My Husband's Lover (14)

I could not go back to sleep. I shifted to different sleeping positions, but they did not work. Liqin's sad face always came to mind. Then it would always be followed by Guowei and Liqin's hugging silhouettes.

"Please don't tell me that I'm falling in love with Liqin."

"Who is falling in love with who?"

"Old man!"

"Sshh. It is sleeping time."

"Can you not appear just out of nowhere?"

"But that is the only way I appear - out of nowhere."

"Then can you do it without scaring me?"

"I have appeared many times but you only complain now." He sat in front of me and asked, " So who is falling in love with who?"

"No one," I turned away my head.

"Okay. So you are falling in love with Liqin."

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course."

"But what about those tingling sensations you feel in your body when you see Liqin?"

"How do you know about that?"

"What about the pain you feel when you see Liqin disappointed or sad? And what about those pangs in your heart when you see Liqin and Guowei together?"

"That... That's just my fondness over Liqin. Readers always have one character that they love. In my case, it's Liqin."

"Are you sure it is just a reader's fondness over a character?"

"Of course. I've been rooting for Liqin since chapter 1."

"You can lie to everyone else but not me. Do not forget that I am the God of Love."

"You may be the God of Love but you don't know my heart."

"Oh, I am very familiar with the heart."

"Just shut up. I'm going to sleep now."

I lied down and put the pillow on my face. He took it away and said, "Even if you close your eyes that hard, you will not be able to sleep. Do you want me to help you?"

"What are you going to suggest? Count sheep? I've done that already."

"Have you done this?" He showed Yanyu's diary.

"Yanyu's diary?" I asked.

"Why not read it?"

***

[as written in the diary]

Liqin came today. I was nervous when he ate a spoonful of the soup I made. It was my first time cooking. He said it was good and I could not stop releasing a sigh of relief. But later on, he showed signs of discomfort. He went home early. Liqin was kind. Instead of disappointing me by saying that the food was not delicious, he kept it to himself.

I was reminded of our younger days. Liqin and I were not in good terms. We were the best students in our class and as a woman, I always made sure to be the top. I wanted to show people that women had more possibilities than what society dictated. One day, we were asked to bake something. My food did not look good, but I was confident of it. I used science and mathematics to bake the perfect cookies. Liqin was the only one who chose to eat mine. "I chose this because I wanted to embarrass you. But it seems that I cannot do that," he said. I smiled triumphantly. I thought my cookies were really good. When I tasted it, the harsh reality hit me. But I was happy to be hit by such reality. That was the start of our friendship.

Liqin came again. I did not want him to force himself to say that the food is good so I did not cook. But he still showed signs of discomfort. I tasted everything and they were good. Later, we found out that Liqin was allergic to shrimp. He had also only found out. I was happy that the discomfort was not because my cooking was bad. At least I had the shrimp to blame for what happened the other day.

I stopped eating seafood. They were my favorite but Liqin was my most favorite of all. I did not want him to suddenly have allergic reactions. He always took food from me. What if he would accidentally eat shrimp? I could not afford to take such risk.

Liqin invited me to go to the festival with him. My mother and father did not allow me until Liqin himself came to our house and asked for permission. My mother and father trusted Liqin more than me. Who was their child? Me or Liqin?

I noticed that Liqin bought tofu in every stall. He must like tofu very much, as much as I liked seafood. I wanted to know how it tasted, but I could not dare to ask a bite from Liqin. He was enjoying every bite of it.

That night, I asked one of the servants to make tofu. I could not finish a bite without gagging. I did not like tofu. But I continued eating them. I had to get used to it because I decided I would be eating tofu in every meal. So when Liqin would take some food from me, it would be his favorite food.

"Yanyu, since you are going this far, make sure that Liqin becomes your husband," my mother said.

My parents were silly. They always tried to pair us up. They did not even try to hide it even when Liqin was there. I had to apologize to Liqin every time. But they did it too many times already that Liqin got used to it, and I did not need to apologize and explain anymore.

"Yanyu, make Liqin your husband, okay?" my father would remind me before I went to bed.

I already told them that we were just friends. But if fate would allow us to be more than friends, I would be the happiest.

[end of entry]