Regret

Kei stares at Sam's sleeping face, not a trace of distress left. He brushes a strand of hair behind her ear absentmindedly. He can't help but think about her words earlier and the events from thirteen years ago. He remembers that cursed day as if it were yesterday.

He sighs.

He remembers when Sam came downstairs that morning, she was as pale as a sheet. She grabbed some cereal and went to sit on the couch, so all he could see was the back of her head.

Kei was nervous, he unconsciously played with his cold scrambled eggs as he rehearsed what he had to say in his head. The chances that things would work out were very slim, but he had to try one last time.

"Hello?" He answered his phone immediately.

"Hello, Kei," his grandfather greeted on the other side. "You received word of today's meeting, right?"

"Of course."

"I do not need to remind you of how important it is."

"Yes."

Riyota was silent for a moment. "And you are taking care of that personal matter today as well?"

Kei squeezed his phone. "Yes," he uttered.

"Great, then I will see you later."

He pushed to his feet and walked toward Sam.

"I have to go somewhere, but I will be back before the appointment." She looked at him with questioning eyes but she didn't ask anything.

Kei wanted to tell her what he was planning, but he didn't want to get her hopes up.

"Fine." Was all she said.

He arrived at his grandfather's office half an hour early. He was glad no one else got there before him.

"Kei? You are early, boy." Ryota said.

"I wanted to talk to you before the meeting."

Ryota stood from his desk and walked to one of the sofas by the window. "Well then, let's hear it."

Kei stared at his grandfather for a moment before he got on his knees.

"What are you–"

"Grandfather, I am begging you," Kei interrupted. "I will do whatever you want me to do, I will marry Miss Watanabe, I will work for the company until the day I die." He swallowed the lump in his throat. "Please, let Samantha keep the baby. That innocent life has nothing to do with this."

Ryota was silent for a moment. "I thought we already had this conversation and came to a decision."

"You made the decision, Sam would never do those things."

"Even if she doesn't, having a child from another woman would always be a threat to your marriage."

"I will send her and the baby to America and provide for them financially, I will even make Samantha sign documents so they can never come after your money. Please, Grandfather, I implore you."

"You are more pathetic than I thought." Ryota's words made him flinch. "Get up before someone sees an Ichihara on the floor, begging."

"Grandfather, please–"

"I said get up," Ryota roared.

Kei pushed to his feet as his hope slowly faded.

"The decision is already made. Do you think those Watanabe leeches would keep quiet if they knew their daughter's position was threatened?"

"I know that if Ryota Ichihara gave the order, no one would dare speak against it," Kei said with challenging eyes.

"I plan on doing no such a thing." Ryota sat back in his chair with a scornful look. "Be grateful that I allowed you and your parents to remain part of this family. You should focus on working on your end of the deal. Surely, you know that I do not keep useless people around."

Kei's nails dug into his palms. He had failed miserably.

'Maybe there is still time to just run away. Go back to America, fuck the Ichihara busisness.'

"I know what you're thinking, boy," Ryota uttered. "If you disobey me and ruin this deal because of your childish feelings, I will come after everyone you love." He placed his elbows on his knees and leaned forward. "And trust me, there is nowhere in this world where you can hide from me."

Kei clenched his jaw as he thought hard. This was just another proof of how heartless his grandfather was. He believed each one of his words since he saw what he was capable of with his own eyes.

"Now, go get ready for our meeting."

IT WAS ONE THIRTY when Kei realized that the meeting was going to take longer than planned. He was not going to make it to Sam's appointment. He excused himself to make a call under his grandfather's glaring eyes.

"Hey Jiro, I have a favor to ask," he said when his brother picked up.

"What's up?"

"I need you to go to the address I am going to text you, it's a clinic. Sam is there."

"What? Is she okay?"

"She's… getting an abortion."

Jiro was silent for a moment. "Are you fucking serious right now?" he hissed.

"I can't make it, Jiro, I am stuck at a meeting with grandfather."

"You can't make it?" Jiro was enraged. "Like you're getting a fucking haircut or something. You have to be there–"

"I know," Kei yelled. "I know I am the worst, the lowest of the lowest. But I am too fucking weak." His voice cracked. "I tried, Jiro. I tried to spare her, I tried to fix it… but I can't, not without getting more people hurt."

"You know mom and dad don't care about the money if it means you will live miserably for the rest of your life."

"Oh Jiro." Kei gave a rueful chuckle. "We are way past that, he threatened to hurt everyone I love." He was silent for a moment. "If you love Sam, please go be there for her. I know she would rather have you there than the guy who condemned our child."

"I will go, Brother, I just hope you won't regret this."

'Of course I regret it.' Kei takes Sam's hand in his and brings it to his forehead. 'I regret it every day.'

"Do you resent me for having a child with Hana?" he whispers. "Hell, I even know that I don't deserve to have Yuta. Will you ever forgive me, Sam?"