Chapter 10

Shin arrived in Berlin at night. He was sent by the SS to an important and imposing family hotel, where he received a beautiful suite, with a huge double bed and wooden furniture. It was brown in its entirety - both the curtains and the furniture had this color.

He didn't care and when he was finally alone, he was able to breathe for the first time. Hiroshi and Takako had been sent to another, simpler hotel, but Shin insisted on demanding an excellent room for Jiro.

He told himself it was just a thank you.

Since the damn morning, he's been by your side. His light and brief touch, at various times, had prevented him from exploding in front of those cruel and cowardly men. It was Sergeant Saito who kept him cool and cool, even though a repudiation bomb exploded inside him.

They hadn't talked much. Shin feared to reveal his emotions if he spoke, so they remained silent, even when they said goodbye briefly in the hotel lobby. Then, as soon as he showered, the Japanese man went to the other's room, seeking dialogue.

"We need to get out of here now," Shin said, as soon as Jiro opened the door.

He marched into the room, without waiting for an invitation. Saito locked the door behind him, looking quickly down the hall.

"My uncle doesn't know what's going on, " he explained. " I need to go back to Tokyo and let him know."

Saito looked down.

"Sakamoto-san..."

"Call me Shin," he asked. "I want you to board with me. I need to be in Tokyo yet ..."

Shin was interrupted by two white fingers that were held against his soft lips. With his eyes fixed on Jiro, he finally noticed the dejected state of the other.

"We are in a war of good against evil," Saito said. " And we are the bad guys."

Shin pulled his white fingers away.

" What you mean?"

" I thought you knew when you went to Sobibor. I was surprised when I noticed his astonishment."

" Of course I didn't know! " Shin exclaimed. " How could I imagine that something like this would be accomplished by our allies?"

" Only our allies? We've done worse than that in China since 37, Shin-san. You just hadn't been informed."

Shin's eyes widened. The air in his lungs seemed to disappear and he felt the shock take him completely. The image of Kenzo, the man he killed for saying the same thing that Jiro now declared, took over his mind. He could see his sincere gaze, and the pride he seemed to demonstrate as he knelt before him, ready to receive his shot in the forehead.

A hysterical cry formed in his throat, but before expelling him in pain, Saito took a cross iron and pressed it against his face. Shin pressed the fabric to his lips, feeling the weeping mixed with the deep hatred, bewildering him.

He fell to the ground, even before he realized it. Beside him, Saito held him in his arms, as if his pity was enough to calm so much guilt. They had never seen each other before that day, but there was something that connected them deeply. Shin knew that Jiro managed to soften the remorse that was about to drive him crazy.

"Tell me everything," he asked when the screaming ended. "Tell me everything you know."

***

"You've been coming every night for three months, Ryo. And every night I tell you that you are not welcome. Why do you keep coming? Why are you hoping that my answer tonight will be different from the answer yesterday?"

Ryo looked at Mamoru. His shoulders low, in total surrender. Three months had passed since his morning meetings with Shiromiya ended. Since then, he had done everything to break down his friend's barriers, but it was in vain.

"This is crossing the line, Aiko. I just want to come in and have a drink."

"There are many houses like Ai in this neighborhood, Ryo. Choose one of them and have fun."

Ryo looked at him in disbelief. It was hard to believe that Mamoru could be so steadfast in his decisions. In the past, countless times, he has overlooked his mistakes. Now, he was adamant.

"Shin didn't beat him " Mamoru seemed to read his thoughts. "Shin just wanted revenge and, when he had it, dropped it. Not you. It hit him until he almost killed him."

Ryo bit his lower lip.

" Sakamoto commented that he had slept with the boy."

" Raped, that would be the most correct word."

" Even so you forgave him."

" Shin has many defects, I am aware of that. And yes, he was wrong, and I forgave him. The reasons that made me disclose only concern me. I have never given you satisfaction in my actions and I will not start now."

Aiko turned away, ready to enter Ai again. In an hour, the establishment would be open and he had not yet bathed and dressed to receive customers.

" Mamoru " Ryo took his arm. " Two minutes is all I ask. I brought him a present."

Aiko watched him closely while the merchant opened his coat to show him a book. He hesitated, weighing the powders and cons before giving his authorization. Despite knowing that the treatment would make Shiro happy, he feared the consequences that these reckless and regular visits might have on his fragile and broken heart.

" Okay, two minutes. "

***

" Nana " Shiromiya called the old woman.

The woman turned to the young man and saw him standing, looking at her seriously.

" What do you want, brat? I have to finish making the food!" She replied, turning the body over to the stone oven.

Shiro was silent for a few seconds, looking for the best words.

" Nana, have you ever loved?"

The old woman was startled and turned to him again.

" Not in the sense that you and I love Aiko-san, but love as Heathcliff loved Catherine."

" Heath what?"

"Heathcliff," he stammered. " Like those couples in the stories you tell me " exemplified.

Nana wiped her hands on her apron. Her eyes didn't look the least bit animated.

" Why are you asking that? You are crazy to give that ass, aren't you?"

" No, Nana-baba. I swear not!"

" So why do you want to know?"

" Just because I wanted to know how someone can love another person so much that he doesn't see anything else."

"Ah," the woman shrugged. " What is not lacking in this world are idiots. Don't you see Mamoru? He's a fool!"

Deep down, Shiromiya agreed.

"Nana, what's Ryo-san's name?" He asked suddenly, almost causing the woman to drop pottery in her hands.

She glared at him.

"Why the hell do you want to know? " She raised his hand, threatening. " I'll give you an itch if you dare start liking that one! Do you want to suffer? Do you want to spend the rest of your life being trampled like Mamoru? Shame on your face!"

" It is not that " defended itself. " I just talked to Ryo-san every day for more than a month and I realized that I never asked his name."

Her disbelieving look bothered him. But, before Nana replied, Aiko appeared. The courtier motioned for Shiromiya to follow him. However, before going, the boy hugged Nana and kissed her on the cheek. An apology for worrying her.

***

"I was just twenty when I finished training in the imperial army," he said. "I was young and idealistic, and he was anxious to see the world, to take our flag to other peoples, to fight for justice. Deep down, I felt like a character in any romantic book, seeking honor and prestige."

Shin lit his cigarette. He was sitting on the floor, next to Jiro. Both, propped up on the bed, had a glass of beer in hand. Sakamoto did not look at his new friend when he saw him start the narrative. But he interrupted him as soon as Jiro paused.

"Tell me about how you learned German."

" I already explained that."

Shin laughed, mocking.

"I walked a lot throughout Japan, Sergeant Saito, and I never, at any time, saw a German priest," he poked. "Tell the truth."

Jiro couldn't resist and laughed. Shin handed him the cigarette and Jiro took a drag before proceeding.

"I had a woman, a lover, who taught me"

"You meant to say that you had a 'man'," he corrected.

Jiro looked at him.

" As you know?

" There are things that the way of gesturing and the way of walking denounce. Even those who keep themselves secret, I can discover their inclinations just by watching them."

" And it bothers you?"

Jiro returned the cigarette. As he took it, Shin held his fingers, entering his eyes. The chemistry was instantaneous.

"Talk about your lover," he demanded.

Saito drank. Then he smiled, looking like the memories were good.

" My family has a small property, as I told you before. My parents grow rice, potatoes, and other foods. I had a simple life until I reached my adolescence " he murmured. After, he spoke in a normal voice. " I was sixteen when an army group camped near my home. They were in training and went to ask my father to use some mountains that were on our property."

"They asked?" Shin raised his eyebrows. Usually, the imperial army prevailed.

"Yes. Only later, I realized that it was just a captain's strategy to approach me. I believe he saw me coming from school."

" Captain? What is the name?"

" Oguri-san. Knows?"

Shin denied it.

" Well, he's a very handsome man. Thirty-something, I believe. Anyway, he started coming almost every day, he talked to me a lot, he started to praise me, those things that any expert does to get the favors of an idiot. " Jiro laughed. " I'm the idiot, in case you haven't noticed."

Shin finished the cigarette and squeezed it in an ashtray on the floor. Before even lighting another one, Saito went on.

" One day, he hinted that he would spend the afternoon alone in a remote barn. I got the message and went to him. " Jiro fell silent for a few minutes. " I don't regret it, it was the best time of my life. In the first week, we only had sex. The world seemed to stop existing, it taught me everything, it made me discover how to feel pleasure, it made me discover a man. Then, when the fire had calmed down a little, he started teaching me about life, about literature, theater, and, finally, he taught me, German. Oguri had spent a few years in Germany in the thirties. I knew how to speak fluently and I learned in difficulty. " He smiled. " These were truly wonderful months."

" Why aren't you together?"

" Soon after, Oguri was called back to Tokyo. I went crazy, I didn't want to stay away from him, so I decided to join the army. I did all the steps and became a good soldier. One day, I heard that he was in my regiment. I was nineteen years old. It was a party day, celebrating something I don't remember. I got all dressed up, wore my best uniform, and went to him. When he saw me, he hugged me and said that I was happy about my destiny. Then he turned his back on me and went back to his wife ...

Jiro went back to drinking.

" Son of a bitch ... " Shin murmured.

" Okay, I should know. Most men are like that. But, I discovered that I would never marry a woman. I refuse to deceive someone simply to hide what I am."

Shin thought the same way.

" And then?"

" It didn't take a week and I received a letter informing me that I was being transferred to Unit 731. I was happy, it was a scientific field, without war. Many medical students went there to complement their studies and I imagined that I would have a good time of peace."

Jiro finished his beer and refilled his glass. There was a long silence between them. On the street, cars were making a loud noise, and people's voices were quite loud, even though it was already dark. That city hardly resembled calm Tokyo.

" I should have known I was getting into hell. The day I arrived, the doctor in charge of the base took a live cat and threw it in the middle of hundreds of hungry mice. I was on duty and didn't want to show a reaction, but I can still hear the animal's agonized screams as it was devoured."

A cat?

Shin's eyes filled with tears. Of all the animals in the world, was your favorite species the first to suffer from human evil?

"Shiro Ishi[30] is the name that still causes me nightmares."

"I've heard of him."

In the hallways of the palace, they claimed that Shiro was crazy. Why then did they hand over a whole base?

"Ishi calls his guinea pigs. And it had everything: children, the elderly, men, and women. He did not differentiate between human and animal life, everything must serve the purpose of science. He said it was the advance, he said that the world, one day, would thank him for everything. For a year, I saw him do hundreds of experiences that I will never forget. I carried out his orders without question, it was my duty " he laughed, devastated. " I put men trapped upside down and wrote down the time it took them to die from suffocation. I helped to hold the vivisection instruments several times, watching it open alive and without anesthesia."

Saito's voice gasped and Shin pulled him in, hugging him.

" You have no idea what's going on in Unit 731, Shin ... Even if I say one day everything I saw, without visualizing the corpses, you could never understand the amount of horror."

Sakamoto's fingers slid through his black, slightly curly hair. Their eyes met, and Shin was moved by the pain there.

"One day, he asked me to choose a girl of, at the most, three years old. There were many, trucks full of Chinese, and Koreans arrived every day. But I knew that I would be choosing someone to die, and I felt panicked. I went to the patio and watched. I noticed the fear in everyone there when I faced myself. So, I walked out into the open and stopped in front of the first girl I saw. Her mother had her in her arms, and I pulled her out. I condemned my soul forever at that moment".

Jiro took another sip. Beer, it seemed, was an indispensable fuel to remember everything.

" I handed it over to a class of students and other members of the base. I saw some strong and large soldiers entering the room and I stepped aside. I wondered what kinds of experiments I would do on that fragile child, but nothing prepared me or to see him being tied to a chair and his face being strapped. Then one of the big guys punched her ...

His voice was gone for a few moments.

"The experiment was to calculate what force should be used to break a child's skull ."

Shin went back to smoking. His hands were shaking so badly he could barely bring the cigarette to his mouth.

"That day, when I left the experiment room, I didn't go to my quarters. I headed towards the laboratory and scanned it until I found a cyanide capsule. As soon as I found it, I headed towards my room. I didn't want to die putting a bullet in the head, because I thought that would be a shame for my poor grandmother.

"What stopped you?"

"Before arriving at my room, my superior crossed me down the hall. He asked me if it was true that I knew German. I confirmed it, and then he ordered me to pack up my things because I was leaving that night for Germany to be an interpreter for some members of the army.

One more sip.

"I left one hell for another. What you saw today was one of the smallest concentration camps that Germany has. As bad as I seem to say this, Sobibor is a paradise near Auschwitz."

"Auschwitz?"

" It is a network of concentration camps, located close to each other. There is Auschwitz ONE, TWO and THREE. Auschwitz, by the way, has its own Shiro Ishi. A doctor named Josef Mengele." Saito laughed, getting Shin's attention. "I believe that monsters disguised as scientists and doctors have always existed, don't they? I didn't see much about Mengele, but the little I saw already showed me that he's a lunatic."

Shin held up a hand, hiding his face with it. It was destroyed, devastated. Everything he spent his life believing in was no more. He felt Jiro's fingers on his shoulder. Then, slowly, Saito hugged him, bringing him to himself. For a few moments, they were embraced in silence. Then they faced each other. Within seconds, Jiro brought his face closer.

However, at the last moment, Shin turned away.

" Sorry ... " Jiro murmured when he realized the other's silence.

"Don't get me wrong, Jiro," Shin said. " I never wanted to be comforted by anyone so much. I think you would be the only medicine that could calm me down now. But..."

"But?"

"I don't kiss on the mouth."

Saito couldn't resist and laughed. It would be comical if it weren't so cute.

"You love someone," he said, finding the sheepish look cute.

"He's not a lover," Shin explained. " Is my best friend."

Returning to the embrace, Jiro smiled.

" I spoke of my feelings, now speak you. Tell me everything about him."

Shin smiled. It was the first time he would do that. Until then, he had never confessed his feelings for Mamoru to anyone, not even himself.

"We are childhood friends. In fact, against the whole family, I brought that friendship into adulthood ."

" Against the family?

" Mamoru owns a brothel in Tokyo. Have you heard of "Ai"?"

"The House of Love," Jiro whispered. " They say it is the most expensive and disputed place in the city. But, having only women working, I was never interested in going there."

"The Ai house is more than a whorehouse. I'll take you there when we get back, "he promised. " The food and drink are wonderful. And the conversation, then ... It's a welcoming place, with good music and smart people. Very well attended."

Jiro nodded.

"Tell me about Mamoru," he insisted. " What's he like?

For a few moments, Shin sought the image of the courtier in his mind.

"He looks like an angel. Aiko is kind, even when angry. The tone of his voice is neutral, he hardly changes. He likes children, animals. He is a fair person, known for treating his prostitutes with deference and courtesy."

" And physically?"

" Ah, he's beautiful! " Shin smiled. "His hair is brown, long, almost reaching his waist. He's skinny, but not that kind of skinny without meat. Mamoru has a delicious ass and soft thighs ..."

" And he loves you?"

" I know he love."

" Then why aren't they lovers?"

"I don't want to lose his feelings," Shin explained. " If we went to bed, you would understand. I suck at making love. I lose control, I am too fast and I hardly pay attention to what the other is feeling."

Saito was amazed at the sincerity. No other man had ever confessed this to him. He did not resist and provoked.

"Now you will have to prove your words to me, Shin."

In seconds he gets to his feet. He took off his shirt and pants, standing naked before the member of the royal family. He noticed Sakamoto's bright eyes on him and smiled. It was true that there was no love there, but he was not looking for that feeling. He was young and all he wanted to do was live. Even because I didn't know how much I would still have in the face of the horror that war was becoming.

When Shin got up and advanced under him, he knew he would have everything that night.

***

"Good night, Shiro" Ryo smiled, rising from his chair and advancing to the other.

His eyes sparkled when he saw him, feeling suddenly happy and joyful, his body full of a powerful and unknown sensation.

"I missed you a lot, Shiro," he admitted. "Did you feel mine?"

"No."

The latent sincerity of the other made him smile even more. Kazue Shiromiya, the prostitute who dressed as a woman at Ai, was not in the habit of lying or masking words. He did not praise according to the wishes of others. Contrary to what Ryo imagined, it did him good.

"I'll stay here" Mamoru showed a bench in the corner. "And you can deliver your gift to him. I will not interfere."

It wouldn't interfere, but it wouldn't leave them alone either, realized Ryo. Still, he was glad for the opportunity and pulled Shiro over to the table they both used for morning teas.

"I brought you a gift," Ryo said, opening his coat.

He held out a thick black covered book before Shiromiya. Kazue looked at the book with interest.

"My favorite book, Shiro. It is the story of Rosa and Cornélius."

" A love story? " The boy's interest seemed even more acute.

" Yes, but it is also a story of political conspiracy and adventure."

" And what's the name?"

Ryo was surprised by the question since the title was written on the cover.

" The Black Tulip. "

Shiro pulled out the book and flipped through the pages.

" Thank you very much, Ryo-san. I will keep it with all my heart."

At that moment Ryo saw reflecting gratitude that greatly amazed him. It was as if Shiromiya had the most expensive treasure in her fingers. He had never seen it, even in women who received expensive jewelry after sex.

" When you read it, tell me what you think."

Shiromiya's eyes looked surprised for a few moments. Then he opened his mouth, innocent.

" I can not read.

Ryo was amazed. He knew that some low-income people could not read, but even Tadao had attended school and was literate. Then, a poignant contempt touched him, making him come to himself.

He was a powerful merchant, a learned, wealthy man, owner of a fishing fleet, and several canned sardine factories, and was he there looking for the friendship of a nobody?

Rising, he dodged Shiro and went to Aiko.

"I'll come at night. Please ask Rika to wait for me."

Mamoru did not deny the words. Rika was in great need of money, it looked like her mother had been sick. So he accepted that interest.

"Ryo-san" Shiro called him as soon as he realized he was getting ready to leave. "Again, thank you for the gift."

"Kind of useless since you're illiterate, aren't you? " Ryo replied coldly.

Without further ado, he left. As soon as his figure disappeared, Shiromiya turned to Aiko.

"Ryo-san are you angry about something?"

Realizing that the other had not identified the prejudice in his tone of voice, Mamoru denied it. Shiromiya didn't need that pain anymore.

That night, Ryo did not appear.

***

As soon as Shin Sakamoto fell on Jiro's naked body, the sergeant knew that the other had not lied about his way of making love. In fact, "making love" was an understatement to get into your body quickly at times, moan and ejaculate. Ready. In two minutes, maybe even less, Shin had finished what he had proposed.

"When you said it was bad in bed, I thought you were charming" Jiro laughed. "But you are the worst lover I ever had in my arms. "

Shin was not offended.

"Do you understand now why I run away from Aiko's feelings?"

Jiro nodded.

"You need to learn to behave with a lover, Shin. Otherwise, ahead of time, your life with Mamoru Aiko will not last long."

"I do not know what to do."

Saito smiled, stroking her hair in disarray.

"I'm going to teach you."

The soft, warm tone with which he said that caused the other to tingle. Shin stared at him, feeling the sexual organ stiffen again, ready for the attack.

"Kiss me, Shin-chan... " Saito asked, close.

"But ..."

"You will not be betraying the memory of your beloved Mamoru," he promised. " You'll just be learning what to do ..."

Still doubtful, Shin lowered his face. Feeling Jiro embrace him, he reached for the other's appetizing lips. Within seconds, his daring tongue caressed the other, and his entire body was filled with a powerful desire.

"Not yet, Shin," Jiro said. " First, caress me with your hands. Enjoy the moment."

When the manly fingers roamed his chest, gripping his firm thigh tightly, Saito groaned.

"You're doing great, Shin," he praised, his voice almost breaking with pleasure. " Now, slide your mouth over the places where your hand went ...

Obediently, Shin seemed a good student applied to his master's teachings. Jiro threw his head back, moaning loudly when his soft lips played with her nipples and then sought her belly and thigh. However, soon after, Shin went inside him again. Jiro groaned when he felt the hard meat, but he was not irritated by Sakoto's longing. He just told himself to be patient.

"Shin, go in slowly until you feel a protrusion ..."

The first time, although slow, Shin felt nothing. But the second time he got into Jiro, he could feel a slight lump.

" I think I found it," he groaned.

Jiro would laugh if he weren't dying in pleasure.

"Yes, you did," he confirmed. " Now get strong there ..."

Fulfilling what had been ordered, Shin began to stock hard. The air heated up, the moans rose in level, and in a second they were both in an animalistic, sickly, and strong rhythm.

The climax was quick. Jiro and Shin reached orgasm at about the same time. As soon as the big man fell on him, Jiro hugged him affectionately. He realized at that moment that teaching Sakamoto the art of eroticism would be a delight that would do him good.