We had gathered a number of weapons from around the town, digging into the town's stockpile to get whatever we could to put up a fight with.
It seemed that, in the plunder, Heigou's weapon stock had been equally as reaped as the rest of the town's goods, the armory, with a blown out side wall, having been completely ransacked.
Zek, Ka'lira, Gordez, and I had only come with the gear off of our backs, not having much to donate to the cause. The mercenaries that defended the nuns, however. They had more to offer.
Longswords, short swords, spears, pikes, halberds, traditional bows, crossbows even.
"Where the hell did they get this stuff?" I asked to nobody in particular as I, along with the rest of Squad Iron Fire, watched the volunteers for our little excursion help themselves to whatever weapons suited them most.
"Well," Zek started, a humorous tint to his voice. "You can ask that girlfriend of yours once this is said and done."
I looked up at him, my expression unamused as he stood with that same usual grin on his face, attempting to lighten the mood. Whether it'd been in Ba Sing Se, aboard the Patriot, or even here, he'd never lost his sense of humor. I envied him. I missed the days when something clever to say came as quickly to me as the instinct to defend myself from any number of threats came now. Back in simpler times.
My eyes searched for Zare among the group of the vengeful 24 who had volunteered for the task ahead. I found her eventually, at the back of the weapon cart, grabbing a bow and a quiver of arrows, myself not able to help but feel a small bit relieved at knowing she'd be keeping her distance from the proper fighting.
I couldn't help but slightly regret that it wouldn't just be Squad Iron Fire to take the reigns on this. We've been up against worst odds before, and with my fire, we'd make short work of them. But I understood it would raise too many questions if we came back unscathed, leaving in our wake a pile of scorched carcasses.
"Alright!" Gordez called out upon seeing that everybody had armed and equipped themselves. "The mercenaries are camped in the woods by the river to the north of here. There are 37 of them, 4 of whom are earthbenders. They outnumber us, but we have the element of surprise. They'll likely have sentries guarding the perimeter of the forest. We'll take them out with our archers and get the jump on them within the forest. By the time they know what hit them, they should all be did. There are 28 of us in total. We will divide into 4 groups of 7."
I wondered who are extra 3 would be. I couldn't help but feel they'd only end up slowing us down.
I turned to Zek who was at my side, and whispered, "We'd be more effective if it was just the 4 of us."
"I guess he wants somebody with experience on each team."
Each team. "Wait. Zek. What do you mean each team?"
I received my answer just then as Gordez continued with his announcement, saying, "The teams will be headed by me, Zek, Ka'lira, and Luke," he said, nodding to each of us respectively. Wait. What?
I intended to speak to object but it seemed that a number of people among the 24 bloodthirsty volunteers already had something to say of the topic. "They're going to lead us?" "We're older than most of them by double." "That small one is younger than even my son was!" "You're putting our lives in their hands?!" "What the hell is the matter of you?!"
Yeah, Gordez. What the hell IS the matter with you? I stood patiently however, regardless of the insults and criticism being thrown my way. Granted, none of them were unjustified, but it still hurt.
"Listen. I know they are young, and I know that, at a first glance, one could be expected to have some doubts, but these aren't children. They're soldiers. How many of you can say you've fought in the war? How many of you can they they've fought in the battle of Ba Sing Se? That's what I fought. We have!" May be a good idea to stop before you say whose side we fought on, Gordez.
"Should I break the news to him that I didn't fight in Ba Sing Se?" I could overhear Ka'lira whisper to Zek.
"Let him ride this high right now. He's just trying to rally people. I'm sure once the heat has died down, he'll come to his senses."
It seemed I wasn't the only one who had my doubts. I wasn't sure if that came as a reassuring relief to me, or if it just validated my fears. Whatever it was, it didn't feel good. It didn't feel right.
"Now," continued Gordez. "Gather any last belongings you have. Meet us at the East gate in 5 minutes. From there, we march!"
With that, he began on his way towards the East gate, leaving me, Zek, and Ka'lira in a confused daze.
"What the hell just happened?" I barely let out.
"Let's go see," Zek said, hurrying after Gordez, followed by Ka'lira and me shortly behind.
"Gordez," Zek said, catching up to him as he was still walking. "That was just to rally the others, right? We're not really going to be leading them, right?"
"You are."
For fuck's sake. It was my turn to speak up. "Gordez, I know you were Boss's second in command, and maybe he taught you a thing or two about leading others, but that was just you. We didn't get the same. I'm only 13 for fuck's sake. You expect me to lead people twice to even three times my age?"
"You have more experience in the field than most of them do combined."
"So what's my excuse?" Ka'lira interjected. "I don't think being a whore on a ship full of soldiers actually qualifies me as a soldier."
I could still see the effect on Zek that Ka'lira's occasional reference of her past had. He'd ever so slightly turn away, his face twisting, clearly put at unease by it. I couldn't blame him. In his shoes, I didn't doubt I'd feel any different if somebody I cared about had been tossed around that way. He didn't seem to hold it against her, though, realizing she had little choice in the matter, but the concept of it still wasn't pleasant for him.
"You've been with us for a while, Ka'lira. You've seen war, and I've seen you hold your own before."
"Yeah," Zek interrupted, "But leading people is entirely different. If we mess up, it's not just our lives on the line, but people under us as well."
"That's the cost of responsibility. With no proper leadership, everybody's life would be in jeopardy."
"Then you lead us. You have the experience. Keep us together, lead a straight assault. We'd be catching them by surprise anyway. And with your leadership, it'd be a solid plan."
No it wouldn't. Gordez saw right through that feeble attempt to evade responsibility. "You know damn well that's not a good idea, Luke. They'd see us coming if we stayed that closely grouped together. We'll be launched a 4-pronged assault ranging from the Southeast to Southwest. We won't be far apart. Worse comes to worst, you link up with the team closest to you. Look, I know I'm asking a lot from you. I'm no Boss, but I have thought this through. We'll enter the forest in separate teams, and link up in the middle where the enemy is. From there, it'll simply be a matter of killing them before they kill us. No amount of planning will prepare us for that. I think we all know that well enough. Your jobs will be to simply make sure your people don't get spotted by the sentries. Understood?" He looked to all of us, none of us 3 clearly having been particularly excited by the prospect of leadership, but we understood there was little other choice. We'd do what we'd have to do.
We were at the East gate now. Directly outside, around 50 meters away, a few hundred bodies stacked into a pile, ready to be mass buried tomorrow. I clenched my fists. It should just be us. I could burn them all alive, and not have to worry about losing anybody else. But fine, if this is what it takes, we'll get the job done. Not one of them will get out of that forest alive.
The others were arriving, and teams were assigned. Randomly. I didn't, as I had hoped, get Zare assigned to mine. She had been put in Ka'lira's group, rather. Not that it mattered for the moment, I supposed. We were still marching to the general area as one large group. It was what would come after that concerned me. I knew Ka'lira, she was a good soldier, sure, but she had the least experience of us all. Of the 4 of us, she was the least qualified to lead. I felt guilty for even thinking it, but it was true, and I hated that it was. Just don't get her killed, Ka'lira. I already learned her name. Watching people whose names you knew die always hurt all the more.
We'd initially started with some semblance of a formation, me, Zek, Ka'lira, and Gordez at the head, our respective warriors behind us. To me, two of the nuns' protectors, Heni and Gehor had been assigned, along with 5 civilians-Gino, Luhaan, Banu, Fimor, and Rung. I'd restrained myself, back in Ba Sing Se, from learning the names of the new recruits. It made it harder when they inevitably got themselves killed. Here though, I didn't want to let myself go in with that same mentality. I wanted to, I needed to think that things would go differently.
The formation fell apart soon after. Not that it mattered. We'd organize ourselves when the time came for it.
Even my place at the head slowly diminished, unsure if it had just been that I wasn't keeping pace, or that I'd been pulled back, something that seemed just as likely as Zare was immediately by my side the moment I had trailed far enough away from the main group. I wouldn't be lying by saying that I expected what I'd been getting from everybody else-questions as to my competency, whether I could do this, all of that shit. As though I didn't have enough doubts on my own. Instead of any of that rather, she simply asked me, "You fought at Ba Sing Se?"
I turned my head to face her, having been expecting something completely different, and nodded. I guess that cat was out of the bag now. Thank the spirits that Gordez hadn't gotten carried away and said anything more. "I know," I said, conceding. "A bit young."
"Nah, not really. My brother was around your age when he joined the Earth Kingdom army."
"Did he-did he fight at Ba Sing Se?" I asked, terrified for a brief moment that he may have been one of the many faces I'd watched burn to death in front of me by my hand, praying her answer to my question would be-
"No." Thank Raava. "The Mojiang province."
"Is he," I paused, not knowing exactly how to ask, but thankfully, she removed the need to do so, shrugging and saying, "Don't know. Never heard."
"Wait, so your name, Zare, it's Fire Nation, but he joined the Earth Kingdom army."
"Fire Nation controlled the land, but the people less so. Even if he grew up with a Fire Nation name, same as me, part of the Fire Nation's cultural enforcement policy, that didn't stop him from leaving the first chance he got to free his country."
I couldn't help but feel a knot in my stomach now, myself having spent the last 2 years of my life fighting in the name of the Fire Nation, and now standing next to somebody who's brother had fought, and, let's be honest, likely died fighting for the country I'd been fighting against all this time, lying through my teeth, pretending to have fought for her country.
"So you're from Ba Sing Se?" she asked. "I mean, I imagine you are if you fought there."
One lie after another. Damnit, Luke. "Yeah," I said. "Raised in the streets," I said, attempting to at least make some recovery at approaching the truth. "Got conscripted by the army when they became desperate enough." Another truth.
"Hmm," she said. "I'm sure you have plenty of interesting stories to tell, then."
Oh, you have no idea.
"So what was it like?"
"Hmm? You mean Ba Sing Se?"
"The battle, yeah."
"Wasn't much of a battle. Most of it was spent in a trench, them pounding us with artillery for months on end to the point you forgot what the world sounded like when shells weren't constantly landing around us."
"Hmm," she simply said, myself not being able to tell if she was disappointed by the answer I have, herself finding it underwhelming, or if she just didn't take. Turns out, it was neither, as her attention, rather, was drawn to the formation that had stopped, as expected, approximately a half mile away from the forest. It was a full moon today, more than enough light to guide our way. From here, Gordez indicated, wordlessly, for us to divide into our teams. Even this far out, he was taking no chances.
I saw where my people were, moving to link up with them before feeling a light tug at my sleeve, prompting me to turn to Zare. "Hey, good luck," she whispered.
"You too. Stay safe."
She nodded, heading off towards where Ka'lira was already gathering her men. Don't get her killed, Ka'li.
I linked up with my team, themselves having already gathered for the most part. We would take the rightmost flank, ourselves already splitting off away from the others to head towards the East end of the forest, remaining low, Heni and Gehor at my side as we approached.
Unlike us, it seemed that the mercenary sentries had found the light of the full moon to not quite be enough, themselves holding torches to light their immediate surroundings.
How nice of them to broadcast to the world exactly where they're standing.
Idiots. Sure you can see the 20 yards in front of you quite well, but beyond that…?
We were just around 35 yards away, me, Gehor, and Heni huddled behind a rock while the militia hung a few dozen yards behind us, waiting for our clearance to proceed.
The sentry stood leaned against a tree, a bow and quiver strewn over his back, right hand lazily holding the torch by his side, his left picking at something stuck between his teeth. I'd like nothing more than to see the head of an arrow break his stupid fucking teeth.
"Heni," I whispered to the mercenary who was about twice my age. "How well can you shoot?"
"Asking me if I can take him out from here?"
I nodded.
He already had the arrow out of his quiver and nocked it. "Damn right I can."
"Wait," I held out a hand. Make sure nobody has a line of sight on him. If he goes down and somebody sees, we're fucked."
"There's nobody watching. Now let me shoot the fuck."
"Wait. We need to make sure."
"The longer we wait, the more likely we'll fall behind the others. I'm not letting them beat me to the punch."
"Wait!"
It was no use. He'd drawn and loosed the arrow before I could object any further. The arrow struck, but not fatally. The man went down, the torch clattering to the ground, still lit, its flames catching some blades of grass, too wet however to be set ablaze. The man was on the ground, an arrow protruding from his side, gasping for air through the one functioning lung he had left, writhing on the ground, reaching desperately for something at his side. He's going to alert the others.
I jumped over the rock we were huddled behind, racing towards his position as fast as I could, another arrow flying directly past my head as I did so, dangerously close, but another miss anyway, both in regard to me and the sentry who I wanted to think was the intended target. I reach the sentry, kicking his hand aside just as he brought up whatever it was he had been reaching for to his lips. His arm went flying to his side, whatever item it was in his hands toppling to the ground, the force of my kick prompting him to sit up further, perfectly exposing his neck for a quick slash of my blade across it. Black ooze seeped from the wound, the pressure pushing it out like some grotesque fountain you'd find in a Fire Nation city plaza. He felt down on the grass, dead, the scene promptly shrouded by Gehor's boot stomping on the flame of the torch, immediately extinguishing it.
Heni followed close behind, my look at him saying all that needed to be said. He made no show of giving two shits about what I felt, however, him towering over me, simply needing to look down on me to convey all he was attempting to say.
Well. Fuck you too.
I raised my hand, signaling for the other civilians to follow, looking to my left, not far away, seeing other groups entering into the forest. No alert so far. That's good. We haven't been detected yet.
I followed into the forest after Gehor and Heni, the civilians behind me. Guess I'm no longer in charge as far as the mercenaries were concerned. So long as they didn't open fire and start fighting before we were all in position, they could do whatever they hell they wanted. Just don't screw us, and you're free to kill all the mercs you want.
As we went through the brush of the forest, I could begin to hear the rushing of water coming from ahead. I'd caught up to the two who had taken the lead, and as our positions started to near one another, could even make out Zek's team to my left, albeit in the distance. I returned to the head of the formation, continuing along, not as a measure to assert dominance, but simply to keep things in an orderly fashion. I didn't want them, Heni especially, getting any reckless ideas and alerting the entire damn forest before the time came to do so.
We were closer to the river now, approaching a small clearing. Within it, as expected, was the enemy camp, tents strewn across the dirt floor, campfires burning, spits bearing animals cooking a midnight snack, another set of sentries, or perhaps just sleepless mercenaries, still awake, sitting by the fire.
I counted 4 people in total still awake, 2 sitting by the fire, both fortunately facing away from us, 1 taking a piss by the river, closer to where Ka'lira's group on the Westernmost end would be, and the last one sitting off on his own, just as likely asleep leaning against the trunk of a tree as not.
The 2 at the fire were closest to us. That would be our responsibility. I turned to Heni, putting the previous transgression aside, considering this his chance to redeem himself in my eyes.
"Alright," I said. "You shoot the one on the right, and I'll take out the one on the left, got it?"
He nodded, myself praying that I could expect him to do his job, and do it right this time. I held my short sword in hand, still bloodied from the previous sentry.
I stalked out of the forest cover, taking deliberate care in avoiding leaves, branches, hell, pebbles that may, if light enough, crack beneath my feet.
I was only a few feet away from the leftmost sentry, the right still very much alive, myself just waiting for the Heni's shot to come so I could pounce on the one that remained. Come on, Heni. Take the shot.
The shot came, the whistle of the arrow screeching as it penetrated the air to my side, plunging into its target. But the wrong target it was. The man directly in front of me, the leftmost sentry, went down, the arrow perfectly impaling his head, the shaft stuck in his skull, the point perfectly emerging from his forehead. It just had to have been the wrong target.
The man to the right, quite obviously having noticed the death of his comrade immediately to his leg, gasped in shock, seeing what had just transpired. He attempted to scream, but my left hand was already over his mouth, the point of my blade already in his stomach, the only noise that emerged being a muffled whimper as he dropped dead to the ground.
I turned back behind me, not saying, or even conveying anything, perhaps simply trying to give a reminder that I was here. Whatever good that'll do.
I turned around back in time to hear the soft splash of the pissing mercenary falling into the water flat on his face, an arrow straight in the back of his neck, myself suspecting Ka'lira's hand in that kill, as the other mercenary by the tree got pinned to the bark behind him by a similarly placed arrow.
The other teams were emerging from the forest now, Squad Iron Fire leading the way, other disparate forces behind them, none of them demonstrating the same rebelliousness that my group had apparently. Side effect of following a teenager into battle, it seems.
We quickly enough began linking up with one another, myself thankful at least to have made it this far without any of my people getting killed out of nowhere.
"Everybody accounted for?" Gordez whispered to me, a majority of out party having gathered, no shortage of eyes being kept on the tents around us, never knowing if somebody was listening.
Zek, Ka'lira, and I all affirmed the positive, myself gladdened by Ka'lira's indication that all of her people still lived and breathed. Gordez pulled out his knife from its place on his belt, saying, "Let's do this quietly then. Have your men go through the tents and take out anybody within. Keep your archers outside to keep watch. They may have other sentries we haven't seen."
We all nodded, relaying the orders to our men, Heni set to keep watch over the East of the clearing to ensure nobody snuck up on us. I, meanwhile, Danev's blade in my hand, chose my first target-a small enough tent to only house one, the canvas entrance sealed shut, quickly enough parting as I parted it before me, revealing a sleeping mercenary, completely unaware of the imminent death approaching me.
Some small part of me wanted to feel sorry, but all it took was remembering the hundreds of bodies piled atop one another to the East of Heigou, remembering Hana, to push any vague doubts I had aside.
I placed a hand over his mouth, waking him, his eyes shooting wide open, my face the last thing he'd see before my knife entered into his neck, and the life in his eyes quickly faded into oblivion. I departed my tent, met by the pleasant sight of others entering and exiting from tents. I turned East, ensuring that Heni still was standing at his post, but was met by nobody there.
Where the hell-
My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a scuffle behind me, myself turning to see Heni emerge from a tent, atop a mercenary's dying body gasping for air, a knife lodged into his chest cavity, the look on Heni's face speaking of nothing short by pure anger.
What the hell are you doing?
"Heni!" I whispered, his face turning to face mine for me to question him as to why he was here.
It would prove irrelevant, however, as the shocked pant of "Oh shit" emerged from behind me, prompting em to turn East, where Heni should have been, seeing only in his stead, a mercenary sentry holding an object to his lips, mumbling all the while, myself attempting to reach him before he could sound it off, but being too late.
The sharp shrill of the whistle penetrated the air as he alerted all those around us as to our presence. "Intruders!" He called out once, bringing his whistle to his lips again, in the middle of already yelling for a second time, "Intru-" his yell interrupted by my dagger slicing through his throat, sending him back to the ground. Damnit!
The camp was awake, the whistle having been enough to restore life around us. It only took a few seconds for mercenaries, some in nightwear, some already equipped, to begin emerging from their domiciles in mass, scuffles emerging in the tents where our people had been, one such scuffle resulting in one of our militiamen being forced out of the tent he'd attempted to infiltrate, a mercenary's hand wringing his neck, snapping it shortly after.
For fuck's sake! I was rushing the mercenary before I heard a rustle behind me, turning to face a new mercenary emerging from his tent, a spiked club already raised in greeting towards me. I swung towards him, hoping to catch him with a slash as he got to his feet. He, however, managed to throw himself back, avoiding my blade, regaining his footing rather quickly, springing back onto his feet, charging at me with a swing of his club, going straight for my head.
I backed away just in time to avoid his swing, raising my sword to block his counter swing, the wood of his club chipping against the blade of my sword, actually finding it lodged within. I used the moment to pull him towards me, himself still dazed by his present circumstance. I placed a solid kick to his chest, knocking him to the ground, my blade becoming free of his club, and forced it down into his chest, bypassing his Earth Kingdom security armor which he still had the gall to wear following the betrayal of his hometown, pinning him to the ground.
My blade emerged from his torso, bloodied and muddied, and I turned back, finding that the mercenary who had killed the militiamen now slumped on the ground, his skull a bloodied mess as Gordez reared away from it, morningstar in hand.
All around, the camp had shot into action, numerous brawls and exchanges occurring all around, my attention taken away from my surroundings as I heard the cry of somebody to my side, charging at me with a spear. Idiot. All it took was dodging out of the , grabbing his spear with my left hand, and slicing across his side with my sword in the right, and kicking him down onto a campfire to send him writhing in pain as the flames danced across his soon-to-be corpse.
"If only I could have burned you myself, asshole" I whisper more to myself than to him doubting he could even be capable of hearing my words over his own agonized screams.
I turned back to the fighting, now finding more fighters entering the fray, emerging from the east side of the woods-more sentries we had evaded before apparently.
These new attackers had caught a number of our forces by surprise, one knocking a militiaman over the heard with a spiked club, kneeling atop him, raising his club to finish the job before I pulled him back by the collar of his shirt, slamming him back first into a tree, slowly plunging my sword into his stomach until it reached the dark, my eyesight in tunnel vision, focusing on the fear in his eyes as he squirmed, shifting at the last minute to face to his left, my right, and I felt it, just the slightest shift in the air.
The blade left his stomach, and I spun, blade outstretched, cutting directly across the belly of the man who had been to my right, his guts pouring directly out of him as he collapsed to his knees, and sank backwards into the mud. That's what you get for trying to sneak up on me, asshole. I mustered up enough saliva in my mouth to spit on him where he lay, doing so, confident that the fight was near over, both my arms lowered at my side, until I saw the black outline on the ground-a shadow, next to my own. Oh no.
I turned, attempting to bring up my own weapon in enough time to defend myself, and there he stood. Or rather, there he was. To say he was standing would be giving him too much credit. Like one would nail a sign on a wall, his head was nailed to the tree trunk to his left side by an iron barbed arrow, entering just above his right ear, exiting out of his left, directly lodging into the tree. His hands had been in the very process of falling limp as I turned, axe in hand, my life having been milliseconds away from being suddenly cut off, myself only saved by whoever had landed that expert shot.
Who the hell?
I turned, looking around, attempting to connect a figure to the deed that had just saved my life, but could see no bowman nearby who'd have done that. Heni, I wondered, myself pondering the possibility of him having finally come to my aid rather than putting me in direct jeopardy. Instead of finding my mysterious benefactor, I merely turned to see the final moments of the fight playing out before me: Gordez knocking a mercenary beneath his chin with his newfound morningstar, Zek removing his blade from the back of a mercenary who'd been charging Ka'lira who let off a bolt at a mercenary, puncturing him straight in the heart, Gehor bearing down his warhammer atop the skull of a mercenary who was crawling away, reducing his head to a pulp of blood and gore, many others finishing the job, putting down the dwindling mercenaries that remained.
And just like that, it was all over, the bodies of the dead littering the camp. After everything they did: betraying their town, picking of its wounded, poisoning its sick and weary, it was finally over. They were dead. Too easy.
I looked at the bodies around me in disgust. They'd gone down too easily. After everything, I'd have though they'd put up a fight, make themselves a threat, but they were only a danger to those too weak to fight back. They were pathetic.
I kicked the singed corpse of the man I'd killed who'd fallen into the campfire, his body having smothered the flames beneath him. "Fucking pathetic," I mumbled, kicking the body again.
"Is it-" I heard somebody ask from somewhere among the carnage. "Is it over now?"
"Yeah," Gordez said, letting the morningstar he'd seized from a mercenary fall to the ground. "It's over." He looked up, now popping back into the present state of the situation. "Everybody, give me a head count. Find who's dead and who's injured. Count the bodies of the enemy as well. Ensure it's 37. We don't want any more surprises."
He turned to me now, Zek and Ka'lira also close by, all of us apparently having wanted to check in on one another to ensure we all still lived. We all wore the blood of those we'd been fighting, none of us unstained by it.
"You all alright?" Ka'lira asked, turning to me and Gordez, Zek having clearly been the first person she checked on.
We both nodded. "Yeah," I said. "You two?"
"We're good, Luke," Zek said, wearing a relieved smile on his face, clearly glad for this all to be over now.
We all stayed there for just a few moments longer before it would be Gordez who'd' interrupt the moment, saying, "Alright, we can rest later. Let's finish up here and head back to Heigou.
We all nodded, not one of us disliking the prospect of getting out of this warzone, and got to work.
I was counting the bodies, both ours and that of our enemy. I was at 13 bodies of the enemy when I stumbled across one of our own. So if it wasn't him, then who? Heni's body laid sprawled out on the floor, arms limp at his side, left ear to the ground, his blank eyes looking off into the distance, the back of his skull caved in. Despite everything, I couldn't help but feel sorry for him as I shut his eyes and numbered him as the first of our casualties. His bow was around his back, his hand, rather, still warm, still clutching a hunting knife. He hadn't fired his bow throughout the whole fight. So if it wasn't you, then who?
"Looks like it's over," I heard a familiar voice say from behind me, myself unable to suppress the sigh of relief I let out upon hearing Zare's voice.
"Looks like it," I said, turning back to face her, remembering my current count of 23 bodies. She looked around her, contemplatively by the look of it. "It had to be done, didn't it?"
I nodded. "Won't be hurting us anymore in this state," I said, my eyes drifting again to the burnt carcass. I turned back to her, seeing her still-clean self, unstained by any blood, neither her own, or that of others, a stark contrast to me who had the blood of 6 different people today on my hands and body. "Did you…did you kill anyone?"
She shook her head. "Shot at a few. Missed. Your friend, Ka'lira, she's a good shot."
"Yeah," I chuckled acknowledgingly. Maybe it was Ka'lira? No. She was firing bolts. Not arrows. She looked me up and down, her eyes clearly settling on the numerous blood stains across my body. "Not mine," I reassured her, realizing shortly after that perhaps it wasn't the best reassurance. I didn't want to consider how I looked right now-likely some bloodthirsty monster, but the look in her eyes didn't express fear, or anger, or anything along those lines. It was just the same green eyes that she'd had in this last week.
"I counted the bodies," she said. "We lost 4."
I grimaced. 4 more people we failed to save. My head sunk, to which Zare, upon noticing this said, as though attempting to reassure me, "Hey. Come on. It's a shame that we lost them, but now, the others are safe because of what they did, because of what you and you friends did. We wouldn't have had the guts to take them on if it wasn't for your people.
It was easy for her to say. She had no blood on her hands. It was easy to watch a battle from a distance and say you knew what war was.
I simply nodded, a part of me discouraged upon the realization of this disconnect we clearly possessed in relation to one another.
She sighed, nodding, and placed a small pat on my shoulder before turning in the other direction. I watched as she trailed away, the bow around her left shoulder, the quiver of barbed iron arrows jostling as she walked away, only 2 or 3 remaining, the subtle glint of blood against the shafts reflecting the light of the campfires surrounding us.
Wait. I turned back around, approaching the body of the man I'd found dead behind me, losing sight of him at first, him not where he was before, but rather, at the base of the tree trunk he'd been nailed to moments before, the arrow removed from his head, an oozing hole lying in its place.
No, I thought. It couldn't be. But as I turned to watch her disappear amongst the crowd of the battle's other survivors, I saw something I saw before-a disconcerting degree of comfort with the world of death around her. I turned back to the body that lay dead, myself know believing I knew who his killer had been.
I'd lost track of the bodies I was counting.
My mind was dwelling on something else entirely.