Sergeant Marcus Reporting For Toilet Duty Sir!

Marcus' eyes threatened to close as he forced himself to pay attention to the words that all so slowly fell out Mrs Ivanna's lips. He glanced to the wall clock and his head dropped to the table. It had been 2:53 for five minutes!

Environmental class dragged on, Mrs Ivanna's monotone voice calling out static sentences like code.

'She must be fucking with Mr William'

Marcus thought. 'There is no other logical explanation as to why she is still here at this school.'

He tried to picture them together in bed. Well, that would be really one fucked up session. Mr William, with his sixty-year-old dick shaped like an overripe banana penetrating into Mrs Ivanna's worn out coochie.

'Does she even scream during sex?  With that boring voice of hers? She probably sounds like Patrick from Spongebob when she moans.'

Finally, after three tiresome hours, school was finally over; for the other students that is.

As the other students packed and chattered, Marcus began ruling out the worst possible toilets he'd have to clean.

"Fuck this school and their unorthodox punishments," he whispered.

"Hey asshole, I see you've become quite a trend today. What did the old man tell you?"

Marcus gave a smug smile as Jeff sat beside him. He came in with a shirt that reeked Chanel, and a pair of jeans that Marcus had never seen before.

"Apparently from today onwards I am Arabella's newest janitor," Marcus grunted as he packed the last of his assignments in his backpack.

"Whoa! That was harsh man," Jeff chucked. "I'mma now be messing every inch of this school so that our new janitor here can have some work to do, won't want you slacking off now, would we?"

Marcus rose his finger to his friend as they both headed for the day.

"Anyway," Jeff began, "Since you are going to be here being patriotic to your school. I will be going home," he sighed -"Alone. And just sit on my couch and watch the latest episode of The Merger," he sighed again with a sweet smile on his lips, "Alone."

"You wouldn't dare." Marcus hissed.

Jeff gave a big grin and walked away. He pointed at a spot on the floor. "Watch this space, janitor Marcus,

"Just fuck off."

The school emptied in a matter of minutes. Marcus dropped his bag in class and trudged to the other end of the block to the janitor's closet.

Marcus shoved his hands in his pockets as he walked through the empty halls.

Slam!

"Shit!" He jumped as a door opened. He waited and when there were no signs of life he quickened his pace away.

Luckily John the janitor hadn't left yet when Marcus arrived. Marcus explained his situation to the man and he was given the required materials.

Marcus frowned at his equipment with pitiful eyes. Cloth, mop and bucket. Not even a toothbrush for the toilets.

"I'd be long gone before you finished, so you'd need to lock up."

"I'm not really good with keys."

"Then you best leave my equipment in my store."

"Okay okay," he said and took the keys.

With one last look at Marcus, John walked away and Marcus followed suit to his destination-- The toilets.

-----------

"Mr Stevens locks himself up to wank off"

"I fd Mister Tam"

"Missss Catherine has a big asssss."

"I want to die!"

"Someone please F me!"

"Liam has the biggest dck in school."

"I know right!"

"Mathew's tongue is sooooo good!"

"I fucked Melissa here."

"I love you!"

"Brenda doesn't know how to give blowjobs!!!!!!"

"You have got to be shitting me," Marcus grumbled as his eyes roamed the girls' restroom.

Bad handwritings of words meant to exist only in erotica novels with poorly drawn interpretations of porn sites material had taken up the role of wall paint. He stood still, wondering if he'd ever remain the same again.

With the WD 40 in hand, he sprayed the writings and fiercely wiped the cloth on the wall. Ten minutes later he was done cleaning a sentence.

"This isn't even graffiti," he grumbled as he set to work on a drawing.

He sprayed a generous amount of the WD 40 on the walls and rested on the window for a break. He glanced out and caught sight of the empty parking lot. It wasn't totally empty because a guy...no two...three guys stood chatting.

Marcus stood straight and peered to get a better look. It was Stevens and two other guys in black suits. They stood outside a black Chevrolet Trailblazer and seemed to be passionately arguing about something. Hands animated as they spoke.

One of the men motioned for the other to get in the car and they both sped away, leaving Mr Stevens alone. Mr Stevens looked to the sky and then to the ground before returning to the school's building.

Marcus shrugged off the event and returned to his work. Mr Stevens' business was no problem of his.

Forty-five gruesome minutes later, the walls were clean of all writing and drawing and marks. Marcus looked proudly at his work as he wiped away the beads of sweat from his forehead. He returned the equipment and after checking the door was locked thrice, he got his backpack and left the building.

Mr Stevens stood at a spot, staring at a blank wall when Marcus stepped out. The man turned, an immediate frown forming when he saw Marcus. Stevens grunted and walked away to his office.

Marcus looked back at the man and pondered following him.

No. Not minding your business was what got you here in the first place.

With that, he tightened his bag strap and began his journey home.

***

"Mom, it wasn't my fault. Mom I was trying to help their friendship. Mom I had extra lessons...idiot do you think she's stupid," Marcus scolded on his way home.

"Can't have that woman ranting all day. No no. Can't handle it." He repeated as he walked.

Ever since their family reduced from three to two when his father left, Jane had been very interested in anything and everything her son did. Which meant she had to know everything. Even when the things to be known could and always ended up being bad.

The true reason why Marcus had done what he did, was cause it was the only way Jeff would let his thirty dollar debt slide, but his mother couldn't know that. As he entered the gate that led to his house he decided the truth wasn't what was going to help him today.

Marcus opened the door only to find his mother pacing across the living room.

Upon seeing him, she broke into a joyous fit and hugged him as if a while ago she was sure she wasn't going to see him again. She hugged Marcus for like a minute before she let him go and spoke.

"Oh darling, you gave me quite a scare. What were you doing in school? I called up Jeff to check on you but he told me you remained in school doing something that he did not know of."

Lacking an oral answer to give her, Marcus fished out Mr Stevens letter from his backpack. He thought that it wouldn't be that bad if she read Mr Steven's version of the story probably because he did not even take a minute to write the letter.

His mother opened the large envelope and read out loud.

Dear Mrs Miranda,

Your son Marcus was today caught inciting two girls against each other.

Jane gasped, looking wide-eyed at her son as he gulped his life away.

Those two girls had fought to the brink of tearing their clothes off. He had used highly inappropriate language to incite the girls against each other and it was lucky that Mr William intervened in time or else it would have turned into a police case. It is my responsibility to tell you that we have given your son appropriate punishment and that as a result, he will be extending his time in school serving his punishment.

Mr Stevens,

Deputy Principal,

Arabella Academy.

Mrs Jane recovered from her shock before Marcus and she blew.

"I work my butt off all day and this is what you bring to me!" she screamed shaking the paper in her hand." What in the world pushed you to cause trouble between the girls?! What did you achieve?! What did you want that I couldn't give you?!" She placed her hands on her hips. "Now this is what's going to happen. You're going to go to school and apologise to those girls and you bet I'm going to make sure you did it."

"Mom I can-"

"Go to your room now!"

'Thank you, Mr Stevens." Marcus mumbled as he headed for his room.

You just ruined a perfect mother-son relationship.