Live in A Hole

I have been in my new training regime for the past few weeks. And it is significantly different than what I have been doing previously. The one big thing, is that I am no longer being abused in any way. I appreciate the fact that I am no longer getting hurt, but, much as I do not want to admit it, I have gotten used to be tortured. I know I do not enjoy those sessions, but to some extent, the routine was cathartic.

To some extent, I miss the times where I am getting physically tortured, as it made me learn to keep my focus. I am not sure if that is true for others, but for me, it was a learning experience. I cannot say if it was a good experience, but I will at least say, it was not completely bad, at least for me.

My morning exercises are no longer one of my requirements. Other than getting forced to push myself beyond what I should do, I never truly disliked the exercise. Keeping my body fit is something I know is overall for the best, so I continue that part of my training. Though, I am not pushing myself beyond my limits, at least I do not believe so.

Studying is one of the new things that I am doing. I have been given journals of those that have trained other Unleashed. Not all of them have maintained the type of training that was given to me. And in those journals that veered away from the normal training, There have been some success with other types of training. But, for the most part, the majority of the participants, while are able to control themselves under normal circumstances, when they have encountered stressful situations, they lose control. Unfortunately, it seems that what the most common training is, it is more likely to work.

Otec let me read his journal, that he wrote when he was training me. While I am abject to his truths, at least based on his writings, I understand where he was coming from. His writings, unlike his way of speak, is less prone to emotions. He writes in an almost scientific way. I can see that he has also been tainted by the training Unleashed receive.

I am taking it for granted that he is writing down the truth, as I can plainly see that each page is newer than the previous one. Either it was some long con that he is enacting, or he is being honest. Such a long laid plan would be difficult to keep on doing, and it does not seem that that is his style. I still question his motives, but I am willing to believe him.

Along with reading the journals, I am also, along with the other un-Chained Unleashed at my level of training, taught general knowledge. It is a true education, more than that I ever received under my parents tutelage. It is more of a modern education than that of one that the majority of people receive.

Maths, sciences, and history are the main topics of learning. The maths are under the level of what I have learned previous. Admittedly, I have a previous, modern, world of knowledge behind me. It is not rudimentary in the slightest, just less fleshed out. As I was never the best in more advanced maths, I was never truly able to understand the benefit that some of the theories entailed.

With science though, there are concepts that I am being taught that I was never taught in my past life. This world has developed differently than my previous one, therefore different things have developed do different extents. At least the scientific method is similar enough that the goals reach conclusions that are approximating truths.

The history of this place, though, is something completely different. Less focused on specific people doing certain things. Studies in history are more about the why something happened. For a bunch of kids, this is beyond what I could imagine.

For instance, instead of it being that Prince Ralph set fire to a marketplace, and that set out an uprising in his province. What I am taught is that due to a wave of droughts, the populace started to rebel. Wanting to put down the rebellion, before it gained steam, Prince Ralph brought out some troops. Due to some accident, the marketplace caught fire. As the rebels thought that Prince Ralph was the cause of the fire, they attacked, leading to a bloody conflict. Cause and effect, instead of rote memorization.

All Unleashed, other than those at the initial level of training, are given chores to do. For the un-Chained, it teaches us the skills that we need for daily life. It is on a weekly rotation for the un-Chained, the Chained Unleashed stays on the job that they are either better at, or the one they like to do more so than others. Gardening, cooking, cleaning, and some basic carpentry are things that I have done so far. I am very unskilled at these tasks compared to the rest of the people there.

The last new item on the menu for my training, is conversing with the rest of the un-Chained. Where previously I was forbidden to speak to others, I am now forced to. This is the hardest part of the day, being forced to converse with others. I have not had that luxury in years, and now it is difficult.

Other than my family, I have never had much interactions with other people, just social interactions. Now, though, I am to interact with others of my own physical age. Like me, all the others are socially inept. We can discuss facts, but when it comes to personal experiences, it becomes harder.

I can speak of what my family was like, and what we did on a daily basis. When it comes to funny stories or other such trivialities, I am not able to express what was important about those situations. Some of the older un-Chained are more able to, though they also have trouble getting the nuances out. We are, essentially, blind people trying to talk about colors.

I need this kind of training to be able to become part of society again. On a personal level, I would be fine not socializing with others, and be left to my own solitude. However, I have begun to want to see my family again, and as I am right now, I do not want them to see me like how I currently am.