keep from breaking into laughter.

"Nope," Quan eventually responded. "Won't forget that one either."

"You'll find your Shuli eventually. Or at least some good Li," Fen said, then backed away to face both of them. "Thank you both, again. Perhaps, I will see you in Daming then, later this year?"

"Yes," Lian replied, "I'll be down there in a month or so probably. Just taking Quan home first."

Fen nodded, smiled deeper again, and then went back inside, shutting the door behind her.

Quan stood there, staring at the door, so completely immobile Lian had to snap her fingers to break him out of it.

"You ok?" She asked.

"Yup," he responded. "Yup, I'm good."

"Reconsidering everything I told you about sex?" She asked as they headed back towards their horses.

Quan took a moment to think about it as he lifted himself onto his saddle. "Maybe a bit," he admitted sheepishly.

"Well, if the girls in Bhuo are as frigid as you, you're probably going to strike out for at least the next nine months or so. But maybe next year when we go down to Daming… let's just say I know a great little brothel in town."

"You own it don't you?"

"Only like… eighty percent. It's nothing really."

"You're terrible," he shook his head as they started their exit from the village. "You really don't think I could convince any of the Zhosian girls?"

"I don't know, you tell me," Lian chuckled.

They started off towards the south and the Zhosian mountains. They trotted along in silence for several minutes before Quan asked, "You told me Shuli meant love."

Lian glanced at her son but didn't turn. "That's right."

"Fen told me there's actually two words for love."

"Well, yeah, that's right."

"So Shuli Go actually means love-love, Go?"

Lian chuckled. "Kind of. In ancient Imperial, Shu was the long-lasting love—"

"And Li was the short term love," Quan cut her off.

"That's right. And in ancient Imperial, marriage was supposed to be both. You were supposed to marry someone you could love intensely, for a long time. So there's another word for marriage, yin, but I guess you could say the romantic word for it was shuli."

"So Shuli Go were, what? Married to their Gos?"

"Basically, yeah. We were supposed to love every one of the citizens we protected with enough intensity to keep them safe, and enough… familial love… to keep them in line."

Quan rode on in silence, thinking it over. "That sounds hard."

"Yeah," Lian admitted. "But I'll tell you what. You'd have made a pretty good Shuli Go."

Quan's smile crept into, then consumed, his face. And it didn't go away until they set up camp for the night.