Killer

APRIL 1

Outside of the windows in Dominic's office, the sky hung in a color so bleak to Boris' eyes, the kingdom worked at a rate that was slower than he ever saw it moved. It was dull, everything felt dull, slower than the day before even when it wasn't.

Boris' fingers ran across the surface of Dominic's desk, the smooth wood gliding against his fingertips until he stood directly in front of the desk, gazing at the empty chair behind the desk. It looked the same as it did the same before. The same deep black shade, the same leather covers, the same designs carved into its arms but Boris knew very well that its black seat, was long cold.

The same went for the room in itself. The items in the room placed in the same order as it once was in, the books in the same position, the clothing hanger still held the prince's coat and in the air was his scent ever so strong. It was like nothing changed, but everyone in the palace and even those in the kingdom knew what had changed. 

A thing that Boris was well aware of when he stood in the room. The fact that was well attuned to him when he stood in the same room from the week he got to the castle, the fact that even in a room where everything seemed to have been stuck in time, there was still something missing. The brightness of the room seemed dimmed to him as he felt the coldness of how empty the room looked. The coldness of how bland the chair was, the missing presence and aura in the room. 

His missing Prince.

Dominic, had left the palace for war and it marked the first day since Boris became his substitute.

Everything still felt so unreal. The fact that the same person he had met just a few weeks ago was now in a war with his betrothed that tried to kill him, the fact that HE had been chosen to take Dominic's place while he was at war, and even though he had completed the training he needed, he still couldn't understand the fact that he was now in charge. That he was now his prince's right hand. That HE was now what the Kingdom relied on... that he was the person Dominic was trusting to take care of the kingdom.

It felt so unreal, like the most far-fetched dream he ever had but yet as he stood in the room, his prince's scent still lingering in the empty space it never felt more real. 

The past few days he had spent studying, attending some meetings alongside Dominic, and even getting to talk to the council members alone. Yet when he remembered watching as Dominic rode away on the back of a horse, thousands of men following behind him, the situation hadn't sunk him yet. The loneliness just now beginning to cave in on him. 

Boris gazed at the chair, his chest tightening again as he took in how bland it looked. 'What is this...' Boris thought to himself as his fingers clenched into a fist. His lips drew in as his face twisted in confusion and frustration. 'Why do I feel like this... what does this- what is happening?' he thought, his eye gazing at the table. 

It was hazy, but it was still there. The rough makeout of Dominic in the black chair, his smile still as bright and emerald eyes still as clear as his head tilted to the right, his hand waving Boris hello as his golden hair gleamed in the sunlight.

Boris stepped back from the table, rubbing his eyes as staring at the chair again. The smile and a familiar face were still there, gazing back at him with a grin that made his heart feel... constricted.

'Why...' Boris thought to himself, his hand running through his hair, 'why are you still here?'

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK 

The sound snapped Boris out of his thoughts and he turned to the door, his dazed eyes slowly starting to focus again. 

"Yes? Come in," he replied blankly as his hand slowly lowered from his hair, his body turning back to the black chair. 

Sounds of footsteps sound into the room as the figure walked in. 

"Hello Boris, it's been a while," the voice greeted. 

Boris sighed, his hand running through his hair as he begins to speak. "Please refer to me as-" his voice trails off as he remembers the voice he heard.

Slowly, his head turned around, fear gleaming in his eyes as he feared to see who stood behind him. His eyes dimmed when they locked on the figure, his heartrate slowly reducing as he slowly took in the familiar face, a sense of disgust rising in him. 

"Seems like you got a lot farther than the last time I met you," the voice greeted with a smile that sent shivers down Boris' spine. "It's nice to see that you still recognize me though."

In front of him stood the person he hated the most, the one he wanted to erase from his memories without a second thought, the man he wanted to kill. The same prideful, shameless man stood before him with a smile he had seen 7 years ago, the same greed shining in them when they gazed at Boris. 

The man who ruined his future with one lie and destroyed his trust in one second. The man he held the worst memories and bad emotions against and the man he hated for ever letting him feel like he could be trusted.

Felix March. 

The murderer who killed his family. 

"It's an honor to see you again, Borie."

*      *      *

7 YEARS AGO 

"Boris! Stop running away! I need to talk to you," a voice called out behind Boris. 

Boris continued running, not even daring to stop once to look back at the boy following him. 

"I said, STOP!" the voice shouted, jumping on Boris and pushing him to the ground, their bodies landing on the hard ground in the tall stripes of grass. 

"NO! YOU STOP THIS! WHY DO YOU KEEP ON FOLLOWING ME WHEN YOU WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH ME!" Boris spat back his voice loud and harsh, a large force of anger fueling them. "Get off me, Felix. You shouldn't be found around me after all."

On top of him was a face ever so familiar, a face he never got tired of seeing. The lean and slightly built body of his friend Felix, that stared down at him with deep brown eyes. Eyes that always seemed to know how to plead with Boris, eyes that put him on guard in one glance and a touch that made him tremble. 

"Boris, listen to me. You know I didn't mean any of those words," Felix pleaded, his hands reaching down and laying on Boris' chest. Boris trembled. 

"No. Get off me," Boris retorted, attempting to pull himself off the ground. 

Felix pushed him down and leaned in, his long deep brown locks, brushing against Boris' cheeks as they curtained his line of vision, only letting his eyes see Felix. "I only said it to them because I had no choice. You know I don't think of you like that, I could care less about the rumors about you and you know for a fact that I don't hate it either."

"Please," Felix muttered, pushing his body more onto Boris, his face leaning closer to Boris'. His deep brown eyes shifted from Boris' lips up to his golden eyes. "Please believe me."

Boris shuddered, his heart skipping a beat for a moment as his cheeks growing hot. 

"I hate you," he muttered, his voice barely that of a whisper. 

"What was that?" Felix asked, his head tilting to the side as his eyes dug deeper into Boris' golden rays.  Slowly, he was overwhelming him, filling his mind up with one thing and one thing only. His brown eyes, his face, and his touch. 

"I said," Boris continued, biting his lips for a moment before pushing Felix off him, "I hate you." He flinched when Felix hit the ground harshly and his hand twitched, almost moving to help him up. "I hate the way you treat me, I hate the way you see me as a doll. Like someone, you can pick up when you want to play with and then toss aside for others when you realize I can't help bring up your social worth," he stood up from the ground and peered down at Felix. "I hate the way you play with me, with words you craft so beautifully, and then go behind my back to demean me with people you know can bring you up the social heircharcy. I hate the way you control me with those eyes because you know in the end I'll come crawling back to you."

Felix looked up at Boris with blank eyes, like he wasn't receiving any of the words Boris said. 

"Yea... that's the gaze. That look in your eyes of no remorse. That's the true eyes you look at me with... that smile you fake and the words you say so keep me dangling like your pet... those are your true intentions," Boris snapped. 

"Borie... you know that isn't true," Felix sighed, standing up from his position on the ground, "I would never toss you aside for my own needs..."

"Ha..." a broken laugh left Boris' lips. "You're lying again," he muttered, his vision clouding up as he peered at Felix once again. "I hate it when you lie..." he uttered quietly, his lips quivering as he turned away from Felix, beginning his run away from him, "and I hate it when I feel like believing you."

"BORIS!" Felix called out as he watches Boris run further away from him, his figure running out of the field and turning the corner of a building. 

"Hey, Felix!" A voice called out behind Felix, causing him to look back at the people behind him. "Are you chasing after that boy again?"

"Oh! Max! Hi, and no-"

Felix turned back to in front of him where Boris ran away. He knew that just around the corner of that building would be Boris, hunched over on the floor crying. He was just a seconds of a run away, waiting for him to apologize while crying, the gaze in those helpless golden eyes when they looked up at him, the stare he craved to see. But...

He turned to the boys behind him and grinned. "Of course not. Why would I chase after him? Give him a few hours and he'll come crying back, praying that we can be friends again. It happens all the time."

Max stared back at him, his eyebrows raised in question as a grin formed on his face. "You sure? Your wife just might decide to run away for real."

Felix burst into laughter. "Whose wife? Don't call him that for me, how would I take that as a wife?"

Max stared back at him with uncertain eyes for a moment before grinning. "Yea.. that's what I thought," he chuckled, swinging his arm over Felix's shoulder, "so you ready for later today? That little squirts going to meet his doom today."

"Hahaha! You bet I am! Can't wait to see his face when he begs us!" Felix grinned, laughing along with Max and the friend that followed behind them.

"Same," Max chuckled, ruffling Felix hair, "LET'S GO BOYS!"

* 

Boris stared up at the ceiling, silence weighing down on him like a heavy blanket. It was quiet, way too quiet. So quiet that he could hear his thoughts, all of them overlapping each other, like they were fighting for his attention but they were all for one person, Felix. 

All he could do was worry. 'Did I hurt him?' he thought to himself as the scenes from earlier unfolded themselves in his mind. 'I said too much, didn't I? All I did was hit him with hard bullets again and again in my words and I didn't listen to his explanations... is he mad? So upset that he won't want to see me again? Thinking about me at this moment wondering whether or not I was still mad? Thinking of ways to fix this? Or am I being stupid when he hasn't even thought about me once this entire time?'

He sat up on his bed and sighed, scratching his head wildly. 'Why would I do that to the person I trust the most?! What if... what if he hates me now? What if all of that over-reacting I did simply led to him giving up on dealing with me?' he thought to himself as he buried his face in his hand, 'but... I wasn't wrong to think that right? He was using me. I felt used.. he was taking advantage of the... bonds... the emotions I have towards him and bending me to his will right? I wasn't wrong to scold him. He hurt me... I feel hurt.'

Silently, he stood up from his bed and tip-toed out of his room. 'If he was using me... if he felt sorry... he would come back to me and apologize right? He would feel sorry for all he did... right? I'm... I'm not overthinking, right? I'm the hurt one here... right?' he wondered as he walked down the stairs to the first floor and past the kitchen and living room. His hand hesitated for a moment before grabbing the door handle and pulling open the door, softly closing the door behind him.

He felt hurt, he should be the one that should be apologized to. He should be the one that should be waiting for him to come running back, begging to be forgiven. But yet... why was it that when he looked up at the dotted bright stars in the air, all he could think was one thing. 

'I wonder...' he thought to himself, walking off the front steps onto the ground, 'I wonder if I go there... will he be waiting for me?'

His heart clenched from the thought and before he could stop himself, he had already begun walking, his legs taking him to a familiar place. 

The walk was a long one to get there. Perhaps 30 minutes maybe before he could reach the place but he didn't mind. He never minded when he had to go there. The place where he had Felix would frequently meet up. 

He always liked these moments, the minutes he would spend alone, walking amongst the tiny ants that moved on the floor while the deep, black expanse of the night sky followed him silently as little white dots laid scattered in its wide body in an order as free as a splatter of paint against a canvas but yet so beautiful. In front of him, just past a few more houses was the long and free lands of the fields, the twinkling lights of bodies of fireflies like little beacons pulling him further away from his house.

Once in the fields, he let out a deep sigh, and sucked in a deep breath, the coolness of the air outside rushing into his lungs, stinging him with sharp coldness. He grinned, his hands lifting up to reach into the sky, pretending that he was touching one of the many stars in the sky as he walked. Grass tickled his feet in the open areas his sandals allowed them to touch and beside him, he saw rows and rows upon high grass, the lights of fireflies weaving through each long strand of grass. 

it was beautiful... but even more beautiful was the stars. The place where was headed was a big roc where he would lay with Felix for hours as the world went to sleep, pointing out the stars in the sky and even trying to count them one by one for hours while they talk about nothing in particular. It was peaceful... calming. Then they'd just turn to look at each other... staring into each other's eyes and then just... smiling and turning back to look back up at the stars. Finally, in the wake of the day, they would run back to their hours and slip under their bed covers just in time for their parents to wake up.

It was fun... he missed that. 'No...' he thought to himself as he looked ahead, the big rock coming into sight, 'I miss Feli-' His eyes widened when he spotted the familiar figure sitting upon the rock, his back arched over like... 'So he was waiting for me?' Boris thought to himself, a bright smile growing on his face. His heart clenched and his shoulders lightened. 'I knew it...'

"Felix!" He called out, running towards the rock.

"Boris?!" Felix exclaimed, turning to look at Boris with wide eyes. He watched as he slid into the seat beside him on the rock. 

"Don't look at me like that... I'm still mad at you, you know?" Boris huffed, turning away from Felix exaggeratedly.

"I know..." Felix muttered, a light chuckle leaving his lips before disappearing. 

"and?" Boris pressed, prompting Felix to reply to the words he wanted to hear. 

"And I'm sorry. I came to apologize," Felix muttered. 

"Hehe-" Boris began turning to Felix, pausing for a moment when he looked at Felix's eyes. It could have been the darkness of that night hugging them, or something else. In his deep brown eyes, were a hint of sadness.

"I... I shouldn't have done that to you," Felix muttered, "all of that manipulating... I used you against your will and took advantage of your feelings and-"

"It's ok!" Boris grinned, a bright smile growing on his face, "I'm fine as long as you admitted to it and apologized."

"No... I didn't finish," Felix muttered, turning to face Boris, "and please... please don't smile."

"Hm?" Boris cocked his head to the side, "Why not? I said I was ok, don't worry too much. Just be careful not to do that again."

"No... that's not the thing.. I- I'm so sorry. I was so filled with my desire to have new friendships... new connections that will help me in the future with my life that I lost sight of the friendship that was right in front of me and my self-control," Felix muttered, his voice choking up, "I- I'm so sorry."

"I- I said it was ok though... so don't worry about it that much. Your shaming is starting to bother me... just a bit," Boris grinned, pulling Felix into a hug. 

"No.. NO! THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT! LISTEN TO ME BORIS!" Felix snapped, pushing Boris away as tears started running down his face, "I... I didn't mean to. The boys... they were joking around with this kid... an- and I wanted to build their trust so when they asked me... I didn't think that much about it... I'm so sorry... I didn't mean to... I didn't mean for this to happen to him... to you. That brick... I shouldn't have picked it up..."

Boris tilted his head to the side, "Brick...? what? Slow down Felix I don't understand."

"The boy. He's dead. I- I was the reason why he's dead... if only I didn't listen to them and didn't pick up the brick. If only I came after you.. if only I didn't- I didn't blame you... things wouldn't be like this now..." Felix muttered, tears falling down his face. 

"You... killed someone? How- what? what does that have to do with me?" Boris stuttered. 

"They... they needed someone to blame. In the midst of it all.. I wasn't thinking... there was just so much blood... an-and they asked for a way out. That if I didn't find a way to fix this... they would blame it on me and I- my family... so I ended up saying your name. They all agreed to it and I was forced to go with the plan that you were the murderer... the one that hit him with the brick...'

Boris froze, his pupils shaking as he gazed at Felix. "You- You what? You blamed me for what?"