New World

It's been a few days since I was reincarnated as a toilet. A few dark and miserable days might I add, days spent running from one strange allyway to another. If it wasn't bad enough that I am a toilet, I also appear to have been reincarnated in some gigantic metropolis that I've never seen before. It could have definitely been worse though, have I not been able to free myself from the bolts that held me down then I would have sat just as I sit now, alone. Except I would have been in that creepy apartment. Pretty sure someone was murdered there, probably a few years ago. Considering how dusty the place was and the police tape all over the front door, which I broke through screaming before plummiting down the stairs all the way to the ground floor and then rolling out of the back entrance.

Haven't met anyone so far, and I don't really think anyone would approve of a literal walking toilet. Even If I did want to talk to someone the layout of this city is so strange that I wouldn't be able to find anyone, I've yet to find any sort of populated road or pathway other than alleyways squeezed in between giant buildings that disapear into an endless fog around the 7th floor. Have I also mentioned thats its basically always nightime too?

Thankfully I've noticed that I don't seem to get hungry. Which is nice considering I haven't seen anything that a walking sentient toilet might eat. Whatever that may be. I don't want to think too hard about that to be honest. A mirror is what I really want, and maybe some light. So I can actually take a closer look at myself. I might want to look through some rubble, maybe try entering one the few buildings with doorways.

With something somewhat reminiscent of a goal, I stand up and start walking mindlessssly through the webs of this strange concrete jungle. On the positive side, I am utterly Jacked, well the human parts that is. So stamina is no issue to me. I finally arrive a building that has a door. Once again, the thing looks like it hasn't been touched since the first episode of Blade Craft Connected came out.

I muster up some courage and try the door handle, which suprisingly opens easily. Sure it sounded like a dying cat but it did open. The inside is just as dark as the alleyways but not so dark that I cannot see, looking inside I see a myriad of large crates and boxes all over the place and coming in closer I see that most of them are inscribed with some strange characters. As jacked as I may be I don't think I could open any of these boxes though, thankfully a few of them seemed open. Those are filled with many trinkets whose use I can only imagine, Strange metallic spheres, small envelopes with strange shapes on them, magazines with pages that never end. But, what caught my eye the most was a small transparent bag. Inside of it, a weakly glowing red crystal.

I still could not decode the markings on the bag, but there was a picture of a butler on it, and for some reason I felt like the design and presentation of the thing was very reminiscent of a tech gadget.

'Meh I might as well try opening it' I think to myself, opening up the package and holding the crystal made me realise its made out of glass. Suddenly a strange thick gas flows out and I am greeted by a strange floating panel. Once again everything is written in that strange script, but thankfully it seemed like standard technological ideas and procedures still applied (standard back in my old world) and a progress bar was winding up. Before long the progress bar finishes and I am greeted with a picture of a butler, with actual russian written this time!

Finally! something I can understand I rejoice.

Butler 5 Identiy Managment Artifact, Your language was detected as [Russian], is this correct?

'How did it know' I wondered when the device promptly replied with 'Version 7.2.9 Ideamatrix(TM) is currently activated as the main communication method'.

'I guess you're reading my thoughts?' I tried thinking again. Nothing happened.

'Yes I understand this language' I concentrated on thinking.

The entire screen was then replaced by a somehat complex array of panels listing different stats, a bit like like your character sheet in a video game. One of the panels was a picture of me, which was as expected a toilet with human arms and legs. Under it the species was stated as unknown.

'I guess I no longer need a mirror then' I thought.

Other than all the standard stats such as strength (which I took great pride in seeing was the highest) one stat confused me a bit.

'What does MANA stand for? Could it be that this world has magic?' I pondered. if it did, then it could change a lot of things, for instance I might be able to somehow turn myself back into a human (Cause I can't imagine that surgery will fix my lack of organs). Looking at the stat now, I signed, 'Its a big fat zero eh?' As i though I also noticed there was a "Rank" counter right next to it, which was at a 100.

'I guess the lower the rank the better then eh?' I thought to myself. For some reason the panel changed and gave me what I could only assume was a google search result for some guide thing.

'One of the best ways for beginners to gain mana and in turn level up thier rank would be to practice 90th gate meditation. Although this method might take time, It has been shown to be the most effective solution for raising idle MANA consistently ' was highlighted from a large article. Not exactly what I asked but I'm not complaining, at least now I know how to move forward. Plus I finally have a goal in my sad new life.

'How to do 90th gate meditation' I mentally think. The panel once again provides me a new highlighted article. 'To perform 90th gate meditation, the easiest of the gate meditations, simply try to remain as still as possible. This includes removing all thoughts and attempting to lower once blood flow and internal movements as much as possible. MANAGuru reccomends to meditate in a cold enviroment for best results'.

'Well I don't have any blood flow I think, Even the pulse in arm is usually very weak. Which I hardly understand considering I dont even have a heart but whatever' I sit down and "close" my eyes. Eliminating all thoughts, The last thing that enters my mind is.

'How am I even thinking without a brain?'.

And then full and total darkness.