softee

When Kakashi deals the final blow to Zabuza, he accidentally takes Sakura down with him. Thus, homeless and alone, Haku follows the ninja back to the Leaf.

In which I, Haku of the Mist, under unpredictable and sure unfavorable circumstances, ended up filling the spot of Sakura on Team 7. What could go wrong with a three guy group anyway?

Be warned: excessive profanity and overly bro-mantic moments

Haku

"Kakashi-sensei. I don't think I can." Seeing that I got his attention, I continued, "I think my chakra flow is damaged. I don't want to push it." I feigned a sigh of disappointment as I leaned back on my now upright bed.


Uchiha snorted next to me and Naruto rushed to fill me in on something apparently everyone knew but me.


"Haku. The doctors said you weren't experiencing anything serious. You were just suffering from fatigue and minor injuries, but mainly hunger."


The two Sharingan users were laughing under their breath. I just knew it.


"How about my ears bleeding though?" I protested.


"It was just the release of the blood that clotted from the earlier injury inflicted by Dosu. The fresh new blood wanted to unclog and clean out the old dried blood. It was actually a good thing. You're completely fine!" Naruto exclaimed and gave his thumbs up.


"So we'll resume practice as planned." Kakashi waved his hand to leave and joyfully leapt out of the window.


"He's watching the new movie of Icha Icha right?" I asked and both my comrades nodded in unison.


"Guess there's no helping it," I said as I folded my arms behind my head.


"Yo loser." I looked up at a smirking Sasuke with bandages covering his arms and legs. "Heard you won by mistake."


Oh right. I won since the Pig missed me by a few millimeters and fainted.


"Shut up dickhead. I didn't even want to win. Can't believe she fucked up such a good opportunity. Now I'm fucking stuck in the actual exam." 


[I really don't want to fight. I much rather live a peaceful life and stay away from these wackos. They can go fucking each other for all I care. Just leave me be.]


"Fuck you then. Better prepare yourself 'cause if we vs. each other, I'm gonna fucking kick your balls off with my Lions Barrage."


"You should be more worried about your own balls before I freeze them spermless." I lifted my eyebrow to piss him off.


[Even I was lost in this conversation. But I made a promise to always have the last word when I bullshit with Uchiha.]


I dragged my feet around the hospital, wiping the walls with my body as I sauntered through the quiet facility for the thousandth time.


"Haku-san. Please refrain from disturbing the other patients," the nurse told me.


I tilted my head slightly to the right. "I will try not to, Rin-chan."


Yeah. I know every hospital staff's name by now. I've been stuck in the hospital for over a week already. Apparently, I was anemic and diagnosed with something that I can't remember which required me to stay under care until the medical team decide I am healthy enough to resume practice.


Old Orange and Blue is currently receiving training from Pervy Sage and Pervy Disciple, respectively. I am suspecting that since they couldn't find me another pervy sensei, they bribed the hospital people to stall me in this hell hole for the time being.


I mean. That's cool. It's not like I wanted to fight anyways. But I really can't take this any longer. I ripped the needle they stuck up my arm and finally unattached myself from the silver pole holding the IV drip I had to push around everywhere I went.


FREEDOM! I wanted to scream, if not for the scene playing out in my neighbor patient's room that stopped me in my tracks.


Preliminaries: Part IV