Chapter 4: Somehow, lunch time is going well (4-2)

The school store tends to be crowded around this time of day. Being the only place that sells food inside the school, students like myself, who didn't have time to whip up food early in the morning, tend to congest at this spot during lunch.

 

That being the case, after being held up by sensei just now, by the time I got there, there weren't enough people left to even call it a crowd. This wasn't Japanese lunch time rush!

 

Likewise, the selection of bread had also gotten sparse, with only melon bread, yakisoba bread, and pork cutlet sandwiches being the only varieties left available. I guess arriving late was a double edged sword.

 

With that, I ended up buying one of each and headed for favorite spot to eat lunch.

 

Being a loner during my first year of high school, lunch time was my most hated time of the day. Aside from morning homeroom.

 

Since I always ate lunch alone inside of the classroom, I tended to stand out more than I should have. That much should have been obvious since most of the class had already formed their own groups, but the first year me was careless enough to let that fact slip past his shoulder.

 

There were even times when students from other classes came to our room just to eat with their friends from our class. I even had my seat taken away one time by some Ichinomiya from class 1-C. I was forced to eat outside by the hall that time. And I probably looked pathetic at that. Screw that Ichinomiya and his group of friends.

 

After a month  of going through that nightmare, I decided to look for a spot to eat in peace. There weren't much places that could fit my conditions, but I eventually stumbled upon the perfect spot.

 

It was somewhere behind the special building, near the storage rooms of the various sports clubs that they always kept locked.

 

The place was usually crawling with students after school, considering that the storage rooms were being utilized at that time of day. But during lunch, it was a completely different story. It was completely dead-quiet and devoid of people. And with the lack of high-rise buildings in the surrounding areas, there was nothing blocking the breeze that tended to blow against the building. It was definitely the perfect spot for solo lunching. Yuru lunch.

 

If someone were to find out about my special lunching spot, I wouldn't hesitate to get my hands covered with blood. Though, as I slowly closed in on my usual spot, I could vaguely see someone sitting from afar.

 

As I began to come up with a five-stage plan on how to get away with murder, the face of the person slowly came into view. It was someone that I knew.

 

With her skirt neatly tucked beneath her captivating legs, she sat below the shade of the special building's roof, hugging her knees as she sipped through the straw of her small-sized juice box. Her short, silk-like hair swayed along with the breeze, with her eyes firmly glued to some far away land.

 

At that point, my murderous intent was thoroughly drained out of my system. And the feeling of unease was replaced by confusion. What the heck is this person doing here..

 

By the time I got close to the person in question, I stood there for a while without uttering a word. But seeing as though my existence was being ignored, I decided to speak up in a reserved manner.

 

"Umm, what are you doing here?"

 

"Oh, long time no see," Segawa turned to me with a casual look, her face showing no signs of surprise whatsoever. "How many years has it been, three days? Though, your face is still the same as far as I remember, so could you please comeback after another ten years?"

 

She finished it off with a tilt of the head, a genuine puzzled expression plastered on her face. No, I could say the same for you. Three days and still as blunt as ever.

 

"That's one hell of a greeting you got there. I wouldn't be surprised if you still greeted people like that ten years from now." I answered back as I sat to her right, leaving a proper distance in between. "Also, appearances don't change in a span of three days."

 

It would take about four depending on your peers.

 

"True. Though, in ten years time, I'm sure it'd be the other way around. People rarely change even after a long time after all." She added with a sigh as she sipped from her juice box.

 

I wasn't too sure what that was just now, but I couldn't careless about the minor details. For now, there was still one thing that needed to be answered, so  I asked once again to get my questioned cleared.

 

"So, why are you here again?"

 

Her grip on her juice box inadvertently flinched, looking the other way with slightly flushed cheeks. "Ah, well..I wanted to get your opinion on something, I guess."  

 

"My opinion huh," I took a short pause as I peeked inside my bag of bread, then decided to pull out the melon bread reflexively. "I don't think my opinion would be any relevant though. I might not look like it, but I'm not really good at that kind of stuff."

 

"I see you also acknowledge your own weakness," She wearily replied with an uneasy smile. "I don't dislike that though."

 

"Oh, what a coincidence. I don't dislike it either." I answered back with a smile of my own. "Besides, casting your own weakness aside is nothing but a form of hypocrisy. You have no right to judge others' weaknesses if you turn a blind eye to your own. By the way, I just happen to have a bad habit of looking into other people's weakness. And I don't intend to have my rights removed just yet."

 

"That's a weird way to put it." Segawa added with a weary laugh. "I might have actually thought highly of you if it wasn't for that last part."

 

"Well, I'm not really fit to be highly regarded of," I took the melon bread and casually handed it to over to her. She adamantly refused as she waved her hand around.

 

"It's fine, I still have some juice left."

 

"No..well, there aren't any trash bins in the area,"

 

"Eh? So?"

 

Segawa tilted her head in question. I might have also done the same if I were in her shoes. I wasn't really used to this kind of exchange, so I might have stumbled on my words and blurted out something completely vague. Good job, me.

 

"Ah, well, it doesn't seem like you've eaten lunch yet..is what I'm trying to say." I timidly replied, averting my gaze. "There aren't any trash bins in the area, so if you've bought something from the school store, you'd still have some plastic lying around. And it doesn't seem like you've brought a packed lunch either."

 

"Ehh..I'm surprised at how perceptive you are." Segawa blurted out in an astonished tone, then quickly looked away with a sway of her hair. "Well, it's somewhere along those lines. I kind of got short on this month's allowance, so this was all I could afford for today. But I'm not much of a heavy eater, so this much could probably suffice."

 

"No, but still, eating is important you know."

 

"I..I know, you don't have to tell me." She cast her gaze down as she mumbled those words, staring at the ground with lightly flushed ears. "It's just, I kind of dislike the idea of being indebted to someone, I guess."

 

From the way she said it, I could more or less tell she has some sort of experience to back those words up.

 

Well, being indebted to others was indeed a hassle. You wouldn't really know when you've already paid your dept as they keep bringing it up whenever it's convenient, and just the feeling itsef was really unsettling. I almost ended up being a slave because of that, even though I've already returned the favor once before. Rather than saying debt was a hassle, I guess it's more correct to say that human relationships were the real perpetrator.  

 

"You don't have to worry about it. I got held up by Yasuhara-sensei just now, so I don't have much time to finish all of this. I ended up buying way too many out of habit."

 

"I-is that so.." She reluctantly turned her face in my direction, looking at the bread in a reserved manner. "Umm, are you sure you don't mind?"

 

"I'm clearly handing it over aren't I..?" I ended up replying with an irritated tone. "My arm's going numb so could you just take it already?"

 

"Ah, r-right.." She quickly took the bread in a fluster, a bashful expression plastered on her face. "T-thanks for the bread."

 

I nodded my head, wordlessly. To which she served as the signal to unpack the bread. She began eating away in her own leisure.

 

As I watched her start eating from the corner of my eye, a realization suddenly hit me.

 

"By the way, what did you want to ask me about again?"

 

"Ah, that's," She turned to me as she gulped down her food. "What's with the sudden change of heart? I remember you saying your opinion was irrelevant."

 

True, I did say that just now. But if she'd gone through the trouble of meeting me here, it was probably something that she couldn't ask just anybody about. And it wasn't everyday that I was relied on, so I guess giving it a shot wouldn't hurt too much.

 

"Well, you could say I got curious that it sparked my motivation...or something like that."

 

"Oh.." Segawa paused. "Curiosity killed the cat though."

 

"L-leave me be. I'm already going to help you out so cut me some slack."

 

"Haa..right, right," She said so with a smile as she sipped from her juice box, then began to speak in succession. "It's actually about Sanae-san. I met her this morning on my way to school, and she asked me if we could eat lunch together. Of course, being the way that I am, I couldn't give a proper response after being asked so suddenly. I was only able to answer with 'I'll think about it', and that was it. I tend to think things over so it might take me a while, but keeping her waiting too long would be discourteous. So I was kind of hoping to get the opinion of her childhood friend."

 

…Oh, I don't see how being a childhood friend ties into this though.

 

Still, just over the span of a weekend, I see that Sanae's already trying to close in on Segawa. I got to hand it to her. She wasn't everyone's friend for no reason. And wait, was she really called by that or was it just me?

 

"Why not humor her? You also seem to be interested anyway."

 

"Well, of course I've already considered that option. She was the one who approached me first after all. But still.."

 

"Still?"

 

"I was wondering if it could somehow work out, I guess." Segawa paused as she stared at the ground, a silent sigh slipping past her lips. "I seriously don't understand how people think, and I have no clue as to how human relationships work, so I don't know how to conduct myself in those kinds of situations. I've always distanced myself from other people, that I ended up forgetting how to properly interact somewhere along the way. Because of that, I'm still having some doubts if…I could really get along with Sanae-san or not."

 

A gift.

 

If I remember it correctly, that's what I called it earlier on. Though, even if you asked anyone in regards to the topic, I'm sure they'd also see it in the exact same light. However, after hearing the side of the person in question, the things that sensei had told me began to show its true colors.

 

What this girl has, aware of it or not, was far from what one would consider as a gift.

 

Being called stuck-up for being a cut above the rest, both in terms of smarts and overall looks, she was cast to the side by her former surroundings, ostracized by the people in her former environment. No, rather than ostracized, she was given no other choice but to exclude herself from the picture. She was forced into isolation out of others' ill will.

 

It might seem irrational from others' perspectives, but in order to preserve ones sense of self-worth, that was probably the best a middle schooler could think of. I can't really blame her for having any doubts.

 

Though, hypothetically speaking, if there was truly anyone in this world who would generously grant someone the life that had been taken away from them, someone who would mindlessly make the first move, someone who would gently extend their hand forward, then, then..

 

"I don't think someone like that could actually be bad." I averted my eyes with a silent sigh, fixing my gaze to the empty grounds. "If she bothered to approach you and invite you for lunch, I think her intentions are nothing but good. It's Sanae we're talking about here after all. There's no way she'd have an ill intentions. Also, she might not seem like it, but Sanae's quite flexible when it comes to people. I'm sure you'd be able to get along with her without doing much yourself."

 

"Ehh.." Segawa murmured in a monotonous tone, taking a  bite off her melon bread. "I can see that you're speaking from recent experience. You two made up just recently after all."  

 

"Geh-" Having something completely unexpected thrown at me just now, I inadvertently flinched as I slowly turned to her. "D-did you hear that from her?"

 

"Obviously. Who else could I have heard that from?" She finished her bread as she answered me back, then finished it off by sipping her juice box dry.

 

That girl..spreading insignificant news like that for no particular reason. You'll get sued for false accusation someday if you keep that up.

 

"I-it's not like I'm friends with her or anything like that. We just agreed on talking every now and then..is all"

 

"Well, I could tell about that much. I don't see you becoming friends with anyone anytime soon."

 

"T-that so.." I reflexively looked away with a self-derisive smile, then further went on in a low voice. "I seriously don't know how I should feel about that.."

 

Segawa merely gave a smile as she shrugged in response, then slowly stood up as she dusted her skirt. It was then when something unexpected came out of her mouth.   

 

"Though if it were you and me, I'm sure it'd work out."

 

Her soft, feeble voice briefly lingered in the air, but quickly trailed off with a sudden gust of wind. Her words were soft-spoken that it could hardly be heard. And it was as if she had intended it to stay that way. But weird enough, they clearly resounded through my own two ears. 

 

I wasn't too sure if what I heard was correct. It seemed too out of place and was very unlikely, that my doubts began to eat me away.

 

To confirm if my ears weren't the ones in the wrong, I reluctantly looked up in Segawa's direction, only to be welcomed by her earnest gaze.

 

"Though, that's merely a thought. I feel like it wouldn't play out too well in reality after all." She further went on as she broke into a smile; a wide, broad smile that was seemingly teasing, but at the same time, a smile that wasn't hiding any lies. It left me with some mixed emotions that I had troubles answering back.

 

"I-I see," My head instantly dropped as I mumbled those words. "...Why do feel like I just got rejected without even saying a word?" 

 

Is this supposed to be some sort of new torture method? Seriously..if I've ever experienced something like this back in middle school, then I'm pretty sure I might have already given up on the world and had been under persistent pursuit of the NHK.

 

"Well that's that, I'll be taking my leave." She lightly bowed her head with her plastered smile, then continued her words with her back already turned. "Thanks for the advice and..the bread just now. I'll still give it some thoughts, but I might just take Sanae-san up on her offer."

 

"Oh, sounds good to me."

 

"Yes." Segawa replied as she began to move ahead. Though, with only a couple of paces in between, her legs seemed to have stopped as she glanced over her shoulder. "A-also, see you in the clubroom."

 

The way she turned her head seemed somehow reluctant, and the way she that she spoke felt as if she was having second thoughts. I couldn't really blame her because there was completely no need to add those last few words in. But she still went her way just to say them regardless.

 

I wordlessly replied with a cock of the head, along with a smile that had formed without me noticing. She then turned away as she went her way.

 

As the sight of her back had gone with a right turn, I took my phone out to take a look at the time.

 

There was roughly around four minutes left before fifth period starts.

 

...Why didn't she just wait until after school?