Daoist_spider

These are thoughts collected when feeling extreme emotions. In no way are they everyday thoughts or opinions. This book is not suited for anyone under the age of 15. Warning this book depicts depression and/or suicidal thoughts. This book was made purely for the hope that the author can use this to cope. If you don’t like this genre or the book/topics make you uncomfortable. Leave while you still can. Basically it’s like a diary, I post this so I may find out about myself and hopefully learn something from it. I do not post everything on here and some of the chapters might be removed due to either sensitivity issues or me being unwilling to share the thoughts anymore. Grab a bag of tissues and a box of melodrama and we can all just cry this out.

When you’re angry. When you’re sad.

I woke up fine today I was confused because I had no idea what time it was. I slept for 14 hours I think, I was hungry but the food I wanted was gone. No one was home so I made something. I am glad I did not eat it all.


It was 8 serving sizes I just needed 1.


I wanted to read but now I'm crying one of the most important things to me being able to read I can't do it right now without becoming too emotional that I have to stop I'm crying and I know it's just me being stupid but my emotions they are against me I just want to be able to read and feel appropriate amounts of emotions so I can enjoy the books. I want to go outside today but I have no motivation to function like an adult. I feel if I stand in front of a window or go outside today people ( there is nobody outside I checked) will stare and gossip saying I'm ugly. Look pathetic look disgusting look fat, unkempt. I'm giving myself anxiety and I can't stop it I'm trying but these thoughts are not going away I wish i could ignore those non existent people with their nonsense thoughts but it's invading my mind like a parasite. It feels like a parasite that feeds off fear is inside of my brain and its getting bigger. My stomach feels like it's dropping like I'm free falling I feel like I'm gonna be sick my chest aches and my head is throbbing and I'm getting mad that I'm still crying. Go away I want it all to go away. I want to stop this hurts


Can’t cope