Chapter 25 - Tatalsikan Kitang Muli

"Congrats ulit, Mecky!" paunang bati ko sa unang araw ng second sem. Umakbay-akap agad ako sa nagantay sa aking si Mecky sa usual spot namin sa labas ng library. She looked rather radiant, and she wore her eyeglasses again this time like she used to in junior high.

"Ok na, paulit-ulit ka naman eh. Unli lang?" nahihiyang tugon niya.

"Syempre, happy lang ako for you. Proud din ako no, na bestfriend ko ang tanging nakasagot sa pinakamahirap na tanong."

Nahiya siya lalo at kumunot ang labi niya. "Sus! If you were there, masasagot mo rin naman yun. And kung ikaw, baka nagchampion pa tayo."

"Ano ka ba! Wag ka ngang ganyan. Sa 61 countries na naglaban-laban, isa ka sa apat na nanalo. First place?! Super achievement yun no. Bitbit mo ang bandera ng pilipinas, dapat bbe proud 'di ba?"

She smiled, shy. I was genuinely happy na may naiuwing tropeyo si Mecky. When it was confirmed that it was Mecky and sir Albert who replaced me and Teacher Kim, panay ang sorry ni Mecky sa'kin. All the while that I was preparing, secretly, sabay na nagpeprepare rin pala sila ni sir Albert. They were sworn by Principal Moon to strictly not inform us of the back-up plan, para daw sure na ang pressure, dedication at focus namin ni Teacher Kim would be solid.

After that sad, grey, rainy day and I was told I was no longer in the competition, everything else fell apart. Nothing was ever the same.

My parents called for a family meeting the end of that week. It was the most painfully awkward situation that I have ever been in. My brothers and I knew what we knew, but none of us admitted to the truth to our parents. I felt na pinoprotektahan talaga ako ng mga kuya ko. If my parents ever find out about Teacher Kim, it will be total chaos, armageddon.

That day too, Teacher Kim and I had a major fight, that still, ended in a sadistic, most merciless sex we've ever had. He wanted to come clean and admit our relationship, but I wasn't ready. We both admitted, however, that we don't want to lose each other. But, the complications was just too much for me to handle. I cried as heavy as the rain that day.

Teacher Kim and I decided to take the time off during sem break and have everything figured out on our own terms, our own time, our own way. Then we agreed that we will discuss it again when school resumed.

It wasn't easy. I cried every night the entire sem break, and he would call me every day, multiple times a day. Only twice I answered his call: one, when I was drunking alone in my bedroom, I drunk texted him, so he called; the second time, he texted that he was parked, again, outside my house, under the heavy rains of a signal #3 typhoon, so I answered his call.

I was never myself again, my brothers noticed that. They tried to cheer me up with their jokes and banters, with shopping, food trips, movie bonding with all the five of us, but to no avail. I was just glad, they didn't take further actions that could have made everything more complicated.

"So, how's Teacher Kim? I mean, have you talked to him?" bigla naman akong napalingon kay Mecky. We were sitting outside the library waiting for Balong. May pasalubong daw kasi siya from Japan.

"Once, or twice. I think he's fine."

"He's going to be our Teacher again, three subjects, so halos buong araw, twice a week, siya ang teacher natin. You ok with that?"

"Like I have a choice? Sana, this time, matigil na ang mga asar at tanong ng mga tsismosa't intrigera. He's our teacher, super awkward kaya."

"Well, I think, it was smart that you both ignored it. If you reacted kasi, you might just appear guilty."

Napatingin ulit ako kay Mecky, this time, mas malalim. "Do you believe it, Mecks? The rumors?"

She paused and peered to the lower corner of her eyes. "Hmmmm, I chose to believe you. But it would be nice if there is, really someone out there as, you know, the real mystery prince. I mean, that grand romantic gesture is still, a story of lifetime. It will go down in this school's history as the legendary mystery of the butterfly princess."

I smiled, lighthearted. "You know what I realised? Hindi ko pa pala napapanood ang mga videos."

"Better don't. Wag mo na panoorin. It is best that you just, remember that moment, your moment, the way you had it, when there was only magic... and love."

❧ ❧ ❧

Hindi na ulit magkandamayaw ang tilian sa hallway ng mga nakamiss kay Teacher Kim. Napailing na lang ako. I thought, it should be rude, or disruptive, even reflective of an improper character to openly fawn over a teacher; students should not behave this way, pero tila ba naging normal na lang ito sa eskwelahan ko, lalo na't dahil sa trending ultimate heartthrob teacher na mayroon kami.

"Hello, again. Good morning."

Mayroong isang bagsak ng tilian sa klase ng pumasok si Teacher Kim. Mga mata namin ang unang nagtagpo pagpasok na pagpasok niya. He was such a picturesque view of paradise, a stunning statue of a Greek God, para bang may epekto siya ng literal na pagkamangha mula sa mga nakakakita sa kaniya.

His height, his posture, the cultured confidence of his steps, the elegant strides of his legs, the brusque thickness of his hands, the appetizing tones of muscles in his arms, the powerful built of his shoulder, the firm roundness of his chest, the Roman eminence of his nose, the maleficent of his pinkish-red lips, his enchanting gaze, his charming thick brows, and his seductive jawline - everything about him was impossible, yet there we were, captivated by him as he walked towards his table. And then, there it was too, of course, the exciting mystery of his bulge, but I know already exactly the greatness of what was hidden in it.

"Fun sem break, isn't it?" the sex god asked.

Sinagot siya ng ngiti bilang pagsangayon ng karamihan sa klase, but I heard the dry tone in his question. No, I am sure, he didn't have a fun sem break at all.

And just like everything was normal, he continued with his nakakagwapong humor throughout the day. Out of seven hours of class for the day, five hours was his; three subjects, Statistics and Probability, Basic Calculus, and General Chemistry. Not only was he physically perfect, he also had an above average intelligence. Sobra na, sobra na talaga siya.

Since that one perfect day, nakaugalian ko na rin bumalik, tumulala sa malayo at magmuni-muni sa rooftop ng main building. I haven't told Teacher Kim about it, at pasalamat na lang ako at pinagbibigyan ako ni kuya Monki.

"A penny for your thoughts?"

I gasped deep, I was startled. Pero agad ko ring napagtanto na si Teacher Kim ang biglang sumulpot sa likod ko. I felt him behind my back, his head pressed behind me, sniffing my nape.

"My thoughts cost more than a penny. Try like a million.. or ten million. Or.. how much is your inherited wealth?"

I heard him chuckled. "How about a fuck, or two, or an endless fuck? That work, love?"

Humarap na'ko. "In what currency? You?"

"Who else? Why, are you accepting a different currency now?"

"Maybe.. I heard the british pound is falling."

"Oh, it has fallen. Fallen in love with you."

I rolled my eyes at the cheesy humor but still grinned with kilig. "How much cheese have you eaten today?"

"None. I was hoping I could eat you."

Humarap ako sa kaniya and it was like hearts and flowers, teddy bears and valentines day rolled into one, masked all over his face. Natunaw ako.

Then, his expression darkened. "Did you have enought time.. to, think?"

"Mm, yea. You?"

"I can only think of you."

"Me too, you."

I felt a surge of electricity flowed throughout my body when his lips touched my skin, he kissed me on my forehead. We were so close, I was lost, again, in his intoxicating scent.

"Cece, I meant when I told you, I will do anything for you."

"But if feels like we are fighting a battle that we will never win."

A small smile crept up his face. "That's love, Cece. It isn't meant to be easy."

"What do you know? I thought I am your first love? That this is both our first."

"You are. It is. But you don't only learn from past experiences, Cece, you also learn in your present, as you go through it. Like Math."

"Only if our situation is as easy as Math," I say wistfully. I walked towards the platform we danced before. He followed.

"Math is never easy, love. It will never be. You only think it is because you're not afraid of it, of trying, failing, and trying again.

"But Math has standard methods, formulas. Love doesn't."

"Oh, it does. If you are loyal, then you're not a cheater. If you give flowers, chocolates, hearts and kisses, you're a good boyfriend. If you listen and don't make things complicated, you're a good girlfriend. The thing is, people know how to do love, just often, people are afraid of the process."

He lifted my hands up his shoulders, held my waist and kissed my forehead again. He started swaying lightly, like we were dancing again.

"Don't give up on me yet, Cece."

I looked up at him, paused for a moment. "Why me? What did I do to make you fall in love with me?"

"I told you before, I don't know how, why, what. I just did. I just do."

"How sure are you, you're inlove with me?"

"How sure are you, you are inlove with me?"

"I'm in high school. They say, in high school you would always know that you have fallen in love, that you are inlove."

He chuckled. "That must be it then. I'm in high school too."

We both laugh. Then he leaned and kissed me; a soft, fluid, romantic kiss.

"I don't want to give up, Chri -- Teach -- Christopher."

"Good, brill!"

"But my parents can't know. It would completely change my world, my life. Sila kuya, alam na nila, but only kuya Japo figured out that we, that, we-that, uhm, that I'm not the same Cece as I was. I will never be anymore."

He took a deep breath and exhaled slow and subtle. "Can I promise to marry you someday?"

"What!?"

He laughed. "Shocker?"

"Marry!?"

"Not now, or soon. You still have to go to college, get a job, so you can support me. You know, make a living for both of us."

I smack his chest, he giggled. "You live on top of the highest building in the country. You inherited a fortune. You're filthy rich! I'd say I won the lottery marrying you, I don't have to work at all and I'll just, buy everything Hermes," I sneered.

"Oh, that. I'm gonna waste it on gambling, and drinking, and prostitutes, and high maintenance mistresses that you will never know about. You gotta work your arse to keep me as your boy toy."

"Really? Hmmm, I guess we better break up now. I don't like gambling."

"That's your concern, my future gambling addiction?"

"Yea, gambling is a complete no-no."

"How about, prostitutes and mistresses?"

"If you can hide it well. Tho, of course, I'll always find out. And I'll cut your dick off."

"I love you."

❧ ❧ ❧

The rest of the first week of second sem went smoothly. I was glad the rumors about me has subsided, they turned talking about someone else. I chose to ignore the other rumors, I know what it was like to be the subject of made up stories, prying and fake news. I've never really cared about it, I didn't realised that this rumor mongering has been going on longer than I have been in this school.

"Oy, Cece. Namooh-mutlah ka. Saw a ghost? Well, you kindda look like you've just been fucked. Sex at school is fun but --"

"You! Balong! You and your dirty mouth talaga. Pinagsasabi mo!"

"Aray! What? Nanah-nakeet ka nah ngayohn ha. Tsk. Non virgins are brutal talagah."

Hinampas ko ulit si Balong at napalakas na. Pabigla-bigla na lang talaga kung sumulpot ito si Balong. "Pwede, lower your voice? At anong non virgin ka dyan! Gawa-gawa ka rin kwento eh no? Mauna ka na nga! Cutting ka na naman!"

"I always know, Cece. Roses are blue, violets are green, I can smell it from you, you're no longer a virgin."

"Balong ka talaga!"

"Aray! Aray koh namahn! Grabeh ka nah ha. E, bahkit eekaw, you're also not in class ah. Cutting kah den. Hmf!"

"Excuse me no. I excused myself para mag-cr!"

"Sa third floor?! -- Ah, that's why you looked flushed. You saw the gay ghost no? May bahklang multo daw sa third floor e."

"Ewan ko sayo! Maghanap ka ng multong makakausap. I don't see you. You're not existing."

"Mahldeeta ka nah ngayohn. You've changed, Cece, you've changed," he insisted, shaking his head with such conviction.

I continued ignoring him until we parted ways sa fifth floor. Then I ignored everything else, went back to class and focused.

Iyun nga lang, ang hirap na rin magfocus sa klase. My boyfriend is my teacher, and I haven't had sex with him for quite sometime. I actually had to excuse myself again, for the third time, and it's only been the first half of the day, because I felt wetness in my pussy. It wasn't comfortable, I wanted to wash and change undies.

I wonder, I'm always wet, maybe it's a disorder or something. But then again, it was only because of Teacher Kim, his sexual and arousing effect is undeniable. It couldn't be just happening to me, all the other girls often looked like they were drooling too; it has always been a funny sight to me, most of them just couldn't hide it. But, I know I must have looked like them too several times last sem.

"You know, you could stop wearing panties," biglang sulpot at bulong naman ni Teacher Kim. Tho, I've expected he'll be somewhere here in the library too.

I gasped, I felt his warm breath behind my ear. But I wanted to keep my cool so I continued browsing for books from the shelves. "I'm wearing a skirt. And could you please? Mecky is somewhere around too."

"I know why you've excuse yourself too many times during my class. Do I make you wet, Cece?"

"I wanted to keep myself fresh. I wash up and change into fresh panties."

"I'm telling you now, to stop doing that."

Napalingon ako bigla sa kaniya while he was pretending to be browsing for books too. "What? Stop washing myself fresh? No," I shook my head with sly grin.

"Yes. Cece. Stop washing. I'd like the accumulated wetness in your pussy. It would taste divine. And would you please give me your panties? I want it. And next time, better, just don't wear them at all, ok?"

"You... are a disgusting british."

"You love me anyway. See you at the dungeon in ten. I will fuck you, hard."

I gasped deep and rough when he grabbed my pussy underneath my skirt. With brutish effort, he pulled the front of my panties to the side and his fingers roughly played the lips of my entrance. I inhaled hot and cold air; I missed the sensation, it was as if my pussy recognized his hand and fingers.

Then, in another swift effort, his finger slid inside me. Napakapit ako sa matigas niyang braso na siyang nakahawak sa hiwa ko. Naglabas-pasok ang daliri niya sa butas ko at sagad niya pang idinidiin ito. Sumunod ay dalawang daliri na niya, at napaungol na ako pero sabay ding takip ko ng kamay ko sa bibig ko.

"You're so wet. Already? Oh, Cece."

"Stop. This is.. no, not here. Stop."

"So warm and tight."

"Chri-christopher, s-st-stop!" I hissed.

Roughly, he quickly pulled his fingers and his hand out. I regretably ached at the longing pleasure, but I did asked him to stopped. He gaped at me, then he kissed me, sucking my lips. It was abrupt, then he walked out.

Para akong natalsikan ng tubig sa daan; yung may biglang dumaang sasakyan, nakatayo ka sa kanto, tapos natalsikan ka ng tubig ng konting baha; nagulat ka na lang, hindi ka makapaniwala, gusto mong magalit, pero basa ka na at wala na yung sasakyan.

With few head shakes, I got myself back to reality. Ok, so we were gonna have sex in ten minutes, I was excited. Then I turned my head to the other side of the shelve and saw a girl in a boho outfit, frozen in shock.

"Mecky!"

I felt buckets of ice-cold water was being poured over me. My eyes rounded big, I couldn't find my breathing pattern, like I stopped breathing but I know I was breathing. Lumapit ako kay Mecky. "Me-mem-mecky, err, uhm."

"Cece. What, I, ano, oo, ha?"

"Mecky, did you.. err, uhm. Ano, kasi, it's -- "

"Sige, oo. Ok. Ganun nga. Ha? Oo. Ano yun?"

Pareho kaming natuliro. Mecky lifted her point finger signaling something behind her, only she wasn't really, there wasn't any, she was just obviously stupefied. Then she turned around, about to walk-out, but her mind seemed to be lost."

"Mecky, wait," I grabbed her wrist.

"I.. I-need-a-beer," she said, sounding a little innocent but her face looked matter-of-factly.

"B-bb-beer? Where? How?"

She swallowed, her eyes were blinking rapidly. Para namang hinuhugot ang bituka ko mula sa bibig ko.

"Friday's. There's a T.G.I Friday's outside our school. Friday's."

"Oh-ok. Friday's then. Beer. Tara. I need a beer too."

"You don't drink, Cece."

"I'd, uhm, I will now."

Despite us both being flabbergasted, we got ourselves out and into the bar area of the restaurant. Then I realised a major problem, who would let us buy alcohol? I mean, Mecky was not as child-looking as I am, but she doesn't look very adult either.

"I'll have Erdinger, please," agad na order ni Mecky pagkaupo namin. Tumaas naman ang dalawang kilay ng bartender.

"Beer? This early? Major stress at the office?" sarkastikong tanong naman ng bartender.

Mecky's face dulled. "Yea. A hundred stock piles of financial reports, can you handle? Asan na pala si Beks?"

"Ay bakla! Andito ka pala. Sige na, Junjun, ako na bahala sa kanila. Keribels ko na 'to."

Pumasok ang isang payat at matangkad na lalaki sa loob ng bar. It was obvious na beki nga siya dahil sa pink butterfly hairclip niya sa maikli naman niyang bangs.

"Ay, nakakaloka. Ikaw pala butterfly princess! O, pak, idol kita, see my hair clip?"

I forced a smile. Nakikita ko na siya sa school, alam kong Grade 12 na siya dahil kabarkada niya si Joey Lina, isa pang sikat na crush ng bayan.

"Beks, beer?"

"Mecky Elisabeth Herher, may araw pa, beer ka na? Ano, Erdinger ulet?"

Tumango si Mecky. "Sino yung bagong bartender?"

"Ay, si Junjun. Bet no? Pak na pak sa sarap eh. Isang buwang reliever ni Clarence, galing siya ibang branch... sana nga 'wag na bumalik si Clarence eh."

"Baliw. Panay nga utang mo dun e. Eh, dyan sa.. bagong Junjun mo, mukhang ikaw pa gagastos."

"Hooy, bakla, excuse me. I will never.. make gastos, sa mga lalake no. Swerte nila huh, sa sarap kong 'to, dapat nga may sukli pa ako. O, eto na beer mo."

Napatingin naman sa'kin si Beks. "Ay, nakakaloka. Ikaw, butterfly princess, beer ka rin?"

"Errm, Guinness?"

"Sure.. ito oh, agad-agad."

"Beks, can we have a moment muna? May paguusapan lang kami."

Mukhang nacurious agad si Beks sa pakiusap ni Mecky. Pero nag 'meh' face lang si Mecky sa kaniya.

"Ay, is it about the mystery prince?"

"Beks..."

"Ok fine. Hindi naman ako tsismosa. Magpapaka-alipin na lang muna ako dito, call me if you need anything."

Umiling na lang kami ni Mecky at sabay napangiti sa mga eksaheradang kilos ni Beks.

Mukha namang umipekto na ang beer kay Mecky, nakakatingin na siya sa'kin ng diretso. Huminga siya ng malalim at umisang lagok ulit ng beer. "So.."

"Yea, so..."

"Cece, I wasn't shocked that it was him. I just, I, I never thought, or would I ever imagine, I would see something like that in the library. Gahhh, hindi na ata mabubura sa utak ko 'yung nakita ko."

I was even more dumbfounded. "Hindi ka nagulat.. na siya?"

"Well, I didn't really want to believe the rumors. I told you, I believe you. But, he's been the only guy you've ever been linked with. Sinasabi mo naman sakin usually if someone asked you na gusto ka ligawan, until the mystery prince. Actually, I was hurt a little, pero ok lang. I never cared about tsismis naman eh.

"Well, you see now, why it's complicated?"

She took another gulp of beer as I did too. "Yea, and a lot more. But, Cece, is this serious?"

Napaisip ako ng matagal, madami-dami rin ang nalagok kong beer. Bumalik si Beks for another round of beer. Naramdaman ko na 'yung unang bote, pero gusto ko pa. Twice or thrice, pinainom ako nila kuya nang minsang naginuman sila sa bahay, pero isang bote pa lang, feeling ko lasing na ko.

"Sa tingin ko," alangang sagot ko. "I fell in love, Mecks. Feeling ko nga, all this time, I've been having adult problems na."

"You're not a child, Cece. Everyone's been treating you like one, kaya minsan you act like one. But, you're way too smart, " she took another gulp. "Except this, tho."

"Huh?"

"Are you sure about him? How deep in love are you?"

"Deep. All the way deep. He got me, Mecks, all of me."

Napapaisip naman na ako sa wary expression ni Mecky, parang hindi siya kumportable sa katotohanang isinisiwalat ko. But of course, who would be?

"I know, this is wrong on all sides, Mecks. I can't ask you to understand, just, don't tell anyone?"

"I'm never.. no, Cece, hindi ko gagawin yun sayo. It is your secret to tell, or keep. And, I completely understand more than you think I do. Minsan, wala lang talagang warning kung kailan at kanino tayo maiinlove. At kapag nainlove ka na, wala nang tama at mali, ang alam mo na lang, mahal mo siya."

I smiled, gumaan ang puso ko. "Yun lang, kapag sinampal ka na ng tama at mali, complicated na, hindi na sapat yung mahal mo lang siya."

"You're like, super smart, Cece. You'll know what to do."

"I don't think nagagamit ang talino sa love, Mecks. I honestly don't know what to do, how long I could keep this."

"You looked.. happy, with him -- gaaahhhh! Naalala ko na naman."

I grimaced, embarrased. "Sorry, that was awful. How much did you see ba?"

"Everything! Since, he said he will -- wait, what's the dungeon?"

"Oh my god. Everything nga. Don't ask, I don't think I can ever tell. He's, he is very, he has.. he's naughty."

Mecky laughed dryly. "That he is! Kaya nga nakarami siya ng anak."

"What???"