By His Side

I shake my head, "It doesn't matter, if Angel died because of me, I could never live with myself. I need to know if he's okay before i go and worry about myself… so please… is he okay?" I look at him, pleading.

He sighs and then nods, "yeah, he's fine. He got out of surgery a few hours ago but he still has yet to wake up. The doctors said it'll be a while till he recovers." I sigh, relieved to hear that Angel's okay.

But then I remember Luis, "What happened after I left Miguel?"

He looks at me and sighs as he sits down next to me and says, "After Luis saw you leave, he lost it and started yelling and was about to throw a grenade at us, but Edgar had to control him, though Luis almost pointed his gun at Edgar which probably would've got him killed. Edgar wasn't able to tame him fast enough before Luis called a war on us, Edgar was furious because around these parts calling out a war literally means they're at war now. It triggered a lot of my guys and eventually half of their men died, and then they escaped. To be honest with you I don't know what they'll do to him… him declaring war like that and then that many people dying, it means this really is the beginning of a war, and I hope you're prepared for that." he says sighing.

I nod, thinking about all the things that are going on and how they'll just get even worse after this.

Miguel then takes me to my room and tells me to rest, after he leaves i shower and then sleep. I don't know how long I've slept when I'm woken up to yelling coming from downstairs.

I get out of bed, slip into my slippers and go out onto the balcony that overlooks the main entrance and living room. I see Miguel and others talking, Miguel looking worried and angry, starts yelling again and then slams his hand on the table, making me jump.

I want to listen to what he's saying but I don't think I should, so end up going back upstairs and head to bed. I wake up to Maria tugging at my blouse, "rose! Angel's awake! Come on let's go see him!"

The second I hear Angel's name, I sit up and look at her, "where's he?" I say quickly, "he insisted on coming home last night, so he's in the infirmary."

I pull aside the covers and quickly run out and to the infirmary.

I open the door and there he is, the room looks like it's been turned into a one person hospital room, and angel looks so out of place, like he's not supposed to belong there, and he's not… i am.

When he hears the door open he opens his eyes, looking at me vulnerable, and the guilt piles up. I can't face him, because it's all my fault that he's there.

I look at him, "I'm sorry, i can't do this" i say as i walk out of the room, i hear him call my name as i run out of the room and down the stairs.

I find myself running out to the front of the mansion, where I take deep breaths and realize that it's still really early, the sun's barely coming up.

I look around, taking deep breaths, I don't know what to do, I lost my brother, I almost got Angel killed, it was my fault that a war almost started between two rival gangs… I only cause pain to others, so what am I good for?

"What happened back there? Angel said you walked out on him, even after you told me last night that you had to see him." Miguel says as he walks up behind me.

I stand there, looking at the sun, not wanting him to see me, "Aye" I hear him say. I shake my head, "I'm no good for this, I get too emotionally invested in situations." say to him, still not wanting to turn around.

I hear him chuckle, "Love, you handle things better than most, a lot of my men have to attend therapy at times because they can't deal with certain things."

I turn around, "the situations in my personal life literally got one of your men kidnapped Miguel! My life is going to get your men killed! Luis literally declared war on us! How do you expect me to be here knowing that people will die because of me!?"

I shake my head violently, tears flowing down my eyes, I can't let people die because of me, I just can't.

"Amor, I promise you, I will find a way to stop this war. Alright?" he says holding my face in his hands, I nod, but i know he won't be able to stop this until Luis has me and santiago back on his side, even if i told him we were no longer family.

"I need to talk to him Miguel, maybe I can do somethi-"

"Hell no rose, he won't stop, especially not after this. I'll talk to Edgar, maybe we can figure something out."

I shake my head, "Please Miguel, i need to talk to him." he stays quiet for a few seconds before nodding, "Alright, i'll get in contact with edgar, see if he can give me his info."

i smile, "thank you Miguel" he looks at me nodding with a smile, "aye we still have one more thing to talk about" he says.