Goodbye

Ivailo's POV

I wouldv'e hugged him if I had known that would be the last time I'd see him. I didn't know it yet, but he was saying goodbye and I couldn't understand.

After he left that day, he never came back. Thinking about it now, it was the smart thing to do. His visits would raise a lot of suspicion. Especially because he had just lied about murdering his own wife.

It's a hard concept to grasp. I find it quite ironic. Father killed his wife because she was supposedly cheatong on him, while he had cheated years ago and even had a son. As I grew up, I became angry. Why would he kill his own wife? Why would he ruin the lives of his children? Why would he abandon me?

My mother came home crying one night. She told me that Father was murdered and that his youngest son had killed him.

We sat there in silence as she cried and cried. I couldn't feel anything at that moment. He deserved it after the countless lives he had ruined. Mother loved him. She knew he didn't feel the same way so she never said anything. Their relationship had been all fun and games for him but Mother actually felt something.

Seeing my mother on the floor sobbing made me realize how much hatred and resentment I had towards Father. His death was necessary and Mother deserved better.

As time grew on, Mother let me out of the den more. She thought it was unhealthy to keep me inside for as long when my father had just died. I never told her that I didn't care. I didn't want to break her heart. She was already so damaged. I've forgiven Father for everything else, but I can never forgive him for making a joke out of Mother.

Mother could have exposed his unfaithfulness. She could've demanded jewels and animals in return for her silence. She could've left the Pride Lands and left me with Father becuase to be honest I wasn't her problem, I was his. She never did any of that. She kept it simple. She agreed to raise me well as long as we had a comfortable space to reside in. Mother never wanted nor asked for anything more. Father kept his end of the bargain and gave us a den away from the other royal families, but he disrespected her name and everything she did for him when he killed his wife and lied about our existence. Mother will never be the same.

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I met Zuri while hunting for zebra. She was lying in the grass passed out. She was dehydrated. I got her somehere safe and went to fetch some water. When I came back, she woke up and kicked me thinking I was trying to do something to her. She apologized and we walked and talked all the way home. That's how our friendship began.

Zuri is the best thing that ever happened to me. She became my best friend. I told her about my family and she didn't seem to care. She told me about her marriage with the current king and her son. I want to become something more than just a friend. I love her, but i don't want to become a copy of Father. I don't want to ruin another little boy's life because I can't keep my paws to myself.

I know she hates her husband, but I can't bring myself to confess. I want to be everything Adahari wasn't.

Zahara's POV

I told Zuri about what happened between Mtukufu and I. She's the only one that knows. Zuri promised me that she would divorce him as soon as possible and re-marry a lion she met months ago called Ivailo.

I can't bring myself to tell Taka about what happened that night. He hasn't asked, he just told me to tell him when I'm ready. He's been so respectful. Instead of pushig for answers, he gives me space.

I don't know if I'll ever be able to tell him. Not telling him would put a wedge between us. Telling him would mean losing him. I can just imagine how mad he'd be that I didn't do anythig. It's all my fault. If I hadn't gone there in the first place nothing would have happened. If I hadn't froze maybe his brother wouldn't have put his dirty paws on me.

Dear Ancestors,

I love him. I love him so much. What do I do? I need to tell him, but I don't want to hurt him. I don't want to hurt myself either. Without him, what am I?

Taka's POV

I've been thinking about her a lot. I've been thinking about our relationship. I know we're married but something just doesn't feel right. It's not what it used to be. I still love her wholeheartedly, but I need a break. I need to find myself. Without her I am nothing and what good does that do for us? I don't love myself. I'm still caught in this immense depression. I need to find who I am without her before we can be what we used to. I'm breaking her heart to save what we have.