Farewell- I

"Here"

"Thankyou"

The red headed man wrapped his fingers around the warm coffee mug that Akio had handed him out before sitting. Until a moment ago everything was still a blur between the older memories and the current ones intervening with one another and things barely made sense.

However when the silence subsided, the two were finally able to look each other in the eye.

"You've grown so much Akio" The man spoke with a nostalgic grief to his voice.

"You haven't changed at all..." Akio told him, though he didn't really mean his appearance by that, but rather the energy that he gave off as a person. It was like nothing had changed in Joshua Hughes from a certain point of life.

Joshua's eyes naturally averted towards the curious girls who couldn't stop looking at him from behind the sofa ever since he'd came in.

"Your daughters are really pretty"

Hearing the word pretty, it was as if Sia and Leah had decided that this man was a good person since he'd called them pretty. Hence they came out excitedly from behind the sofa and quickly ran with their little feet all upto Josh while holding hands.

"I'm Leah! This Sia!" Naturally Leah was the one who introduced herself and her sister first while Sia was more absorbed over the man's weird hair color.

" Red! " Sia pointed, having learned colors quite recently, everything was about colors for Sia.

" I apologize, they're really energetic" Akio still couldn't let go of his formal way of speaking and it wasn't really his fault considering how long it had been.

" Talk normally... " Josh tried to make it seem less awkward than it actually was. He was also smitten by the little girls who were clearly demanding his attention. He'd picked the two up and seated them in his lap.

" Are you little kittens the ones responsible for that"

Josh pointed at Akio whose face and arms were pretty much full of tiny bite marks.

The girls guiltily looked to either sides affirming that it really was them.

"Raising alphas can be pretty hard too I see..." Josh had realized by the energy the two gave off long ago.

"It's quite troublesome..." Akio agreed.

"Your other child..." Josh bought it up, for some reason after all the trouble he'd caused Natsuro he couldn't really dare say his name "I'm sorry...."

Akio couldn't really say anything in response though he'd just nodded with a plain 'hmm'

Originally Akio had alot to say that he'd planned to when he'd finally get to see Joshua Hughes again. However when the time came, he couldn't even utter a single word. It was probably the same for Joshua Hughes himself. He probably came with alot on his mind but when he'd finally seen Akio, he couldn't put it all into words.

There was an awkward silence again before Josh raised his head somehow.

"How could you... forgive him...?"

He'd whispered the last part under his breath.

For a moment there Akio was puzzled what he'd meant and then it all suddenly came back to him.

"We were young" was all Akio could say, this matter was still a huge dilemma for Akio. It didn't matter whether he forgave or not, what had happened couldn't be reversed either way. The only options he had left were either to sit back and lament the past or he could just stand up and walk past the tree outside the zhuang mansion where most of his memories had long been buried and never look behind.

There was yet a long pause again

"I'm sorry..." It was as if Joshua Hughes only knew those words, whenever he'd open his mouth, those words would just slip out without him realizing it.

"I shouldn't have brought it up"

"I don't mind" Akio replied noticing the other man's discomfort and his struggle to make a conversation.

He couldn't help but feel equally nervous too before pulling up the courage to ask

"What... happened...all these years, how are you...?"

Akio couldn't help but stutter while asking, afterall he too was stepping on a landmine that's not supposed to be messed with. However he didn't harbor any ill intentions while doing so; he just thought this man had been a significant part of his childhood. Even if Akio didn't have a biological family to call his own back there, but if he had to call someone his family then it'd be this guy.

Josh, unlike Akio didn't have the courage to say things like 'moving on' or 'we were young'. Infact, there's no way he could have moved on.

How does one move on from something like that in the first place?

Naturally, Josh had no answers, he could only lower his head and violently fiddle with his fingers making his discomfort too obvious for Akio to witness.

It's not that Akio wanted to push on it either, for him he was just scared of not knowing what was about to come out of this tangled mess.

What was the starting point of this? And what is the ending goal?

He had too many questions for his own good and Joshua Hughes looked no way near willing to answer even a single one of them.

In the end Joshua Hughes decided to turn the topic back to Akio, it was better than simply lying about it.

"I cannot understand what it is that you can find so accepting about someone like that, forgiving is one thing..but being with someone like that is-"

It took a moment for Akio to realize something was wrong with what Josh had just said, therefore he interrupted him at the very end of it

" Hold up, I think you're misunderstanding something-"

Akio cut him off having a feeling that Josh probably had it wrong all along though he didn't get to clarify it either yet before a third person interrupted them and the little girls got off from Josh's lap and ran off to the dark headed man.

" Papa...!"

The two of them excitedly ran about to the man who'd just came out of a room and stuck to his legs playfully.

Upon a closer look Josh could see the resemblance. Though the girls did have Akio's naturally blond hair but their features resembled this timid looking man in his late twenties.

"I did forgive him only for the reason that I once loved him, but that doesn't mean he's still my partner, there would be something wrong with my brain if he was" Akio continued from where he'd left off. Kei couldn't make out what this conversation was about and who was this unexpected guest before them, naturally he felt nervous and protectively collected his girls.

"Kei san, come here"

Akio was sharp enough to notice Kei's discomfort in an instant and had called him over to which the other obliged and came over letting the girls free to roam about since Akio looked calm about this person. He just had to trust Akio with something like this.

"This is my partner Uzawa Keitarou"

Akio said taking Keitarou's hand and leading him to sit besides him.

For a moment there Joshua Hughes was struck with a sudden embarassment.

He not only had it all wrong but he had it wrong for such a long time!

Keitarou still had to figure out what this was all about, though the sudden introduction made him somewhat shy as he did a little nod of his head and lowered his eyes with a slight blush on his face. He slightly raised his gaze look at the red headed man before him and then like a shy maiden lowered them again.

"I'm-" Josh conjured up some courage by covering his face within both his hands and taking a deep breath.

"I totally misunderstood" He admitted, after which he moved his hands to take a look of this slim figured man with feral features yet a delicacy about him. He had heard about this man before, he was pretty well known in that regard.

Uzawa Keitarou the former lawyer of the Himari group and the infamous heir of Kirihara estate who had a certain "illness" that rendered him incapable of handling business and had to resign in order to take a long time for recovery.

If only he hadn't known the history of Kirihara Mari that he inevitably had to learn during the course of things with Ian Strauss, he wouldn't have known about the history of this "illness"

A visible gaze of sympathy actually appeared upon Joshua Hughes's face, or probably it was empathy...

He'd automatically developed a sense of likeness towards this man that he had just met yet he dared not bring out any of it.

"I see" The empathetic look upon Joshua Hughes's face gradually got replaced a look of satisfaction.

"Brother..." Akio looked like he had something stuck in his throat that he could barely manage to pull out.

"Moving on...is not such a bad thing..."

Akio spoke those words too cautiously.

What Akio had said did hold merit, yet not for Joshua Hughes. What had happened to Hiromitsu Akio had only happened to him and so he could forgive. What happened to Uzawa Keitarou, had only happened to him and so he could forgive as well.

Both of them had chosen to forgive the ones who had wronged them, it was a "choice"  that only they had the "right"  to make.

But what about Joshua Hughes?

Even if he could forgive what had happened to he himself, then what about Clara Hughes? What about Raina Strauss? What about his three innocent children? They hadn't even properly learned to walk and talk yet?

Who would forgive on their behalf?

Does moving on do them any justice?

"I'm happy to see you happy Akio" Joshua Hughes derailed the subject yet again.

For him, it was too late and too vast to forgive.

Yet another thought hit him related to Naoyuki Zhuang.

"That day... what was that man doing with you here...is he still causing you trouble? If he is I'll definitely make him pay"

Akio felt that in that moment Josh was pretty much like his past self. Actually all that had changed about him was his appearance and aura, the protective personality of his still remained and Akio could see the same worried gaze upon his face that he would two decades back.

"Oh no he was..." Akio paused midway, visibly calculating things in his mind.

If Joshua Hughes mistook Zhuang to be with Akio then it was evident that he had no knowledge of Zhuang being with Alex. Not just that, if Joshua Hughes really didn't know about Zhuang, did he not see Alex at all? How is it possible that he had no contact with Alex? They're father and son, even if not biological, Joshua raised Alex. On the other hand if Alex met Joshua Hughes, there's no way he wouldn't know about him and Naoyuki Zhuang being together. Which led to Akio's next thought...

Does Joshua Hughes really know about Alex? Is it because he doesn't want to see Alex or is it because Joshua Hughes has no knowledge that Alex is still alive?

The moment of silent thinking became longer than he anticipated and Joshua Hughes became impatient.

"What happened?" Joshua Hughes on the other hand assumed that Naoyuki Zhuang really was involved with Hiromitsu Akio somehow and that probably Akio was too scared to reveal that connection.

Kei was even more confused about the whole conversation, he felt completely out of place and definitely didn't know what to do or say. The only thing he was really sure about was that before him was the man called Joshua Hughes. The man who had been a significant part of Akio's childhood. The man who had raised Alex to be who he is today and the man whose past was still a mystery and probably a key to all of these troubles.

"Don't you want...to see Alex...?"

Without giving it much thought unlike Akio, Kei ended up asking an insensitive question without any knowledge of the background. Yet from Kei's perspective, he was only curious as to why the man wouldn't see Alex? Did he hate him? Is it that he can't face him? What happened the day of the accident? How did the whole Hughes family die within one day?

Kei had alot of questions.

However this one question that managed to slip out of his mouth unconsciously turned the whole world of Joshua Hughes upside down and he stared blankly at the man.

Within that moment Akio was nearly sure that Joshua Hughes probably had no idea of Alex Hughes's existence.

Though what Kei suddenly brought up even made Akio startled for a bit and his eyes immediately averted towards Joshua's face to see his reaction.

"What do you mean? How do you know about...?" Joshua Hughes had suddenly turned pale white, it was so evident considering his complexion and moreover the color of his lips was normally a darker shade of red, so them going purple was something even a child would be able to notice.

"Brother Joshua, why did you never go back home?" Akio had no way to answer that question, so he asked another. Indeed he was sure that Joshua didn't know about Alex being alive but it was not like Alex had left his house, so why didn't Joshua figure it out? Why didn't he go back to his house when he came here?

It wasn't that Joshua Hughes couldn't go back home but because he didn't want to go back to an empty house full of memories that felt like short lived sweet dreams that he could no longer tell if they were actually real or just a figment of his imagination.

In the years that Nicolas Strahovski brought Joshua Hughes back, many a times Joshua had turned down the road of his house and yet came back without walking down that road.

He couldn't dare.

Nicolas Strahovski was conscious of this and therefore put a strict control on Joshua, restricting him from going anywhere unnecessary of coming in contact with anyone unnecessary.

He was only allowed to know what Nicolas Strahovski allowed him to know and the rest he didn't care for as he lived like a burnt rag doll.

All these years, mostly alone, Joshua Hughes had intoxicated himself with poisonous memories making him drown so far deep that unlike others, there was no out or a fresh start for him.

Nicolas Strahovski on the other hand had long submerged into it, waiting at the bottom as a silent partner while he extended his hand to Joshua Hughes devoid of any emotions other than anger and revenge.

For one thing both of them loved Clara Hughes , in different ways, yet the they loved her too dearly to let go.

This was the mark that Clara Hughes had left due to her ignorance for those who treasured her.

Who would have thought that even decades after her death she'd be so alive in someone's memory....

"Nicolas Strahovski is too cruel"

Kei was no fool, even though he didn't calculate the consequences of what he did say earlier. However he'd remembered something he'd heard from his sister's mouth and ended up repeating it after he'd figured out what Akio had long figured out.

It suddenly hit Joshua Hughes what Kirihara Mari meant in that moment.

Joshua's ears reverberated with a pitched up noise that blocked out every damn sound in his surroundings.

"Akio..." Joshua Hughes had his moment of silence before he continued after worrying Akio for a while.

"Could you do me a favor?"

The weather became humid again, lately it had been raining alot. Indeed after some while of stiffening humidity, the sky did turn black and before you know it, big droplets began to shower down the sky.

Joshua Hughes looked up, peeking at the sky from his transparent umbrella. He was at the centre watching those big droplets fall down with great force but being slowed down once they hit the surface of the umbrella and trailed along before dripping from it's corners and hitting the ground. It must be tormenting for them too, to have been blocked by such a hurdle when they were so impatiently falling from the sky hoping to be devoured by the ground.

Joshua Hughes too had been blocked for such a long while, however it was finally time for him to be one with his fate.

It was time.

He cast aside the umbrella and got himself soaked in rain for his final bathing.

"Who tf are you?" A voice finally made him step out of his zone and he looked forward at the huge gate before him, the gate he meant to break. The man spat some heavy words at Joshua but once again he could only hear a long pitched beep before he subconsciously ended up punching the guy breaking his nose into a bloody shower.

"You're finally here" Amidst that bleep, he saw a slim figure dressed in white standing by the door as if in wait. Her blurry features became more prominent as he neared in across the screen of heavy rain.

Those feline eyes and that sharp gaze, those long wavy black hair strands soaked down to stick against her pale skin. Those dark red full lip with water trailing down their corners.

A figure of immense desire and regret for him.

"Clara" he'd whispered in a daze before a light smile appeared to curve the edges of her lips. He was out of it yet again as he walked forward following her trail.

Slowly she ran forward as she merged into the big iron gate of the warehouse while he made subconscious movements clearing out the people who came blocking his way only to lay flat in red on the ground.

Joshua Hughes was violent. Violent for this woman he cherished so dearly.

He couldn't hear any of their screams or voices apart from chasing her apparition down the door. Only when the door opened, he could finally pay attention to others around him.

Nicolas Strahovski was an obstinate man with alot of will power and stubbornness. He never once gave into the enemy or let them feel satisfied over his helplessness... however in that very moment, the way he raised his pitiful gaze to look at the redhead before him was beyond frustrating and painful to even watch.

Joshua Hughes just couldn't help feel his heart sink and his own body shiver seeing the whole scenario.

"No..." Nicolas whispered in a low tone, implying that this was the worst decision on Josh's behalf. The humiliation he felt just by Josh being there couldn't have been conjured by those who tortured him. He felt that all his effort of keeping silent and protecting the other had just been wasted down the drain.

What was the point of all this suffering if the rabbit hopped into the booby trap all on his own?

He looked at Josh with a both scornful and a detestable gaze. It almost sent shivers down Josh's spine.

Nicolas indeed had his own ways but he wasn't the only one was he?

How long could've Josh just sat back and waited? Till he'd hear the death of another one in his life? Or probably not even that?

"It doesn't matter" Josh spoke with a dull expression.

It really didn't matter....

In the next moment he was surrounded again. That was really nothing for him at this point, Joshua Hughes had been held down by six men once and after that one time not even twelve could ever hold him down again, he made sure of that.

He only gave the other a brief smile as if reassuring him that he's got everything in control before he dropped down on his knees and rested his hands behind his head in a surrender.

The show had already reached it's climax and there was barely anything holding Joshua Hughes back from implementing his revenge.

The time that had stopped back then for Joshua Hughes had started ticking back to countdown.

Nicolas could only barely see the other man with one of his less swollen eyes.

"It's okay, it doesn't matter" Joshua Hughes reassured him yet again before slowly lowering his arms and slowly opening his jacket. The men who had their guns pointed at him all became vary and within a few seconds, all of them ran out yelling something loudly.

Though neither Joshua nor Nicolas could hear either of them. All they did was look intensely at each other.

Nicolas Strahovski sitting there stranded with tied up hands and broken dysfunctional legs while Joshua Hughes on his knees laden with explosives under his jacket.

Somewhere under the dark shade of light over a study table, someone chipped open an envelope and unfolded the clumsily folded paper which was a bit crumpled up showing that maybe the writer crunched it up once or twice before actually deciding to resettle it. There were also dried up droplet marks here and there being evident of the writer's state of mood when he wrote it.

The reader sat down before finally lifting the paper between his fingers.

'Dear Alex...'