The Perfectionist and Genius BigBird
Atop a vast continent lied a flourishing steep hill. On the hill was a cliff, on the cliff was a tree, on the tree was a nest and on the nest were some eggs.
Crack… … …
Sounds of cracking resounded in the air amidst the fierce gale winds blowing over the place. The series of cracking did not last long though, as four heads popped out of the shell and merrily jogged out in the nest.
"My dearest brother, my dearest sister, my…"
"Oh my ghost! We are not a deer!" Cried the last chick to poke his head out of the eggshell.
The nest made of straws, feathers and beast skins was like a turf grass landscaped on a golf course. The chicks' sensitive claws were as if they were being massaged and tickled by thousands of Gaffa rufa fishes withering all their sores and aches after the long slumber.
It was very comfortable!
The four chicks hopped and rolled in the wide comfy nest. Their eyes gazed into the surrounding towering trees until they noticed a plump egg wriggling beside them.
Confusion rose in the hearts of the chicks. They warily looked at the conspicuous egg, the size of a rugby ball, staying intact despite the fact that time for their incubation was already over.
"Is there a stupid creature inside the egg?" The chicks wondered.
***
Jospeh's eyes were rolling round and round examining his surroundings. The idea of living in a milky white room covered with a delicate thin sac was very startling to him. He who have been living a beggary life since birth and staying in a house made of boards and scrap materials never imagined that he would be able to chance such luxurious life.
"I'm a bird… I'm a bird… I'm a bird… I am big big Bird!"
BigBird hummed. His head rocked left and right as his claws carefully wave back and forth so as not to break his precious room.
Crack… kak… kak..
BigBird was surprised. The roof of his egghome began to crack. Feelings of depression and anxiety welled up from the bottom of his heart as he willed his curled body to stood still so as to delay the onset of the upcoming disaster.
"Noooooo!" His brain cells madly shouted in revolt.
Few seconds later, the fissures on the egg walls started to spread. Rays of light began penetrating inside the shell like a laser of a sniper rifle searching for its target. All of BigBird's hairs stood up in fright as the intense rocking and breaking akin to a magnitude 10 earthquake befall upon him. He was feeling helpless and at loss on what to do.
"Brother!!! Help!!!" He heard two panic-stricken voices, a hoarse and a thin-delicate one, asking for his aid as his eyes fell on his own body and examined the majestic feathers carved on his tummy and wings.
"Oh. My body is so so perfect!" BigBird appraised in delight. His eyes gleamed with satisfaction and his beak grinned wide open. It was only when the shell broke apart, like a lotus flower opening in full bloom, that BigBird remembered his fear. He poked his head out of the shell until his gaze landed on his two weeping siblings.
"Uglies," BigBird rolled his eyes in disgust. His fear vanished upon realizing that it was his siblings who broke the shell while it was the fierce wind rocking the nest.
With the frail body of a chick, he stood up majestically. It didn't take long before he got accustomed to his bird body, so he tried stepping his right foot out of the broken shell. Amidst the cry and plea of his siblings, BigBird took no notice of the red exclamation mark flickering on the lower right of his periphery.
[Emergency quest: Rescue mission. Newborn chicks are both naughty and nice. With their idiot brother cozily sleeping in his egg, the brothers and sisters staged a welcoming play, but a wardrobe malfunction caused two of the chicks' feathers to get stuck in the nest. As your family members are in peril, prevent an accident to happen in the two chicks.]
Quest reward: +50XP, energizer worm
Quest failure penalty: ???
Thrill and excitement replaced BigBird's fears when he noticed the suspended quest issued by his crying siblings.
"Great! BigBird's adventure begins here!" He yelled on top of his lungs as he dragged his other foot outside of the shell.
Swoosh!!!
BigBird stretched his right wing to welcome the gentle breeze of the fierce winds blowing on the hilltop. He raised his head up high to bathe in the fresh sunlight tanning his creamy white skin.
"My wings are the brightest! My beak is the sharpest! My claws are the fiercest! BigBird is the best!" A gleeful chant was recited by the genius bird despite the crying background of the two eaglets.
Swoosh!!!
BigBird stretched his other wing. However, he seemed to feel a huge pressure of wind pushing against his will.
"Che! Stupid wind!" BigBird steeled himself. He drove his left wing against the pressure pushing back the winds that prevent his wing from opening.
"Aahhh!!!"
"Wu wu wu…"
Screams and sobs resounded in BigBird's ear. With the King of Prey's demeanor, he stared dumbfounded on his idiot brother and sister who knows nothing but crying.
"Tch! Idiots!" BigBird sneered.
As a perfectionist and genius beggar, Joseph decided to check first his status to gauge his strengths and weaknesses before proceeding the quest.
Name: BigBird
Species: Harpy Eagle (Harpia harpyja)
Species Hierarchal Ranking: Kappa (κ)
Ranking Coefficient: 15th tier class beast
Specialization: None
Title: None
Level: 1
Health Points (HP): 307
Mana Points (MP): 121
Stamina Points (SP): 163
Attack: 56~74
Defense: 15
Strength: 13
Intelligence: 9
Dexterity: 13
Vitality: 15
Fame: 0
Slaughter Points: 0
Contribution: 0
Skills: None
Feeling astonished, BigBird smirked with his handsome beak flattened wide while glaring badly at the crying idiots.
"Hmph!" BigBird humped when a series of notification sounded right after he closed his status window.
'Emergency mission failed. Two of your siblings accidentally fell down the cliff. Possibility of dying easily is low.'
Ding!
A video played in front of Joseph.
Two eaglets whose feathers were initially stuck on the nest above a giant parasol tree, were struggling to break free. Moments later, a wing sneakily slapped their faces hard. They tried everything they can to struggle but the assailant was too strong for them. Helplessness and defeat could be seen in their eyes until… they fell.
Whoosh…
BAM!!!
The lucky eaglets' heads accidentally bumped into a twig. They were stunned for a few milliseconds but easily snapped out of their daze performing a perfect somersault in the air.
Tenteneneeennn... You got a perfect score: 100!
Swish…
The eaglets regained their balance and had their claws hold tightly on the branch.
The two blessed creatures heaved a sigh of relief for the foothold they landed on was firm. But unaware of their surroundings, a nest of bees was accidentally enraged by the disturbance caused by a twig poking their nest.
Unknown to the two chicks, a branch was originally carried by the fierce wind when they chanced to land on it. The flying stick then accidentally poked a beehive with the combined force of the wind and the eaglets' might. The queen inside the meeting room with several of her elders, was accidentally killed — HEADSHOT!
Driven by anger, the bees, the size of a baby's head, rushed toward the innocent siblings, stinging every part of their frail bodies. The foot-long stinger left by the bees made the duo looked like a plump swollen pufferfish with wings.
The tragic misfortune of the two chicks didn't end there. As their bodies began swelling due to the bee stings and toxic poisons in their bodies, their firm and steady foothold suddenly broke before they fell down the edge of the cliff again.
Two hunters were passing by. After praying for a bountiful harvest, they were elated to see two porcupine-looking creature struggling to fly. The middle-aged blond man skillfully unleashed two bolts of lightning fast arrows precisely aimed at their wings. The pitiful birds drifted down the air like a plane crashing due engine malfunction, resulting to a bad fall that almost claimed their lives. The eaglets' claws scratched the surface of a big reddish rock before they fell once again on the forest hundreds of meters below the cliff.
Fall, roll, stumble, roll...
Tenteneneeennn... PERFECT!
Luckily, the two pitiful creatures maintained their lives. Hardworking as they may be, the chicks stood upright to scout for potential dangers.
"We fight for life! We will not die," reassured the older eaglet to the other one.
In a nearby swamp, a swarm of 15 pregnant mosquitoes were fervently searching for food. The hyperopic far-sighted scout of the platoon hastily returned to their base to report her sighting of two plumps of walking meat 1,000 meters away from their campsite.
Sluuurp!
The mosquitoes feasted on the two porcupine-like creatures draining 2HP before fainting and getting poisoned to death.
"Lucky!" BigBird inwardly cheered as he watched the replay of his siblings' demise. He was truly thankful that the eaglets were poisoned else, they might get sucked to death.
The two haggard creatures, feeble but still alive, struggled to walk searching for a safe place to stay. On their way to safety, they met several hungry blood-sucking bugs and animals which were also luckily poisoned to death.
Leeches…
Triatoma...
Stable fly...
Assassin bug...
Vampire bats...
The road they took became a procession of poisoned corpses. The health points of the two heart-breaking creatures slowly drained until they stopped at one.
Ha… ha… ha…
Panting, the duo continued to struggle.
5 meters… 4… 3… 2… 1…
A single step. The poor little eagles only needed a single step to enter an uninhabited cave and recover inside. However, their destiny seemed to be doomed for eternity as they met their creator with that last single step.
Blag!!!
BigBird's siblings finally died. A still brown broken branch was seen near the two corpses.
Sadly, the duo tripped over the same wooden branch that initially saved their life.
Had the two eaglets been aware of how they will die, they would rather wish to die an easy death than being played by a non-living branch. The branch, rather being the branch of life, was the renowned branch of death in myth.
"Idiot brother! Idiot sister! F*cking branch! F*cking...! Arghhh!"
BigBird shouted once the scenario was finished. From the wind to the stone, BigBird cursed all the elements that caused his siblings' death.
[Your failure leads to a tragedy worse than immediate death. Quest penalty: (Heavy) Species downgrade, orphan status]
'Devolution successful. Pro-FILE updated.'
Name: BigBird
Species: Lowlife Chicken (Gallus gallus domesticus)
Species Hierarchal Ranking: Omega (ω)
Ranking Coefficient: 24th tier class beast
Specialization: None
Title: None
Level: 1
HP: 212
MP: 81
SP: 92
Attack: 8~17
Defense: 8
Strength: 12
Intelligence: 7
Dexterity: 11
Vitality: 10
Fame: 0
Slaughter Points: 4
Contribution: 0
Skills: None
A brief cutscene once again flashed. A stunning alpha eagle was carrying an egg. The white rounded egg was the spoil she got from a family of lowly avian species she hunted while going home. The family of six were now currently residing in her stomach.
"Idiot chicken!" Haughtily exclaimed the two eaglets Joseph regarded as 'idiot' earlier. Shivers ran down his spine right after he felt some burning sensations, not only on his scalp but also on the different body parts where his elegant feathers were attached. He almost vomited a spoonful of blood when he saw his classy feathers withering and replaced by the fluffy dark quills and a reddish comb growing atop his head.
"Dammit!" BigBird felt a heavy blow from his behind. He ran away without looking back, swearing that in due time, he will have his revenge for the death of his real family.
Overlooking the distant horizon beneath the hill, Joseph the BigBird made a vow to the heavens, "I'm the chicken above the clouds! The ruler of the uniBirds! I'm the best chick of the world!"
BigBird left and travelled to the nearby forest.
No pain, no gain. It was the start of the adventure of a mundane puny creature in the vast continent of Pangaea.
'You have obtained a title: The One That Got Away'
***
Jiggy was strolling in the village searching for the Adventurer's guild. On the way, he had accomplished some easy delivery and search quests gaining quite a sum of experience points and a bit of copper coins.
[Harry Water's Station: Deliver two gallons of water to Sophie's store.]
Reward: +7XP, 2cu, bottled water x1
[Harry Potter's Ceramics: Search the lost saucer stone.]
Reward: +3XP, 3cu, earthen mugs x2
[Hairy Father's Barber Shop: Sweep the floor.]
Reward: +4XP, 4cu, wishing hairs x3
[Ma Ling's Restaurant: Deliver hot and cold dishes to Mayor Isko.]
Reward: +4XP, 4cu, fried luncheon meat x1
[Jay Law's Auditing Firm: Searching for Documents…]
Reward: +3XP, 15cu
[Justin Big Bear's Lottery: Assist in…]
Reward: +6XP, 6cu, lottery ticket x2
…
After doing some menial jobs, Jiggy's XP bar was at 35% while his total coins in the inventory amounted to 59 coppers. In his backpack were various items like comb, matchsticks, fireworks, lottery tickets, traps and many others in which the function and uses were basically absurd.
Matchstick: an item used to cure sleepiness.
Instruction for use: Open your eyes wide and prop with the matchsticks to avoid closing. If not effective, ignite the matchsticks and burn yourself.
Precautions for use: May cause arson if not used correctly.
Wishing hair: Hairy father's eyelash used for wishing. Whether your wish comes true or not, don't blame others.
Instruction for use: Put the hair in between your thumb and point finger. Close your eyes, make a wish and chant "Hairy father thou art a barber…" Before opening your eyes, guess where the hair will stick (in your thumb or in your point finger) and then release your finger. If you guess it wrong, your wish has a low chance of becoming true. If you guess it right, your wish may still not come true.
Precautions for use: May cause irritation or teary eyes when not used correctly.
Lottery ticket: Justin Big Bear's number game. Whether you win or not, most probably you will lose.
Instructions for use: Scratch the boxes. If you uncover the same number written at the back of the card, you may claim your winnings from the different outlets nationwide.
Precautions for use: Small chance of winning (1/1,234,567,890). Please visit the store again to buy a pot containing small amount of luck — potluck.
…
While examining his loots and gains, Jiggy finally arrived near an ostentatious large wooden cabin surrounded by topiaries of adventurers wielding different weapons. The Adventurer's Guild.