Dear Diary

When my little sister was killed brutally, I was only twenty and was saved by the grace and i was born again. I thank the pastor who showed me the right path of life! Life is more precious than getting drunk. God loves us all.

I happened to ask him a question that was haunting me.

"Pastor would God forgive me for going astray?"

He said "Son God knew you from the very beginning of your life, he loves you, and the situation you faced was already there!"

"Hold on! Man of God! Just stop right there! How is it possible that my God! My creator would let a terrible thing happen to me and my family, how can he let us go through this situation?" what he said angered me. It pushed me to another position of which I don't like.

"Listen son!" he said "I can see your frustrations, but listen to me and focus on each and every word that I'm going to tell you!" I sat down and tried to be calm. "God trusts you! He brought you to this situation with a purpose; he knows that you are stronger than you think you are! Remember Gideon from the bible? The Angel came to his hiding place, were he was terrified but the Angel spoke to him and said 'strong soldier' son you are strong and you can beat this, God will never give you a heavy load that will be too much for your shoulders to carry!"

"Its heavy pastor, I can't handle this load!" I cried. I seemed to be taking it hard than everyone, but mom and dad became strong for Musa and I.

I couldn't move on, but with the help of this Man of God, God has sent, I managed to get my life back on track and aimed for the best.

Life is worth living, God knows each and every one of us in this entire universe as David the Psalmist had spoken 'You examine me each day when I'm asleep at night, you know me very well'

I wanted to share this testimonial just for a little bit before I could carry on and share my story of my quest on finding my women on how life was as a young adult.

I got up and washed up, my neck was killing me, and I had my late breakfast and decided to check on Lindy's car. I went to check for it outside but it wasn't there, I panicked I didn't know what to do, I rushed upstairs to get my phone and remembered that there's a landline phone on the house going to my room would be a waste of time! I dialed my father's cell phone numbers, he's the only one who knew about cars because mom wouldn't answer me even though I would ask, as for Moos his at school I shouldn't bother him.

I dialed his cell phone numbers because if I would call him from the office, that receptionist of him, Ms. Pretty would ask me to briefly explain myself and give her every single detail of myself.

"Pops pops!"

"Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Slow down and take a deep breath and tell me what's going on." dad was relaxed over the phone.

"Pops last night there was a car here a white Corolla Etude and I don't see it now!"

"Oh! So that's the reason you are calling? And you can't seem to breathe properly huh?"

"Father, please stop playing games, and please do tell me if you know where the car is or you've seen it! Please!"

"Check it on the garage you'll find it there."

"How did you manage to put it there?"

"I called the breakdown truck to pull it in… I didn't know that you would be absent from varsity today… the car would have be burnt by the scorching heat of the sun if it was to be left outside."

"Oh! Yeah am sorry pops I over slept I just got up… and thank you for what you did, I appreciate it!"

"It's alright so is there anything else?"

"No there's nothing more"

"Good then… allow me to carry on with my work. "

"Yes Dad,"

"And before you hang up, please remember this, don't try to be something that you are not, be yourself no matter what, you hear me?"

I took all my attention and went to check on the car, checked the respirators everything seemed fine. I am an African child, we do believe that sometimes, when you mention the dead or kind of mention their names you are bringing them or inviting them to life! So there's no explanation about Lindy's car it seemed fine. Perhaps, Lungi didn't want her to leave here yesterday. Maybe she wanted her to stay over, I wouldn't know. I spent time trying to figure it out, what was the problem with it, got inside the car, and did not bother to start the engine. Musa came back early from school. I was still seated inside the car. And i happened to find her diary book, all good and bad things that happened to her. I don't know why girls do this, writing every single thing about their private life on this little book. Look at it now; it has landed on the wrong hands. What was written in it was private information so I'll share it with you; I'll just read where I happened to page up.

"Dear diary it's almost four months since I've started dating V.J I'm starting to lose my patience with him he is my first love, but I don't know if I'm supposed to feel like this! He never calls, he only text's me, I don't know if my mind is playing tricks with me. I suspect that maybe he has got himself a new girlfriend; I don't know maybe I should stop calling him; I'm becoming a noisy mosquito, his no longer interested in me. Perhaps I shouldn't keep my hopes up, busy hoping that he might come around. I would understand if he was on a training camp, training to become a soldier, but no! He was a good guy when we first met but ever since I denied having sex with him before marriage he started to act strange…" I was still reading but Musa bang the roof top of the car!

"Bang ha… ha… you are frightened… Jesus J.R what are you doing." He exclaimed.

"Jesus Moos are you crazy? You almost gave me a heart attack!" I closed the diary trying to hide it from Musa.

"You should be scared, why are you reading other people's privacy?" he snatched the diary out of my hands.

"What are you doing?" I stormed out of the car.

"Wait! Don't come any closer or I'll tell her that I saw you reading it!"

"No! You wouldn't do that… you wouldn't sabotage your brother like that!" I lifted my hands surrendering from his threat.

"Of course I would, have you forgotten whom you are making a deal with?"

"Whatever man," I got under the car to check if it wasn't leaking any oil, and boom! It was leaking oil.

"Since when have you become a mechanic?" he asked.

"Since I got a crush on a miserable girl,"

"Huh! Miserable, why do you say she's miserable, she doesn't look miserable to me?"

"It's written on the diary."

"What?"

"Yeah I now know that his current boyfriend doesn't afford to put a smile on her face, but I can."

"Are you serious?" he asked, his voice was full of excitement.

"Yes! It's written in blue and white, just right there"

"Wow! So um… you are going to use that in your advantage?"

"Yep, I'm going to use my charms to win her love."

"That's great news and I have to admit it, that Lindy girl is so fine brother, you surely do have a taste, just like pops." he complemented.

"Yeah, she is one fine girl… please grab the oil and pour it!"

"What page were you reading again?"

"Ha… ha… so you also want to page up 'people's privacy' huh?"

"Come on JR I also have to use it on my advantage."

"Yeah, yeah,"

"Like really now, you gave me an assignment, a task to help you get this girl, but now you are not helping… come on man you are not helping at all."

"I don't know what page it is, I just opened and read the page."

"Ok let me do the same then, maybe I'll get something better too," he said "Wow did you knew her birthday?"

"No why?"

"She was born on the nineteenth of July…"

"Ok now I know when her birthday is, so what's her birthday wish this year then?"

"… I was about to read that but you chose to speak upfront!"

"Ok I'm sorry… please read."

"Ok! 'dear diary, on my birthday I wish that when it reaches, I would have found myself a new man, I wish that the new man could adore me and take me out to dinner on my birthday and probably take me to dine in at Ushaka Marine World, get to order my favorite sea food. I wish that he could propose on my birthday,' Moos even changed his voice tone and tried to imitate her voice… 'If am not taken out on a date to Ushaka Marine World, I wish I could get…' the buzzer went on at the gate and rang. Musa looked from the intercom to check who it was and it was Lindy.

"Who's at the gate?" I asked.

"Your girlfriend," I have not tightened the leaking pipe, the oil sprayed my face, I moved from the position of the pipe.

"Hey carry on… I could get what?"

"Man never mind that are you ok?"

"Yes I'm ok! Just finish the line would you!" I yelled.

"… 'Get married on my birthday'… are you happy now?"

"Yes… I am so does that…" the buzzer went on again.

"I'm going to open up for her and where did you take the diary from?"

"Put it under the car sit… hurry!"

"Ok! But are you sure it was there?"

"Just put it already… you are making me to be more nervous!"

"Hi Lindy, please come on in, we are at the garage!"

"Ok thanks!"

She got into the gate, came to the garage. She looked so lovely, as she always does; you know beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.

"Oh hello Moos… how are you today?" she asked.

"Am all good tomato sauce," Musa shrugged his shoulders, with his hands tucked in to his pants.

"Ha... ha… ha you are very funny."

"Yeah, what can I say?"

"Look I'm sorry about yesterday…" Musa cleared his throat.