Laide is a very kind and ordinary girl who currently works at Pancho's Cafe near the School campus. She's working tons of part time jobs to feed herself and to have a lot of extra income to pay her tuition fee. 

One day, A guy named Cole entered the cafe and Laide felt that this person had a lot of hard times this past few days. Without hesitating, she slowly sat in front of him and gave him a tape and left quickly. The guys seems surprise of what she did and hold the tape, he looks for her but she's already gone.

Love on Fire

ROMANCE

"dumb clever"? these are contradictory words, mutually exclusive of each other, this is an "oxymoron", which is considered a mistake in the writing.

Pity your whole life? Due to payment? How part time? It looks at least not entirely clear. Since even with secondary education, it is quite possible to find a good job, provided that the country is certainly not a dictatorship and it is a capitalist country.

Who is Cole? Who is Victoria? Almost nothing is said about them, and Cole generally appears out of nowhere.

It is interesting, if it is a modern culture, then whoever wants to meet with that, since morality, they say in the modern world is already archaism? Then why is someone Cole crying? Weird! So all the same, modern culture is not alien to morality? Offtopic. It was just such a topic recently in the forum, I remembered.

Of course women are impulsive, emotional, but what about work? Was she just released? No one said anything?

Who is Laida? I guess the main character? But then it was necessary to say so at first, otherwise the reader has to wonder what kind of new characters are appearing, who are they? What do they have to do with history?

It seems the plot is developing too fast, important points are skipped ... it does not look natural.

Cafe Pancho where does it? What kind of cafe is this? Will it still appear in this story?

Refusal of responsibility - it is better to put it in the synopsis or in
Auxiliary Chapters. But at the same time, this does not guarantee that you will not be stolen. Just for fun, type in Google the name of your novel, chapters in 20 and with a high degree of probability you will see that someone has already duplicated your novel on two or even three sites ...

And here it is not clear. One chapter is long and the other is completely short.

In two chapters it’s difficult to judge a novel, but it’s clear that this is a romatic. Youth history, first love, first betrayals and people still do not fully understand themselves. The novel seemed damp. Rated 4.2 stars.

The author try, do not forget about the emotions of the characters.