Chapter 29

Masami Aiko believed her whole life in the ancient oriental legend of the red line of love. She trusted her eyes, or her soul, to have seen her linked to Cun Xi, and died by reassuring herself that she had made the right choice.

Years later, sitting on a bench in his room, opposite the other occupant - the Emperor's dear protégé - her son wondered if the mother had been right. Rationally, in exchange for a few days of happiness, she ruined her own life, confined herself to a hope that never came true, and condemned her son to a future of fear and apprehension.

"I love my mother, but she didn't even blink to give herself up to despair and hopelessness, leaving me alone, without any other living relative whom I could trust " ended narrative to quiet Shin, who had heard every word without expressing any words. comment. " I got attached to Nana because of that. She was the one who took care of me when I got sick, or who taught me to be a man. Nana was my real mother, and that's why I love her so much."

There was a desperate silence after that. Shin, sitting on the futon, rested his arms on his knees. The thumbs came together in a forward circle. He looked thoughtful, still absorbing every word, every sentence said. It did n't seem real, it shouldn't be real. He remembered once hearing a random comment about Aiko being a lieutenant's bastard, which is why the geisha Masami had given him the name Mamoru. They also commented that when she discovered the fact, the lieutenant's wife - who could not have children - had killed herself. At that moment, Shin realized how misleading bad languages ​​were, that even coherent gossip could not do.

"When did you know its origin? " was his first sentence in the new year that started.

It was midnight and forty minutes before the first of January 1944. He remembered that during the afternoon he had done his chores, greeted the family, preparing to go to his lover. He had sworn to himself the new year that was beginning would be different. That he would make Aiko happy, that he would give his love everything he could. However, his feeling faded at the confession.

"I always knew."

He realized that Mamoru was being sincere in his response. Perhaps, this had been the first time that the other had been frank with him.

"So, you seduced me and accepted me as a lover, knowing that you were just a Chinese?"

"I love you, Shin," he tried to defend himself, ignoring the rude tone. " I just wanted to be close to you, demonstrate every day how much I adore you ..."

Sakamoto rose from the futon and started walking towards the door. Mamoru intercepted him before reaching for her.

"You know how frank I was about my feelings," the young courtier faced him. " I love you more than anything, I love you above myself and would do anything to be with you. I would submit to anything, I would destroy myself if I had to, so ... Shin, don't go away leaving me in this agony."

Shin laughed, cruel.

"You are definitely like your mother. The bitch slept with a Chinese man, regardless of her honor. A bitch who put a foreign bastard on the land of the sun goddess. You, your mother, your uncle ... Everyone who has any connection with you disgusts me."

Astonished, Aiko was unable to move.

"Get out of the way." His tone was low, though angry. "I would never have anything to do with a dirty Chinese man," he said cruelly. " You disgust me, revolt me ​​..."

Fighting tears, but unable to express a reply, Mamoru dodged the door and allowed the other to get out.

***

" Shiro, how did you do kadomatsu[40] so beautiful?

The boy blushed and smiled at Saito Jiro. The sergeant was, for the first time since they met, without his uniform. Wearing a white kimono with black flowers, he looked even more handsome, so at ease. Despite the winter, the evening was pleasant and dinner had been set on a table in the garden. He was happy for the presence, because, if Jiro wasn't there, he would spend that New Year's just beside the old sleepy Nana, who was already closing her eyes.

Ryo Satoshi had appeared in the afternoon. He commented about going to an important event with some businessmen in the fishing industry, and then he said nothing more. So he didn't ask if he would come to Ai. They simply talked about banalities and then said goodbye without any desire for good news or an empty promise.

"Midori taught me before she left," he clarified.

" Oh! I just realized that the girls are not here. Do they spend the holidays with families?"

" Yes, and they take money to their parents and siblings too."

" Good girls, for sure."

Shiro nodded.

"Jiro-kun, thank you very much for being here," he said suddenly.

" I thank you for the company " the other smiled. " Without you, what would be? Those two " referred to Aiko and Shin " haven't even left the bedroom since the year began."

As if the gods decided to disagree with his placement, Mamoru's door opened. Both noticed Shin Sakamoto quickly descending the stairs. It seemed to be heading towards the gate, but before reaching it, Mamoru emerged from the shadows and took his arm.

"Please don't go," he begged, loud enough for Shiro and Jiro to hear.

They seemed to have fought and Saito almost laughed at the ridicule. But the laugh that was not made became astonishment when he see the big man pushing hard on the other, throwing him on the floor.

It was violence the sergeant never imagined seeing from Shin against the one he said he loved more than anything. Beside him, Shiromiya left his post and ran towards the courtier. Nana seemed to wake up and stood, apprehensive. Only then did Saito move, feeling his legs walk the path that separated him from the pair. As he approached, he noticed Shiro beside Aiko, as if ready to protect him, and Shin standing in front of the two, possessed.

"Now, what is this, Sakamoto? " he joked, trying to calm that storm. " Since when do you act like that?"

"Since I found out that the owner of Ai is nothing but a filthy Chinese man who deserves death," he said in an angry tone and, turning on his back, left the gates, leaving everyone in shock.

Jiro, for a few moments, did not seem to believe what he had heard, but then he turned to his friend, who was staring at him with eyes covered with tears.

" Is it true? " he asked, still amazed.

Mamoru just nodded, lacking the courage to answer. Then Nana reached them and pulled him off the floor.

" If you run away now, maybe you can catch a train without being noticed ..."

Aiko looked stricken, his eyes uneasy. He could barely speak.

"In fifteen minutes, maybe less," Jiro interrupted, "the whole Kempeitai in the country will be looking for him."

The words cut the chain that kept Nana sane. Covering her mouth with her hands, she was unable to cover a dry scream that escaped from her lips. Beside her, Shiro clung tightly to Mamoru, as if he could shelter him from everything that came. But, Aiko reacted surprisingly. He didn't move, he didn't speak, he seemed calm and cold. Perhaps he had been waiting for this for years.

Only when he finally opened his mouth, Saito understood why.

"Do what has to be done, Jiro," he said to the sergeant.

Saito didn't blink. He knew what concentration camps life was all about. That knowledge moved him to the holster that rested on a bench. He looked for weapon, and with the same firmness, returned to the two guys and the old woman. In seconds, he aimed the revolver at Aiko's head.

"There must be a way out," Shiromiya murmured, for the first time. "Perhaps it is possible to negotiate with Kempeitai."

"When the police arrive, either Mamoru will be beaten to death in the street, or they will send him to a labor camp. There, he will be tortured so much that he will ask Kami-sama that death finds him as soon as possible. Even if I describe everything I saw, I could never explain the extent of the horror that he will experience. Therefore, it is much safer to die quickly by my hands."

There were no goodbyes. Aiko closed his eyes, while Jiro slid his finger on the trigger. However, the sound of the gate being opened made him lower his weapon. Shin was coming back. And he is alone.

In a mixture of hope and apprehension, they noticed the man walking straight, crossing by them, and going to the kitchen. From there, he left a few seconds later, carrying a gallon of kerosene with him. Shortly after, he went to Aiko's room. He came back, spilling all the evidence that incriminated the courtier on the lawn.

When he spilled the flammable liquid on top of the papers and photos, Aiko understood his purpose. Even though he understood that this was his salvation, he disengaged himself from Shiromiya and ran towards Shin. When he reached it, he tried to take the platinum lighter that was ready to use.

Insane, Sakamoto slapped him, throwing him away. Even so, Mamoru started to stop him again, but Saito suddenly appeared and held him.

" My family ... My memories ..." the courtier murmured to the sergeant. " I won't remember my mother's face anymore, Jiro-kun ..."

Smoke soon invaded his nostrils. The fire, in that soaked material, did not take even a minute to destroy all life for which Mamoru was so fond. The sound of the geisha's son crying and the spark of fire was all that was heard for the next few minutes. When all that was left of the pile of papers was black and gray powder, Shin Sakamoto went to him.

"Consider yourself happy that I disrupted the evidence that incriminated you. No words will come out of my lips about that night, but know that from now on you died for me. I never intend to see your face again, and if you come to me, I will incriminate you with the police and send you to China. So forget about my existence, for I will do the same for you."

***

It was dawn when Nana returned to Mamoru's room. The old woman was carrying a tray with three cups of tea. Shiro and Jiro accepted the favor with low greetings. Aiko, however, turned away from the green drink, rejecting it.

The old woman then sat on the futon next to his. She pulled him onto her lap and stroked his face, gently.

" I should have set those photos and letters on fire as soon as Masami died " she say. " But I had promised your mother's irresponsible that I would give everything to you ..."

" My mom just tried ..."

" Your mother was an idiot! " Nana cut him off, disgusted. " With that face of a good girl, it made me put yours own son's life at risk. What if Shin Sakamoto hadn't been so benevolent?"

Aiko closed his eyes, taking a deep breath.

"I think we should go," Nana said seriously. " A house far from Tokyo. Inside, where no one knows us."

Saito nodded, seeming to agree with the woman. Shiro remained silent, awaiting the decision.

"I'm not leaving," Mamoru said, firmly.

"Since that damn war started, Ai is no longer profitable as it used to be. You continue to keep your food and drink top-notch, but it are getting more and more expensive. Before the war, a month of work paid for all the girls, food, and drinks and you could still keep some in the bank, along with the little that your uncle left you. Now, the entire month of work does not pay all bills. I know that you've been messing with the money saved to give the girls to travel. We will go bankrupt in a short time, Mamoru."

"I'm not leaving," he persevered.

"There's nothing else for you in Tokyo," she insisted.

" What if Shin changes his mind? " He stood up, facing the woman. " He may regret what he said and come back to see me ..."

"He may regret not giving you to Kempeitai," she scolded.

" I won't give up on his love " Aiko was firm. " I know he won't forget me just for one detail."

" Detail?" Nana's eyes widened. "You are a stubborn and inconsequential fool, just like your mother!"

After that, the woman got up and left the room, snorting.

"Nana is right, Aiko," Jiro said, after being alone with Shiro. " Shin won't go back. Be grateful that he changed after seeing Nazism with his own eyes. I am sure that, otherwise, Sakamoto would not hesitate to call Kempeitai."

Mamoru lowered his face, ashamed.

"We can be happy in the countryside, Aiko-san" Shiro spoke for the first time since Shin was gone. "A new life away from everyone ..."

" I will not leave..."

" But ..."

" Stop! " shouted. " Shin won't forget me. He'll be back, and it will be soon. Let's be together because this is how it is supposed to be."

" How did your mother think, in the Akai Ito legend? " Jiro nudged.

Nana had told him and Shiro the whole story after Mamoru fell asleep amid a muffled cry during the night.

"Your mother spent her whole life waiting for something that didn't happen. Didn't you learn anything from her, Mamoru?"

The courtier pouted in disgust and then lay down on his back to his friends. Jiro and Shiromiya looked at each other, not knowing how to react to so much prank.

"Can you understand the importance of what happened, Aiko? " Jiro asked. " You could be dead right now!"

"I know that," the other replied. "God! Do you think I ignore my destiny? But in me there is only Shin, I can only think of him, live for him, nothing else matters to me if he is not with me."

Revolted, Saito stood up.

"Nana is right, you are just an idiot! Countless people are dying right now, being victims of this damn war. You had the gift of Kami-sama to be spared and, instead of being grateful for it, you withdraw into a love that has passed."

Mamoru did not open his mouth to reply. What could he say? With nothing else to do, Saito decided to leave. He left without saying goodbye, closing the bad New Year's everyone had.

" Will you also be against me? " Aiko asked to Shiro the last one who stayed.

Shiromiya smiled.

" Even if I loved someone with the intensity that you love Shin-san, I would never stay in a place that could put my safety at risk. Aiko-san, I don't think it's smart to stay, but I'm with you in your choices, even if I don't agree with them.

Aiko smiled at Shiro.

"Staying here is keeping my hope," he explained. " If I leave, it is the definitive acceptance that I will no longer have Shin. And if I don't have it, what do I want to live for?"

There were many reasons to live. But, Shiromiya decided to be practical and not try to convince Mamoru of this. Unfortunately, it was only a matter of time before the courtier realized that his fairy tale had collapsed.

***

"Do you know what happened between Shin and Aiko?" Ryo asked the young man beside him.

Shiromiya looked at him nervously. They were in a family park east of Tokyo. It was a beautiful Sunday afternoon, and the businessman had shown up at Ai about an hour earlier to call the young man for a walk.

"Why?"

"Shin refuses to say his name, and when I questioned the reasons, he told me that Aiko had died. He also told me that he no longer wants to know anything about Mamoru."

Shiro lowered his face. Sitting on a wooden bench under a huge orange tree, he seemed to meditate on the words.

" I bet Aiko cheated on him with the sergeant " Ryo kicked.

" What? " Shiro almost laughed. " Why?"

" That guy doesn't fool me."

" Jiro-san is very handsome, but Aiko-san only has eyes for Sakamoto.

Ryo looked at him.

" Do you think he's cute?"

" Who wouldn't think Jiro was handsome?"

Ryo stood up, angry. He started walking towards the lake, and Shiromiya followed, running after him.

" Ryo-san? " he called when he noticed him getting away.

" Ry-chan! " corrected. " Didn't I tell you to call me that?

Shiro did not understand the reason for the other's closed countenance. However, he didn't have much time to think about Ryo's motives. Feeling his foot falter, he fell to the floor.

" What's it? " Ryo turned to him.

"I think I twisted my ankle, " he explained.

Suddenly, he found himself being lifted off the floor. He was so amazed that he couldn't even complain. Ryo kept him steady, safe. Shiromiya's heart filled with anticipation as the body entered a mixed state of warmth and affection.

Saw the black eyes fixed on his lips. Without thinking, he slid his tongue over his mouth, moistening his lips, which seemed to dry up over the intense gaze.

" You provoke me, Shiro. " Ryo murmured.

" Do not understand..."

" Yes, you understand " Ryo smiled. " But we will not discuss this now, we are in a public place. I will take you to the car."

The entire journey back to the brothel was done in silence. In the front seat, Tadao drove without realizing the pair behind him, holding hands.