A Bottle of Hemlock

"I worked hard to improve my skills, but somehow I could never master things as quickly as he could. I felt like a disappointment to Shifu sometimes, especially since I was his eldest disciple. Sometimes I couldn't help feeling jealous of ShanQuan, how easy it seemed for him compared to me. I knew it was just my own lack of ability, but what I couldn't accept was that all the hard work I put in couldn't place me on the same level as ShanQuan. It seemed unfair."

His voice was quiet and matter-of-fact, but his big fingers kneaded the spring onion pancake relentlessly.

"When ShiFu decided to teach Shan Quan his Seven Steps formation, I was unhappy at first. We all expected that as the eldest disciple, I should be the first choice by ranking.

"ShanQuan was a good fellow. He tried not to brag, but it was impossible for him not to hurt my pride. He was young. Flushed with success, thrilled that ShiFu had chosen him, with big dreams for the future.

"For the first few days I avoided Shan Quan and the others and was sullen--what a fool I was. Shifu took me aside and lectured me sternly, and I swallowed my pride and accepted that I was just incompetent."

"We had a feast that night, to celebrate ShanQuan's promotion. I only remember Jinfeng waking me up in a panic. ShanQuan was on the floor gasping and clutching his abdomen. There was vomit on the ground around him and he could not breath, let alone talk, no matter what we did to try and help him. He died in agony, not long after Shifu arrived. Shifu knew that he had been poisoned--but by who?"

Dao Ge gave a little shrug. "Who else but me had a motive for poisoning him? I was in a daze. I sat there like an idiot while they searched my room and found the poison. It was hemlock, a small bottle of it. I had never seen it before, but Si GeJian pointed out that I had gone drinking by myself the other day when I was unhappy, and I must have gotten the poison from one of the traders who frequented the inn."

"And they believed him, just like that?" demanded Qingqing hotly. "How could he accuse you without witnesses?"

"Somehow, when he was speaking, I realized in a flash that he must have done it and framed me, though I didn't know why. I didn't know how to argue with him, so I just attacked him. I was rash, and afraid."

Qingqing sank her face into her palm and groaned hollowly. "That was stupid of you. Though admittedly I would have likely done the same in the same situation. Well, so what happened? Obviously you didn't manage to kill that rascal."

He sighed. "Shifu struck me down with a blow that left a scar I still have today. I remember lying on the ground, bleeding, but the pain was nothing compared to what was going on in my heart. If Xiachun had not intervened Shifu would have killed me then and there, he was so angry. To all appearances, I was trying to kill Si GeJian to silence him. Standing over my body, he renounced me as his disciple and forbade me from ever returning. But he had received a huge blow, both in the death of his best disciple, and what he thought was the betrayal of his other senior disciple. XiaChun had to support her father out, and he was ill for days after. Si GeJian and JinFeng took ShanQuan's body away. I was left to crawl my way out of the inn."

"Didn't you try to defend yourself at all?" Qingqing said sharply.

"Oh, of course I tried. In the next few days, as soon as I was strong enough, I kneeled before the door imploring them to let me see Shifu. But Si GeJian wouldn't let me in, and Shifu himself was ill and refused to see me. XiaChun was the only one. She gave me money, and clothes, and told me to wait until Shifu was more stable and had calmed down. JinFeng, poor boy, was badly shaken. He came out to see me with XiaChun but he just stood there dumbly, without speaking or touching me."

Dao Ge's voice suddenly ached. "ShanQuan had been his idol, but I was like his older brother. I loved that boy, and it broke my heart to see him turn away. But I understand. It was too much for him to handle."

Qingqing chewed steadily on a spring onion pancake, unimpressed. "I don't. If that wretch had any belief in you he wouldn't have believed that Si GeJian so easily. But there, don't be upset about it. People are always undeserving," she offered helpfully.

"I was a broken man. I didn't see any chance of proving my innocence, so I wandered the jianghu for several years, thinking I had to make a new life for myself. Rumours said that Si GeJian had become the Senior Disciple, and that Shifu was under pressure to teach him the Seven Steps formation. When Shifu refused, they quarrelled and Si Gejian left in a fit of temper. Shifu was so enraged that he went into seclusion.Now that Si GeJian has shown his true colours and is on his own, I just need to find him. I'll drag him before Shifu and make him confess that he framed me, all those years ago, if I have to die doing it."

"A nice plan," Qingqing said politely, clapping briskly. "I don't think much of that Shifu of yours, to be sure," she added bluntly, "but I'd make it my business to let that Si GeJian die a lingering death if I were you."

"Don't slander my Shifu," rumbled Dao Ge warningly.

Qingqing shrugged her eyes. "Fine." she muttered, reaching out for another spring onion pancake.

"You've eaten two already. Didn't you say you were going to treat me to food? Why is it you're eating all of it faster than I can?" Dao Ge said in disgust.

She stuffed the pancake into her mouth and made a face at him. "Who asked you to talk so much instead of eating? Stop being so grumpy. I'll order another plate."