Not Tonight

Soon as she punched in her attendance, Yvonne was brought to the Records Section where she was introduced to everyone in their department.

She was then tasked to sort out countless cases filed by the Public Attorney's Office. While scanning them, she took the opportunity to study each cases and found a lot of interesting things. She took down notes on matters which she deemed of great help in her course.

As morning rolled by, her neck became stiff from thumbing through numerous sky-high stack of folders. She massaged the back of her neck then decided take a short break and headed to their office pantry.

While she was making her cup of tea, Yvonne remembered she hadn't replied yet to the text message of Brien.

She hastily typed in her phone:

[Not tonight. We need to talk soon.]

Just as Yvonne sat back down on her station, her phone started ringing.

[Caller: Brien Ahsan]

'Speaking of the devil.' She thought.

She ignored the call and resumed to her task. By lunch time, her mind was already filled with newfound understanding and knowledge, which heightened up her determination to pursue her dreams.

"Miss Yvonne, we're going to have our lunch at the noodle house across the street. Come and join us!" Jim Amitera invited her. He was a forty-year old supervisor.

"Yes, thank you, Supervisor Jim. Let me just clean this up." She politely accepted the invitation.

Yvonne gathered her things and followed the rest to the noodle house.

When they arrived, the place was already crowded. They quickly chose which dish to order so that they won't have to wait long when a table opened for them.

Their food arrived and she was overjoyed with the amount of servings they have on her bowl. Conversations started to flow and everyone took their time to get to know Yvonne.

After taking a slurp of her dimsum noodles, she took out her phone and saw a lot of hateful messages from Brien Ahsan:

[What do we need to talk about? Did I do something wrong?]

[Why are you ignoring me? Are you so busy that you've forgotten you have a boyfriend?]

[You already met someone else to replace me, didn't you?]

Reading his messages almost made Yvonne lost her appetite. Well, almost. Food comes first for her.

Since her rebirth, she vowed to decide things on her own. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, she refuses to be manipulated anymore by the people around her.

"Miss Yvonne, why aren't you eating? Don't you like that dimsum noodle?" Istee looked at her worriedly. She was one of the assistant administrators in their department.

"Just an annoying fly buzzing some nonsense." Yvonne shook her head, while holding out her phone.

She then returned her focus on the delicious, aromatic bowl of noodles in front of her.

Half an hour later, their group got back to the office and resumed their daily work. Yvonne continued to file and study the documents as was instructed to her. From time to time, Supervisor Jim would drop by and she would take the chance to ask him about the inner works of the Public Attorney's Office.

"Why do you want to become a lawyer?" Supervisor Jim amusedly asked her at some point.

"Don't you know that 'the main business of a lawyer is to take the romance, the mystery, the irony and even the ambiguity out of everything he touches'[1]?"

"The leading rule for a lawyer, as for a man of every calling, is diligence[2]." Supervisor Jim raised his brows at Yvonne's counter.

"Ideally, lawyers defend the rights of the people. They may be construed as to be 'skilled in circumventing the law'[3], but in this world, there is the rule of law. Not to mention, due process. On another note, let's face it. The profession pays better," Yvonne chuckled at the end.

"Well, I only hope that you won't become like those lawyers whose eyes are only for the money." Supervisor Jim left his words to the girl.

By the end of the day, Yvonne had read so much documents that at almost every turn of her eyes, she could faintly see several legal jargons as if reading a subtitle on a foreign movie.

~×~×~×~×~

Alone in her room, Yvonne let her mind wander over her past relationship with Brien.

They met in the university where he was a professor teaching English major under a different course, while she studied Bachelor of Arts in Political Science. As she was active in the student council, it was during a student campaign that she first laid eyes on him. It was an instant connection for both of them.

One heartfelt conversation after another led to a relationship that created a beautiful world to her. She made Brien her whole world, her universe, that nothing and no one else mattered aside from him. Even her own parents were set aside.

Yvonne's eyes would light up whenever Brien's name appeared. A contented smile would show at the mere thought of him. She would glow from within whenever he was near.

Everyone around them thought that they were meant to be just by looking at how blissful the atmosphere around them was.

When Brien lost his teaching job at the university, Yvonne immediately sought help from her mother. Mrs. Pereira lengthily scolded her daughter, but in the end, she took pity and called up her friends. Eventually, Brien successfully landed another teaching job where a friend of Mrs. Pereira was connected to.

Because it was in another city, Brien bought his own apartment there. The distance between them was farther than expected. It just so happened that her internship had started and Yvonne found it difficult to travel back and forth just to be with him.

She recalled the day that she gave her innocence to the man.

On that day, Brien put up a front and questioned Yvonne 's sincerity in their relationship because she rarely visited. It compelled her to go to him because she was afraid to create doubts between them.

When Yvonne arrived at his apartment, a heated argument ensued before he demanded to prove her loyalty by giving herself to him.

As blind as she was to the toxic relationship, Yvonne blindly allowed the man to devour her whole. She thought that by giving herself to him, it would seal their relationship, their fate, and her happily ever after.

Sighs of pleasure, happiness and contentment filled her entire being. She became addicted to it that later on, Yvonne began to neglect her internship, her parents' warning, her father's resentment, and worse, her self-worth.

Despite her parent's utter disapproval of their relationship, Yvonne fought for both of them. However, it was a fight that was meant to lose even if she had given it her all. Because it was only herself who was willing to brave the tide against them.