Chapter 32

When they got to the house Nanny took Aster up to get bathed and dressed for bed. After wishing her good luck on her adventures in the bath tub she was heading to before he followed Violet to the living room.

The rain from the afternoon had never let up, it was heavier than it had been now as they sat on the couch in front of the fireplace. She knew that making him wait for a response to his declaration of love at the restaurant was becoming cruel the longer she took to think of how o respond. "I got your letter—"

"I know." There's a gentle smile in his eyes as he spoke.

She blinks a couple times before speaking again. "The one you sent before my wedding."

"I know." He repeats with the same kindness of his expression. "Gilbert told me."

Violet sighed as her heart tighten, the threat of tears at the mention of her husband, especially from someone who had just confessed his love to her was a lot to process. "Leon…"

"Yes?" He was still being kind, and she realized it was because he was being patient with her, and something about that made everything feel a tiny bit easier.

"You're so good with Aster, and even Dietfried likes you in his own way… I want to say how I feel about you… " She had started to grip her skirts and stare down at her gloved hands, so when his hand grabbed the one closest, she didn't really feel it, but she felt the gesture.

"But?" He asks, leaning to try and see her eyes as they lifted to meet his with tears in her eyes.

"I'm not sure that I believe I deserve it." She says as the first stream of tears fall from her eyes.

"Deserve what?" He asks.

She swallows and takes a deep breath while still looking into his calm blue eyes, hoping to find peace of mind there and courage. "To love again."

Nanny came into the room then to announce that Aster was ready for her bedtime story from Mr. Stephanotis. He didn't let go of her hand as they stood, nor when they climbed the steps. He only let go before entering Aster's room.

Aster lay there on her cream colored bed holding a book up for him. "Seeking the World by Leon Stephanotis" One of his first collections of photographs and stories.

"Okay, but only one story, since a picture is worth at least one thousand words." He almost laughed his words as he sat on the bed next to Aster. When she curled into her his side he was a little surprised and looked to the doorway to see Violet leaning against the doorway with her arms crossed over her chest and a soft smile on her lips.

Aster leaned forward for a moment, and while staring her mother down patted the bed near Leon's legs until Violet cam in and sat where her daughter had been patting.

Leon smiled at the woman he was absolutely smitten with before opening the book and smiling at her daughter who was turning the pages until she found the photo she wanted to know more about and pointed to a photo of his mother, sitting int the garden painting. After pointing out how much she looked like Leon he explained to her that he puts a photo of his mother in every one of his books since she passed away.

"I didn't know you found her…" Violet whispered.

"I didn't. My cousin Fey did, the one you helped me write a letter to. She found both of my parents. I never got to meet my father, he sadly died in the war. I was able to spend a few months with my mother before she passed away from the cancer that had spread quit rapidly."

Aster pulled his attention back to her and asked what his mother was like. He smiled a little sad. "I don't have a lot of memories of her from when I was a child, but I think she was a good mother, who wanted her family to be whole, which is why she went in search of my father when he left to join the early war efforts. Unfortunately she was in a terrible train accident and her injuries stole her memories, so she forgot that she had a family." He continued to explain what happened to his mother, and how they were able to reconnect in their own new ways before she passed away a little over five years ago.

As Violet interpreted between them she found herself wishing that this was what every night time ritual had been like for her little girl over the last five years. Aster's uncle was there often to read and tuck her in, but Violet never sat in with them. Having no memories of her own parents she didn't realize what her daughter had been missing all these years until this moment.

Aster looked more mature than a five year old as she moved her hands. Leon didn't quit understand what she said, but he knew it made Violet's hands reach towards the green brooch she always wears and tears begin to build in the outside corner of her eyes as she nodded at her little girl before translating. "She says that she understands what it's like to have a parent you cannot touch but that you can feel by your side every day." She didn't stop the little tears of mixed emotions from falling as her daughter hugged Leon and he wrapped his arms around the little one and kissed her head as he squeezed his own eyes shut.

The both wished her sweet dreams and closed the door. They stood there for a moment on the other side of the door looking into each other's eyes. She was still emotional from the watching the tender moment between him and her daughter as he pulled her into an embrace. As her ear rests on his chest and his heartbeat filled her ear every dam she didn't even realize she had built up since Gilbert passed crumbled. He held her a little tighter, and when her knees faltered he picked her up and carried her towards the other bedroom.

He sat her down on the edge of the large bed and as she began to calm herself he went to light the fireplace. When he stood and turned back towards her he spoke in a serious and gentle tone. "It doesn't matter how much I believe it, I can't make you believe that you are deserving of love." He walks back to her and she stands before he reaches to grab her hands. "I have two days left in Leiden. Say the word and I will leave the two of you alone, but if even a little part of you can believe that you are deserving, I will spend the rest of my life making sure you and Aster are loved and cherished."

Her eyes were fixed to their hands as she spoke in a low shaky voice. "I don't know…" as he let go of her hands her heart ached, it wasn't the warmth of a touch she wanted to hold on to, it was him she wanted to hold onto.

"I should get going, I have a long day of work tomorrow." He walked over to the little vanity by the window and wrote down the phone number to his hotel. "If you do know in the next two days…"

He chuckled as he turned to leave. "Please don't make the same mistake as I did all those years ago and send a letter."

She watched from the side of the bed as he left, and sat back down on the side as she heard him ask for the car to be pulled around. As the door opened for him to leave she could hear the torrential downpour outside and stood. She exited her room just as the front door closed behind him. She walked at a hurried pace until she reached the front door, yanking it open to see the back lights of his car pulling away.

Leon kept telling himself to not look back, if she isn't there it will only sting a little more, and now wasn't the time to give up, he wouldn't give up until she told him to. He told himself not to, even as he did, he told himself not to, and when he saw her standing out in the rain he was glad he didn't listen to himself as he asked the driver to stop just in time to yank the car door open.

She was still walking at her quickened pace, and was so determined to reach his car that it took slamming into him to realize he had exited the car.

"What are you doing?" He asks as they both pull away.

She smiled a little out of breath. "Dancing in the rain?"

Leon smirked as the cold autumn rain continued to soak his black hair. "May I dance with you?"

She smiled as they both reached for each other's hands. "Please."

There was no music, no birthday party, no champagne. Only the sound of the rain beating against the ground and their shoulders as they spun in the rain in each other's arms with their foreheads pressed together as their eyes never broke contact.

When they finished their spin and were just swaying for a moment he noticed how she was shivering and pulled her closer. "We should get you inside before you catch a cold." She let out a surprised laugh when he scooped her up again before wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning her head on his shoulder. "Are you going to continue to do this too?" She asked.

"What?" He asked as they came through the front door and he put her feet back on the ground, but keeping her close with his hand on the small of her back.

"Sweep me off my feet?" She asked as the water that drips off of them begins to pool.

He started to smile as he spoke. "Violet—" There was no chance of finishing his statement when she pulled him to her until their lips were about to meet and whispers. "I believe."

He wasn't going to let another thing stop him from kissing her, and neither was she. Their lips meet in a soft kiss that manages to exceed all of his expectations as her hands reach into his hair at the nape of his neck and pull him closer.