Robbery

Inside of the Odd Jobs home, Hiroto was sat on the couch in the middle of the room, with Shinpachi sprawled along the couch, complaining.

"I'm so hungry… so hungry." Shinpachi muttered, holding his knees close to his chest.

"Shut up." Gin muttered from the office desk with the chair facing away from them. "Then why don't you just go home! You probably have food there."

"My sister is home today," Shinpachi replied, sitting up.

"Then what's the problem? I don't think she'll eat all of your food like Kagura." Hiroto said, glaring at the closet Kagura slept in.

"No, you don't get it. My sister's there, cooking." Shinpachi reiterated.

"Yeah? Then why don't you just go and eat if you're so hungry." Hiroto said, reading Jump.

"That's the thing. She always makes fried eggs, but the fried eggs make me see things I'm not supposed to see." Shinpachi said, looking at Hiroto. "Hiro, did you know that there's a kind of canned herring called Surstromming that has a smell even cats run away from. They say smelly things taste good."

Hiroto and Gin stayed silent, minding their own business.

"Gin, Hiro, did you know? The Inuit people, after killing a caribou, apparently eat even the gunky contents of the stomach. It must be warm and delicious." Shinpachi said, his eyes getting wider.

Hiroto just flipped to the next page of Jump, while Gin still didn't turn back to Shinpachi.

"Hiro, Gin, did you know? When an owl catches a baby mouse, it feeds it to fatten it in its nest before eating it. It must be plump and juicy for sure." Shinpachi said as he started to get hysterical.

"There are so many delicious things in the world." Shinpachi said, standing up, "When I think about it, the rent here isn't all that low, is it? There must be a ton of other places that are cheaper than this." Shinpachi walked over to Gin in his chair and turned him around.

"You know, Gin…" As Shinpachi turned the chair around, what he saw was a rolled-up tatami mat with a white wig on it's top. "What the?!"

Shinpachi then quickly went to search for drawers, finding them empty. "Our emergency funds! Wait, Hiro!"

Shinpachi turned to where Hiroto was laying and saw a blown up doll laying there with a Jump laying on its face.

"Ah!! Those damn borderline-diabetic french fry loving rat bastards!" Shinpachi shouted out in the house, cursing Hiroto and Gin's names.

Out on the streets, Hiroto and Gin were walking back from the store.

*slurp* Gin was drinking from a carton of strawberry milk, while Hiroto was eating an ice-cream.

"Achoo!" Hiroto sneezed, sniffing his nose. "Who's talking about me behind my back?"

"It's probably the ice-cream that made you sneeze." Gin said casually, drinking his strawberry milk.

"Probably." Hiroto said, eating his ice-cream then saying, "Hey, did you hear about the robberies that have been happening lately around here?"

"Hm?" Gin mindlessly muttered, "First time I'm hearing about it."

"I heard about it when I walked past a shop today, some guy was complaining to the police about how his register was swiped clean of money," Hiroto explained.

"Ehh." Gin muttered. "Stealing from these parts, you must be really desperate."

As the two continued talking, a familiar head stuck out from an alleyway, as the figure of Catherine came out, looking around her surrounding for something.

"Hey." Gin greeted.

Catherine paused in her footsteps, her eyes shaking.

"On an errand? That old hag is a real taskmaster." Gin said.

Hiroto stayed silent, eating his ice-cream.

"Y-Yes, I am. I came to buy Mu's cigarettes…" Catherine explained.

"I see." Gin said, drinking his milk.

Catherine bowed down and apologized, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

Hiroto raised an eyebrow but didn't say anything and let Gin continue.

"Anyway, this area is like a garbage dump where the trash piles up. What I want to say is, the two of us are alike, we're both trash. Hiroto included." Gin said.

Hiroto turned and glared at Gin.

Gin looked to the side and said, "No, trash isn't the right word. We're both boogers in the same nostril. In the same pot… pan… spoon."

"Gin. Just stop. You tried your best." Hiroto said, patting Gin's shoulder and turning to Catherine to say, "What he's saying is that don't take Otose's kindness for granted. She's a stubborn person but can be too soft for her own good, I mean, she has two people that never pays her rent on time."

Catherine nodded and said, "I understand. You're both good people. All of you are good people."

Then, a police car drove by next to them, stopping just a few feet away. A man got out and faced the three, saying, "You three from around here?"

"What's it to you?" Gin answered.

The man took out his police badge and said, "Have a look."

"So? What do you want." Hiroto said as Catherine avoided eye contact with the policeman.

"Can I get you to cooperate with an investigation?" The policeman asked.

Gin looked to Hiroto, who just shrugged and said, "Sure, why not."

"Thank you." The policeman said, "Can you take me to where you live? This would make the proceedings a lot easier."

"Whatever." Gin said as he led the policeman towards Otose's bar along with Hiroto and Catherine.

Hiroto went up into the Odd Jobs building and told Shinpachi and Kagura to come down to the bar for a moment. Once downstairs, everyone was gathered around, with Kagura once again eating.

"Is this everyone?" The policeman asked, with his partner next to him.

"Did something happen?" Otose asked.

"Yes, there have been several robberies in the vicinity." The policeman said.

"Eh?" Shinpachi muttered.

"Sixteen since the start of this month." His partner answered.

"Eh, that's pretty troubling." Gin said, burping.

"Yeah, it's a shame what happened to those people," Hiroto added.

"Says the two thieves who stole the money! It's obvious by that sweet breath of yours! And you still have ice-cream on your cheek!" Shinpachi shouted, pointing at the two.

"It's not ice-cream, it's whip cream." Hiroto corrected.

"It doesn't matter!" Shinpachi retorted.

"The perp appears to be an Amanto." The policeman continued. "It's still under investigation. I thought you might have heard any disturbing rumors."

Gin immediately answered, "In that case, I have heard one." He pointed towards Kagura. "She's your suspect."

Kagura looked at Gin's finger, grabbed it, and bent it backward.

*crack*

"Iyaaahhh!!!!" Gin screamed out. "What the hell did you do that for?!"

"Men who make bad jokes get finger broken," Kagura said with her eyes closed.

"Never heard of it!" Gin shouted.

Hiroto turned to the policeman and said, "Oi, is there a reward for deporting an Amanto that threatens the world's supply of food?"

"Uh, deportation isn't free…" The policeman said.

"So sir, I'd be returning home in disgrace," Kagura said with pride.

"You'd be returning home in a wheelchair from how much you eat!" Hiroto shouted.

"You're in no position to be choosy!" Gin said towards Kagura.

"Worst comes to worst, I'll just hold onto the side of a ship and go home like that." Kagura said with confidence.

"Oi, this ain't a cartoon, Kagura. Don't let those shows influence you." Hiroto said, knowing Kagura would actually pull a stunt like that.

"That's a cold calculation!" Shinpachi shouted, jumping forward.

Gin then said, "Even if she's thrown into space, she'll have no problem surviving."

"I'm not a cockroach!" Kagura shouted back.

"How dare you say that!" Gin shouted.

Hiroto pointed towards Kagura and said, "Apologize to the cockroaches of the world! The greatest survivors of Earth!"

"No way!" Kagura shouted, pushing Hiroto back.

On the side, the policeman said to Otose, "Am I… in the way here?"

Otose replied, "Anyway, we don't have the kind of money that someone would steal. Well, if anything does happen, we'll let you know."

Catherine on the side looked away, as Hiroto and the others were arguing with each other. Hiroto slightly glanced towards Catherine, but his hair was grabbed back by Kagura.

"If you don't feed me, then I'll just have to sell you off!" Kagura shouted.

"Oi! What are you, a loan shark?!" Hiroto shouted, trying to pry Kagura off of his shoulders as he refused to let go.

The night continued on, as everyone then parted ways, with Hiroto and the others going back to the Odd Jobs house. Hiroto was outside on the balcony, almost like he was waiting, as the door behind him opened up.

"Hm? What are you still doing out here, Hiro?" Gin said, scratching his stomach.

"Just admiring the night sky," Hiroto replied.

Gin just shrugged and said, "Whatever, just don't howl at the moon and turn into a werewolf. Ugh, my stomach. I shouldn't drink sweet milk beverages just before going to bed."

Gin walked away, leaving Hiroto by himself. 'Hm, she should be coming out soon.' Hiroto thought to himself.

From the side, Hiroto heard Gin's footsteps reach the ground, as he opened the sliding door into Otose's bar. What he encountered was Catherine right in front of him in a black outfit, carrying a metal box with two hands.

"What? Working overtime?" Gin asked, scratching his head.

From behind Hiroto, Shinpachi came out and said, "Ah, Hiro. I'll be returning home now. Good night."

"Yeah, good night." Hiroto waved him off. Then, the door behind Hiroto opened up again. Hiroto sighed and turned, seeing Kagura with her eyes closed walking down the steps to the front of Otose's bar.

Waiting for a moment, Hiroto saw Shinpachi shouting at Gin and Catherine.

"I'm soooooo sorry!! Forgive me for interrupting your midnight tryst!" Shinpachi cried out, "I'll disappear. Please enjoy your dazzling world of pleasure!"

As Shinpachi turned to walk away, Kagura appeared in front of him with her hands on her hips, as she said with her eyes closed, "Dopes! Prostrate yourselves before my power. Uahahahaaha."

"You're sleepwalking," Shinpachi muttered, as Gin watched them. Catherine started to sneak away with the metal box in her hand, bringing out Hiroto's and Gin's scooter from the side of the alley. On the back of it was Kagura's umbrella, a cash register, and the metal box she was carrying.

"Huh? That looks like my scooter." Gin said.

"You're all good people," Catherine replied.

Kagura woke up and said, "Now that you mention it, the umbrella in the back looks exactly like mine."

Shinpachi then pointed and shouted, "That's the bar's cash register!"

"What the hell are you doing at this hour of the night?" Otose came out of her bar.

Hiroto watched the scene unfold and spoke up, interrupting everyone, "Well, it looks like your new hire, Catherine over here is stealing our belongings and money."

"Catherine?!" Otose said, her eyes narrowing.

Catherine got on the scooter and started to drive off, shouting, "Bye, rotten old hag. Mooroons!"