Chapter 2: Either way, Segawa Haruna is somehow indifferent (2-3)

There are two different routes you could take in order to get from the special building to the first, and vice versa.

 

The first route requires you to pass through the bridges that connects the first and special building. They're both found on one end of their second and third floors respectively. While the second route requires you to pass through the second building.

 

Between the two, taking the former would be the more practical choice, considering that you have to circumnavigate the whole school if you chose to take the other path. But for some reason, the certain girl who was treading the path ahead, decided to go with the latter, further prolonging the trip. And like the obidient student I was, I was left with no other choice but to drag my feet along as we continued this compulsory side quest. I couldn't help but sigh with the thought of the impracticality.

 

If it was any other person who was taking the lead here, I would have probably kept my mouth shut through the entirety of the trip and continued walking without a single complaint slipping out of my mouth. There wasn't any point in raising a complaint after all, I'd eventually give in to their flawless reasoning eventually. But sadly, the person in charge wasn't just any other person. She was practically a person whom I was going to spend a whole school year with at most, so starting a small conversation with a life span of about 5 seconds didn't seem that much of a bad choice.

 

"Umm.." I prompted, my resolve wavering. "D-don't you think taking the bridges back there would have made the trip much shorter? Why the hell do we have to take the longer way around..?" 

 

"The bridges you're referring to are usually closed off at this time of day for cleaning. Meaning, we'd have to cross the field to get from one building to the other and climb more stairs to get there and back." She paused, casually glancing over her shoulder. "Do you really intend to get this cute looking girl exposed to afternoon sunlight? And climb a hellish number of stairs while I'm at it You really are one hell of a tyrant if I do say so myself."

 

"Ugh. What the heck was with that blatant display of narcissism just there..I don't see any cute girls here." I averted my eyes.

 

"The second part of your statement wasn't really necessary after having said the first.." She said with an uneasy expression. "Also, I'm not showcasing a severe case of narcissism here, I'm only stating facts."

 

"Nah, no person in the right mind would boldly proclaim something like that..out in the open even." 

 

"Unless you really are cute, then that's an exemption." She paused. "Meaning, I'm an exemption. I'm cute after all." She added with big smile.

 

"Ah, right, right, whatever you say. It's not like my argument would make any change in the course of this world's history after all." I let out a wry sigh, averting my eyes. 

 

"Why did the scale suddenly went up a notch..?"

 

"Beats me."

 

"O-ohh..Is that so." She murmured with a complicated expression, probably unsatisfied with my bland reply. 

 

After that insignificant exchange, we threaded the path of complete silence. Neither of us showed any signs of wanting to start a conversation, nor did either of us seemed interested in doing so. We were both loners after all. Keeping silent was one of the many skills we've obtained through our years of solitude.

 

It was either that or we just both sucked at sparking up a conversation. We were both loners after all. Not knowing how to properly start a conversation was one of the many flaws that we've developed through our years of solitude.

 

I sighed.

 

With that in mind, I decided to turn off all emotions and began to focus on the floor below, freeing myself from obstructive thoughts. After a while, it became fun to watch the cemented floors move back with every step I took. Or rather, it was fun to watch the cemented floor stay put as I moved forward with each step.

 

Only, my eyes began to water after staring too long without blinking even once. How stupid of me. When I rubbed my eyes and lifted my face, my gaze met Segawa's. Meaning, she had been looking at me.

 

"..Umm, what?"

 

"Oh, it's nothing." She evasively replied, furtively averting her eyes.

 

And there was silence once more.

 

Knowing that it was Segawa who was staring just now, I know for a fact that it wasn't just nothing. For what it's worth, she must have been badmouthing me in her head for the past couple of seconds just now. That was the only plausible reason since there wasn't anything commendable about a loner like me in the eyes of other people. But in truth, a loner like me would probably be on king level, just above saint and right below emperor.

 

With all that aside, I decided to continue staring her way in return. And not even ten seconds had passed, she took another quick glance over her shoulder. Only this time, her eyes was immediately met by my intently focused ones, which caused her to flinch ever-so-slightly.  

 

"W-what.." She asked with a passive voice, her face slightly flushed. "I said it was nothing."

 

"Oh, and by that, you meant to say that my very existence was being a bother so you wished that I was merely nothing so you stole a quick glance to check if I was still there, is that it?" I sighed, averting my gaze. "I see, sorry to disappoint I guess." 

 

"W-what was with that creepy self-depreciation just there…I said nothing of the sort as far as I remember." Segawa murmured, a bit taken back.

 

"Well, you made it seem that way is all."

 

"How in the world did the blame suddenly turn to me I wonder.."

 

"Beats me."

 

"O-oh.."

 

And with that, the conversation's life span was about to reach its end. Only, I still wasn't satisfied with the results. So I decided to give the conversation a very expensive full restore to fill it's HP guage to a good hundred percent.

 

"Well, setting that aside," I prompted. "Did you need something?"

 

"O-oh.." She paused, an embarrassed smile playing on her face. "It's nothing, really."

 

Segawa used 'it's nothing really' again; it's super effective. Man, was this girl good at playing this game. She could easily knock a conversation dead with a single move. I couldn't help but sigh with the thought of this games broken system.

 

"That so," I indifferently said, averting my gaze from the person up front. "Well, you know what they say; ask away and be a fool for a moment, never ask and be a fool for life. It really doesn't concern me in the slightest so suit yourself."

 

 

As my words had reached their respective recipient, Segawa stopped in her tracks as she took a deep breath, causing me to suddenly come to a halt as well, leaving only a few inches between me and her. Only, the space in-between would seriously make any guy feel uneasy, so I instinctively moved back a bit.

 

"Uhh..I was just wondering.." She hesitated as she turned my way. "Why someone like you doesn't have any friends..or something. You seem pretty sociable and all."

 

Me? Sociable? That's something I don't hear every day.

 

"W-what makes you say so?"

 

"Even though we just met yesterday, you seem to be able to converse naturally with me and stuff.."

 

"What the hell are you going on about..? Weren't you able to talk normally to me as well?"

 

"The way I talk with others isn't natural in the very least…I think." She paused, fixing her gaze to the windows at the side. "The way I act around others is nothing but a means of survival, it's nothing but a front."

 

As her words made their way out of her very mouth, a self-derisive smile began playing on her face, her eyes getting clouded with each second passing.

 

"I never chose to be this way in the first place." She went on. "I wanted to have a normal high school life like the one everyone else has. The kind that's filled with friends and laughter and stuff like that. I've always been a studious student all the way back to elementary school, so I was naturally thought of as a stuck-up person. I let things be up to my last year of middle school since I thought things would be different once I reached high school. But history ended up repeating itself." She sighed, an unsettling laugh slipping pass her lips. "Haah..why the heck am I even telling you all this."

 

As Segawa finished delivering her part, I was stuck between a rock and a hard place.

 

How should I react in this sorts of situations, I wonder. What was the right thing to say. Should I give out some shallow words of comfort, or deep and honest truths that no one would want to hear. I haven't got the slightest clue whatsoever, I've never really been good at personal relations after all. In fact, I loath this kinds of things.

 

Opening up to someone who doesn't have the power to change a thing has got to be a problem within itself. It's selfish on the sender's side, and conceited on the recipient's. 

 

Sharing your troubles with other people and hoping they'd carry the weight of your burden is basically the same as pushing the impossible on the receiving end. And accepting their burden with meaningless words is nothing but a mean of boosting one's ego; giving false hope to the other end, and fooling yourself with your stupid ideals. 

 

I know for a fact that there was nothing I could possibly do about Segawa's dilemma, I'm not that careless to let that established fact slip pass my shoulder. But leaving things like this would seriously leave a bitter taste in my mouth. I couldn't let things stay as it is. So I'm left with no other choice but to give a reply with something that fits both my conditions and this situation's needs.

 

"Well, how about trying to talk to others by just being yourself. You'll never know if you don't tr-"

 

"That's surprisingly stupid coming from you." She abruptly cut me off, subtle irritation showing on her face. "If I suddenly changed the way I act towards others, they'd begin to think that I'm some sort of weirdo that has some split personality issues."

 

Guh-

 

"L-look here..I'm only trying my best to console you here. So you could at least show me a little bit of restraint." I breathe out a sigh, averting my eyes. "Also, I seriously can't tell if you have that front of yours up or not. Do you even know what a front means?"

 

"O-of course I do, don't take me for an idiot here, stupid." She denied with a sudden turn of the head. A very tsundere-ish way of reacting, if I do say so myself. How uncharacteristic.

 

"Also.." She further went on as she gazed through the window, a small smile naturally began to form through her supple-looking lips. "I somehow feel at ease when I talk with you, so that's probably the reason why I let my guard down from time to time. Maybe it's because I feel like we're somehow the same deep inside." Her words came to a stop as she slowly turned my way, her moist, earnest eyes firmly fixed on mine. 

 

"We're both rotten to the core, it seems."