A Chance

"A second round?" I burst out laughing. "What are we, thirteen?"

I should've been offended by his comments on my private life and my past relationship, more so with what he thought was best for it. But admittedly, I wasn't, because for one, I did feel like he meant no disrespect. Secondly, I agreed with his conclusion. I knew too little about Matt to actually say what we had was the kind of relationship that would last.

Mattheus spent last Christmas with me in Tarlac. It was the day I received my very first text message from him since meeting him three weeks before. He asked that I picked him up at Motorway, the Tarlac bus stop, and I did, because Zach was too drunk to get up that morning.

At lunch, which we held at the compound pavilion with all my titos and titas, my cousins and our Nanay and Tatay (our grandparents), Mom and Dad asked me straight up if he was my boyfriend.

Zach had the more violent reaction to the question. "Geez! Matt's here to visit me, not Zoey," he said, and I remained quiet.

I didn't tell Zach that an hour before lunch, Matt sat with me at the swing, while I read my book. He confessed that he liked me, careful so Zach wouldn't hear. That should have made me uneasy since his confession came too quickly. But it didn't. In fact, I felt comfortable around Matt. Like I was attracted enough to make myself believe that he was the one to save me from being broken by Scott.

Zach got mad at me, of course, when he learned of it days later. I tried to deny it at first, but he insisted there was something special about the way Matt looked at me and so that couldn't have been nothing.

"I don't want to talk about anything that isn't happening!" I said.

"Then let's talk about something that's not gonna happen. You are not gonna date Mattheus and you are not gonna do anything that has something to do with him!" Zach said, taking a step towards me with each passing NOT of his threat.

Of course, I didn't tell Zach I still went out with Matt in secret after the New Year. We watched movies, which was always my choice. We went for coffee and fine dining, but we were always talking about Zach and Geo, our twins, and about stuff that didn't really directly concern us. It was for this reason that I sometimes felt like I knew more about Geo than I did him.

I was contented with that setup. Matt was taking measures in ensuring that I didn't get into trouble with Zach and he appreciated every effort I did just to be with him. But on Valentine's Day, he brought me to a five-star hotel. I knew what he wanted to happen. With the champagne and the roses and the chocolates, it wasn't really that hard to guess. So I got mad at him, and things came out wrong when we said them, and we ended the most romantic day of the year with a big bad breakup.

That hurt. That hurt a lot. I actually thought he was going to try and patch it up then and there, say he was sorry and do something to appease me, but he didn't. He sat on the hotel bed, his face on his palms and was really quiet. I ran out and he never followed me.

"So, how about it?" Geo broke through my thoughts, taking me back to my now. He leaned against the tree trunk and crossed his arms by his chest.

Tempting. This was really tempting. Was it the right thing to do?

"My brother said that second round thing is a great idea," he added, as if for good measure.

I'll be damned. The lady side of me was already rejoicing. The responsible side of me was pulling me back to reality. Something like this would only distract Geo and me from completing the photo wall. And it would anger my brother even more.

"So what is this? Detention with a job on the side? What the hell is wrong with you? Aren't you at all concerned about the photo wall?" I turned on my heel and began to walk away. This conversation had to be over while I was sane. Any more would make me fall on my knees. And I didn't want to beg.

"Look at it this way: you'll be more inspired," he yelled at me. He wasn't following.

"Let me think about it." I didn't wait for him to answer. Nothing he would say could make me stay anyway.

I headed straight to the Reagan dorms. I needed to chill. This was getting way out of hand. My lady side was getting way out of hand. And I knew it for certain, because even before I could enter our dorm building, I turned back and headed to the soccer field.