I Hate You

Her face buried in my shirt, her tears made a patch of wetness that clung onto my body like the pain in my heart. The sounds of the battlefield muffled her sniffles, but I could hear it loud and clear. The tremors in her voice. The yearning that was for someone other than me.

I laughed as Fiona's head nestled atop my heart; her face still buried. A terrible coincidence, it seemed. I've really overestimated my willpower in overcoming this possessiveness and jealousy, I muttered to myself. As much as I would not like to admit, I was truly a selfish bastard. That split second she cried out that her old daddy might be here. It overjoyed me he died, leaving only behind remnants of a ghost, but he had left more than that. He'd left behind an imprint of himself on Fiona's heart. Someone more important than me. Me!

The ice cold flow of energy from the Frost Devil Arts calmed me down as I glanced backwards at the dissipating ghost and then at the weeping Fiona in my arms. The damn thing was perfect for me to vent on. I closed my eyes and sheathed Heartbreak, wondering what the hell should I say to console Fiona.

My hands moved to the sides of the lips, and I raised her up. Her silver hair's and watery blue eyes were a stark contrast to the red background of the dungeon, but she still mesmerized me. Time seemed to have slowed as the wails of the ghosts turned to shrieks of the pain from behind the two of us, but hey, as an assassin, they were only music to my ears. She blinked and hiccuped, sending a slight tremble to her hips. God, it's like she's seducing me, she's so cute... who knew whether or not, the tremble was from my hands or not.

Yes, she's Fiona, my cute cultivator daughter. Even her birth father won't change that, so why should I continue on to care about him and their relationship? It doesn't really matter if I'm not the number one in her heart. This unconditional love and the way our relationship is progressing now... leaves me satisfied at the very least.

Humans are greedy creatures. They'll always be craving for more, love and relationships especially. I looked at her big, wide eyes and rosy red cheeks.

One day, she'll declare proudly, 'That's my daddy.'

One day she won't be shy and jump into my arms and nuzzle against me under the eyes of the public, where she'll blush and murmur 'I was too excited.'

One day, she'll whisper and my ears will hear 'I love you, daddy.'

From the bottom of her cheeks, I wiped away her tears and leaned forwards for two sloppy kisses. "Don't cry, Fiona. You'll look ugly, you can't let your daddy see that."

She looks ugly; I look ugly, everything is ugly. It's true that a parent's heart turns ugly when their child cries! How could I bear to let my little kitten shed all of her tears... her birth father, what a bastard, making her cry like this?

Fiona blinked as she stared blankly at my face that just an inch away. Her scent, her warmth, her breathing... all of it felt so familiar, I mused, making a mental note that Fiona... throws a tantrum and cries easily. And when I try to console her, it always somehow ends up like this...

My lips curled up to a wry smile as sure enough, Fiona gave a slight chuckle. Her breaths grew deeper and deeper until her body relaxed and leaned forwards. I gladly accepted it as her head rested on my shoulder. "I'm sorry, daddy," she murmur, but I didn't know who she was talking to.

"You've done nothing wrong, Fiona. Don't stay hung up on all this."

"Fiona wants to see daddy again..." she whispered weakly.

My elbows extended, I grabbed her hands on the back of my neck. "Are you sure you want to see you daddy as a ghost? You'll... you'll have to kill him then."

...

Her frail body quivered a little as she digested my words. She realized. "No, NO!" she shrieked as her fingers dug into my back. The sudden pain shocked me as I let her continue. She's never thrown a frenzy like this before, I didn't know what to do. Ah, my words earlier were a terrible choice...

Lost at what to do, I could only tighten my grip on her hands and catch up with Lura and Rajah. Running away isn't an option. We need their help to get to Glendora. And maybe staying near other people will help Fiona calm down. It's also better for Fiona to face this sooner rather than later. She's latching herself too hard in the past.

"Daddy. I'll kill you." She declared suddenly, sending chills down my body. Her body, her voice... they were terrifyingly cold. This was my little kitten, so small and cute? That'll snuggled with me when sleeping and pout when she's in my arms? I almost couldn't believe it.

"F-fiona?" I questioned carefully, my pace slowing down from my anxiety.

"I hate you, I'll kill you! You wanted me to be happy... so why leave? Why leave and leave me like this?" she cried out as a burst of energy blew me away.

'Her spiritual energy is out of control...' I coughed and cleared away the red dust. Fiona stood, her hate-filled eyes narrowing into a glare towards me. She felt so distant right now. Where was her usual lively, angelic self?

Her eyes weren't even glaring at me, but at the tide of ghosts that were being pushed back. It's like... I became a stranger to her again. "Revenge, revenge..." she muttered. "I'll take revenge! You've become a ghost, a soul filled with hate! Stop, stop haunting me!"

"Fiona... j-just wants to r-run away..." she bawled, along with a gust of wind that blew her hair sideways. I blinked, my heart in a turmoil of complex feelings, and just like that, Fiona turned into a silver streak that flew past me.