54- A Cole Scented Truth

"Do you think she's going to be alright?" Tau asked Cole as he finished folding up the sheet.

"Of course. Why do you ask?"

"Because of what she described from her dream. It sounded like the cleansing pools and the river of life in the land of the dead."

"Oh," Cole responded as he crossed his arms and looked over at Quayleigh, who was fast asleep on the couch. "I suppose anything be possible, but I think that's more of a coincidence than anything."

"I suppose you're right. I have spoken to her about them. What makes me wonder though, is I never told her that the river has no reflection," Tau replied as Cole move to her bed, folded back the sheets and fluffed up her pillow.

"Okay cher, time for bed," Cole muttered as he leaned over and picked her up off the couch.

Carrying her over to the bed, he placed her down and adjusted the blanket over her feet, before tucking her in.

Stepping around Uroxuz, Tau set the folded sheet onto the couch and watched with a great curiosity as Cole knelt down next to the bed, and deftly swept her hair back behind her ear.

"You tell her I said goodnight when she wakes up, okay?"

"I will, but I'm curious. The way you treat her. Are you in love with her too?"

Cole chuckled quietly as he stood up and motioned towards the couch, "My friend, there be more than one way to love someone." Tau sat down as Cole continued to talk while heading into the kitchen. "That being said, I do. Even if you haven't figured it all out yet, I can tell you, I don't love her the way you do. Nor do I love her the way she loves you."

"I don't understand what the difference is," Tau said as Cole returned to the couch with two bottles of water holding one out to him.

Taking the bottle, he removed the cap as Cole sat down on the other end of the couch.

"That's not surprising. Took me a while to figure it all out too," Cole remarked with a half-smile. "I've had my fair share of loves in my life, and each one been different to some degree. I've even had a few that were similar to the one the two of you share. For me though, they never end well. Soon as the woman starts realizing that I don't age like I should, they start wanting to know my secrets, and inevitably I have to leave."

"I'll have to leave her one day. Is that why I can love her like this, and you don't?"

"No, no, that's nothing to do with it. When you look at her, you see something I don't. You see a partner, and I see a friend. Wasn't always like that though. Her and I, we started out different. The moment I first saw her, she reminded me of the sister, I lost so very long ago. Like her, she was blind in one eye, but Lacey had been born that way. She had a genetic defect, that made her frail. She looked like a skeleton whose skin didn't fit quite right. Her teeth were crooked, because her jaw was too small, and they yellowed because she couldn't close her lips around them. She wasn't beautiful on the outside, and people treated her unfairly, cruelly even, but that never stopped her from always smiling. If anyone took the time to get to know her, they soon realized she had a heart as big as the sun, and it was made of pure gold. I wanted others to see what I did; to make her outsides match what she was on the inside."

"That's why you sold your soul?" Tau asked as Cole opened his bottle of water and took a drink, nodding as he swallowed.

"That be why."

"Did you learn what you wanted?"

"I did. I got the answers and so much more. The thing was, the answer wasn't what I expected, and I felt cheated, and horribly robbed of what was mine. Such is the nature of dealing with gods and devils."

"Could you not help your sister with what you had learned?"

"I could, but not the way I had hoped. The ritual I could have used would have done exactly what I wanted. It would have taken her inner beauty and put it on the outside, making her gorgeous beyond comprehension, but ultimately empty on the inside. It would have destroyed who she was. Not that I could have cast it on her, even if she had wanted it. Her heart never would have been able to withstand the procedure. So instead, I did what I could. I prettied up her hair and straightened her teeth. I even made it so her nails would grow strong and healthy. But the one thing that made her cry, was when I put a permanent illusion over her eye so to everyone else, it would look identical to her other. She died at twenty-two, married to a man that genuinely loved her."

"And you didn't love your sister the same way he did?"

"Exactly. I loved her as a brother should. The same way I love Quayleigh. All I want for her is to be happy, healthy, and safe. It's why I started training her in the first place," he said before taking another drink.

"Can I ask you about those days?"

"What do you want to know?"

"Did you know Tim?"

"I did."

"Did you know what he was doing to her?"

He watched as Cole took a breath and put the cap back on his bottle.

"The first time he came into my shop, he had a list. I took the order, he paid, and came back the following day to pick it up. We barely spoke, but I did ask him about what the items were for. He told me that they were a gift for his foster daughter. He said that she had asked for them. I thought it odd at the time, that a man that young would be buying such expensive gifts for a kid that wasn't even his, but people do all sorts of things for all sorts of reasons. I probably wouldn't have thought much of it at all, but based on the items, neither he nor his foster child, knew much about magic. I was concerned, so I warned him about the dangers of amateurs using ritual magics and asked him to bring her to see me. I told him I often gave private lessons to ensure the safety of the curious. I can remember him laughing it off, and that didn't sit right with me either."

"Did he bring her with him the next time he came in?"

"No. The next time I remember him coming in, he made a rather unusual inquiry. He asked about used books. He wanted to know where he could buy or borrow them from. I only remember because the way he phrased it was as if he was asking for something illegal. I showed him the collection of books I had for sale at the shop and told him I could find others through my network if he knew what it was that he was looking for, and again, he told me it was for his foster daughter. I told him that she would have to come in for at least some training then, either with me or with a MET certified teacher, because he would just be wasting his money. Without training, she wouldn't be able to read the language. When I saw his reaction, the frustration he showed, and then he said something that stuck with me for a long time. He said, it was getting to the point where she wasn't worth the expense. I didn't know why that bothered me at the time, but I'm glad that it did. I told him that it wasn't no expense, if he bought the books from me, I would train her free of charge, and that I would reach out to my book dealer, find out if he could send over used and damaged books for large discounts, if not for the cost of shipping. And that seemed to be music to his ears."

"So, he brought her in to meet you?"

"That he did. She was barely thirteen. Pretty little thing with pigtails and wonder dancing in her eye as she just stood in the entrance and looked all around her. Then I saw the scar, and I thought of Lacey. When he brought her over to the counter to pick up the order from the previous day, I was intrigued; what could such a young girl be doing messing with components like those? So, I asked, and she told me that she had made a spell to talk to someone far away. I was impressed to say the least, but she had plenty of room for improvement. I asked her if she would let me teach her a better way. She jumped at the opportunity and turned to that bastard and right in front of me, she said, 'About earlier, we have a deal.' There was something about the way he looked at her when she said that that made my blood run cold. If I had known the truth about what he was doing…" Cole took a sharp breath in and set down the bottle he had been holding before clenching his fist.

"Would you have stopped him?"

Cole shook his head and ran his hand up over the top of his head.

"You listen here, Tau, what I'm about to tell you, it stays between us. You understand me?"

Tau nodded and watched as Cole took another deep breath before adjusting himself further back onto the couch.

"It took three years for her to trust me enough to tell me the truth of what was happening to her. For three years I had my suspicions but couldn't do a damn thing to prove it. I did what I could though. I kept her close. Let her work around the store after school, and I trained her on Saturdays, just as I had promised. She had a real passion for practices. She had managed to teach herself more than I had expected, and I could see that she had a true affinity for the work. I convinced Tim that it was in her best interest if he allowed me to train her full time. I told him that I would make her my apprentice, so she could prepare and take the entrance exam at the MET when she turned fourteen. If she would have passed, she would have been able to start in the summer semester. I thought, even if I couldn't prove that something was going on between them, I could at least ensure that she was far away from him. I don't know if it was her situation or if Tim pressured her, but clearly, she never took the exam. She did, however, take me up on the offer for the extra training and ended up at the shop on the weekends with me. I tried to convince her a few times, but she never applied to the MET. Can't say I blame her, not really. To many regulations and locked doors, although I'm certain she had her own reasons for it. She still had time to change her mind, but I agreed that it was best if she remained unregistered since she was certain that was never going to happen."

"If you knew, why didn't you do more for her after she refused to take the exam?"

"You're wrong. I didn't know. Not for certain, and I couldn't blow apart her life on assumptions alone. All I knew was that I never liked the way he looked at her or the putrid yellow color of his aura, but thoughts and actions are two entirely different things. When I would ask her about him or about what was happening, or even about what had happened in her past, she would just change the subject. Sometimes she wouldn't say anything at all. The first time we were alone together, she looked at me as if I was the one who wanted something from her. I had no idea what she had gone through or what she was going through. All I knew was that she was damaged, hurting, and desperately needed someone in her life that she could trust and depend on. So that when she was ready, she felt safe enough to confide in me. For three years, she had me convinced that despite how it looked, nothing was happening. She used to say, 'Everything I've been through, it's worth it. Because I get to talk to the one, I love, more than anything in this world, and one day, I'm going to be with him. Then none of this is even going to matter.' And then she told me Tim and Oxana were getting another foster, a twelve-year-old, girl at the end the month." Cole pulled his lips back into his mouth, as he closed his eyes and scrunched his brow, his hands once more clenching into fists. "She only told me the truth because she wanted to know how to force him into keeping his end of the deal. She confirmed all my suspicions about what Tim was and what he had been doing. She swore up and down that she understood the part she played in all of it. She had convinced herself that it was all worth it, and she begged me not to tell anyone. I told her that she could trust me. That as long she swore that she had consented to it all, I wouldn't say anything as long as that bastard stayed away from the new kid. I lied."

Tau couldn't understand why things had unfolded the way they had. He thought back to all of the conversations he had shared with her, all of the times he watched her through the green, and through it all, she had never told him about Cole. She never spoke about the things he had done for her, the time they had spent together or the opportunities she could have had because of him. Cole had made it sound as if they were really close, but that left him wondering, "What did you do?"

Cole took a few shaky breaths, and then smiled as he looked over at Quayleigh who was still fast asleep in her bed, but Tau could clearly see a heavy sadness in his eyes.

"I…" he swallowed and tried again. "I was the one who called Oxana that night. I was the one who told her to go home early. I knew what she was going to find that night, because I had tried to call Tim, and he hadn't answered his phone. I knew Quays' reason for doing what she did, but no boy was worth that. She just couldn't see it. I had hoped that the authorities would have let me take her in; that because of her age, she'd have a say or at least she would reach out to me, but nothing went as I had hoped. No one would tell me where she was because I wasn't family, and because of what she'd gone through, they refused to allow me to even speak to her. The next time I heard anything the police were at my door with a warrant to search my home because she'd gone missing, and they thought that maybe she'd come to me, and I was hiding her. I tried to find her after that. I'd drive around the city for hours hoping to spot her. I called the police station every Friday morning for three months trying to get them to talk to me, and when they finally did, it was to tell me that they weren't even trying to find her. They called her a runaway and said there was nothing they could do. If she hadn't reached out to me, it probably be because she didn't want nothing to do with me. Not that I could blame her; I had destroyed her life. But she wasn't happy or safe. She was coping and surviving but she deserved the right to live and thrive; to know that there was better out there.

"I waited for her to reach out. I hoped she would show up, that she would come to me and let me explain why I did it. Or at the very least yell and scream and hate me to my face, but she never did. For more than a year I didn't hear from her. I received a few silent phone calls, every now and again, and I'd tell whoever was on the other end of that line that I was sorry, and I would help them if they would just let me, but the line would always go dead, and she would never show up.

"Then one day, she just come walking through the door like nothing happened. She placed her order, bought a candle, and spoke to me like I was just some old friend she hadn't seen in a few days." Tears began to creep into the corners of Cole's eyes as he spoke. "She acted like she was just another customer. When I reached out, she stopped me and shook her head. All those years and she wanted to act like they'd never happened. After what I had done, who was I to refuse her. My heart never hurt as much as it did that day," he said as he wiped the tears from his eyes and cleared his throat. "My biggest fear though, was that she'd turn around and leave and I'd never see her again. That she'd never come back to get her order and it would just sit on my counter waiting for her like I had. I can still remember feeling like she had just come in to let me know that she was okay, that despite what I had done, she had made it through, but of this I was certain; there was no forgiveness for me. No apology, no amount of begging was going to be enough to get back the relationship I had destroyed. I took her hard-earned trust, and I threw it away. And this was the price I had to pay to see her standing there with a genuine smile on her face. I don't deny I deserved to be treated as I was, but to see her like that, all the heartache, the worry, the long nights of wondering if I had done the right thing, and knowing I had done it the wrong way, it was all suddenly worth it. That be something I never deny."

"You miss it though, the way you were before with her?"

"I do. She was a bright light, bobbing up and down the aisles of the shop, and she was brilliant at her studies. The time we spent together was wonderful, and Tim and that trial, it stole so much away from her. It took the last remaining bit of her light, the tiny sliver she had managed to cling to; snuffed it out and threw it away. But that day, standing there in my shop, I finally saw her for the woman she had become. All grown up, through the harshness of the adults around her.

"If she knows it was me who set all of that in motion, she's never said. We've never spoken about it. Not a single word. I live each day wondering if she knows and too afraid to confess in case she doesn't. I'm simply grateful that she let me be a part of her life again; that I still get to see her and talk to her, knowing that she could have very well walked out of my store and never returned. I supposed I would have been alright with that too; believing that she'd gone off with that boy she sacrificed so much for. But even though this isn't as it once was, it's better than not truly knowing. At least this way, I know she's come to trust me again, and that is worth more to me than anything. And if she does know that it was me, I can only hope that she let me back into her life because she understands why I did what I did."

"Will you ever tell her?"

"No, Tau. This truth be mine to take to my grave. The only way I'll ever tell her is if she decides she wants to speak about it. But something tells me that will never happen. Somethings just, well, they just be better off left alone," Cole stated with a soft chuckle as he stood up. "Look at me rambling on like an old man. I'm going to grab my stuff and leave her to you."

"Thank you, Cole," Tau remarked as he looked up at him. "I think I understand this much better now. Let me help you carry your things to your car."

"That would be appreciated."

Grabbing the folded sheet, Cole carried it to the kitchen and set it into one of the boxes.

"I'll be back in a few minutes Uru," Tau told him as he picked up the second box and followed Cole to the door.

"It was interesting meeting you, Uroxuz," Cole added as he slid on his shoes.

"Likewise, pretty fruit. I thank you for sharing your story. I quite enjoyed the scent of your truth."

After having helped carry the boxes to Cole's car, Tau bid him goodnight and returned to the apartment, where he found Uroxuz now curled up on the couch.

"That one was unusual," Uroxuz said as Tau locked the door.

"Why did you show yourself to him?"

"I didn't. He saw me thanks to that ritual he was casting. I did not know such a thing was possible. Even as he forced his energy through her, the connection from her back to him was superficial, maintained along the threads. And no energy, that I could see, escaped passed her eye back to him, thus I do not know how it happened."

"Nevertheless, it did. You need to be more careful Uru. I'm beginning to worry that our actions maybe causing too many problems for Quayleigh. It hurt to see her go through this tonight."

"Yes. It was incredibly unnecessary. At your bidding I would ensure her safety."

"Then do it. Uroxuz, I want you to protect her as you would me."

"It will be an honor to serve," Uroxuz stated as Tau stripped down and climbed in behind Quayleigh. "I'll go and keep guard."

"No need. Sleep there," Tau whispered towards him, Quayleigh shifting slightly as he wrapped his arm around her.

"Is Cole gone?"

"Yeah. He said goodnight."

"That was nice of him."

"It was. Do you mind if Uru sleeps on the couch?"

"Not at all. This is his home now too. Goodnight Uru," she muttered, still mostly asleep.

"Rest well, giver of scritches."

She giggled lightly to her new title as she grabbed Tau's hand and pulled it up to her lips kissing it softly while shimmying back against him. "Good night, love."

"Goodnight, my Quayleigh."