Pretty lies

"Shit," I mutter under my breath to myself, looking at my surroundings for any chance of escape. That asshole did this on purpose. I don't know if I'm more annoyed at him, or the realization that my messy situation with my cheating ex-boyfriend has reached every ear at this academy. It did not even escape the notice of a stranger that seems to keep to himself and might literally be living in a cave.

Besides the classroom Javier just left from, there's nothing around me but an open courtyard. Not even another sculpture or a rock to hide behind. I idly wonder if I should stick my head in the dirt to hide, but decide to turn down that thought since I do have some pride left.

Muttering curses to myself, I turn back to Javier and square my shoulders ready for whatever crap he is about to launch my way. Some students pause in their walking, shamelessly waiting to watch the show unfold before them. My offensive strategy crumbles when I see a look of deep hurt and longing flash through his amber eyes, and he surprises me further by stopping in front of me and keeping a respectable distance between us.

"Layla," he breathes fervently, and if my senses were working properly, I might be able to taste the strong emotions pouring from him.

"Hi, Javier," I say sadly. I have fond memories of us together. We came from completely different backgrounds - I was my parent's only child, who they loved strongly and unconditionally, while Javier was their parent's youngest and fourth child who treated him like an obstacle to their freedom. Feeling as a burden to his family, he started working young, finding any odd job he could. In the United States, you can't legally work until you are 16, but Javier started working years before that and was paid in cash to keep it off the books.

He used the money to pay for his bus transportation and his food, since his mother often forgot to stock the fridge with anything other than alcohol. With anything he had leftover, he would slip the money into his mother's purse or his father's wallet, not wanting them to feel bad about him working to help them out at home. If they did, it would probably have only made him feel more like a burden.

He worked hard, and money continued to appear in their wallets but they never spoke about it. Finally when he was seventeen, he secured a job at a restaurant that paid well enough for him to be able to afford a new place. His boss gave him an advance so he could pay for the deposit on his apartment, and Javier worked overtime to pay it off as quickly as possible.

Out of necessity, he had to grow up quickly and become independent when he should have been enjoying his adolescent years. We started as friends first, often laughing together and growing closer until we started to quietly rely on each other, which caught us both by surprise. But we had built foundations of a relationship which I was confident in, or I was, until that eventful, recent night.

He had told me that he couldn't come to my parents' funeral because he had work, but I wonder if that wasn't true. Now, I can't help but wonder how many times he had misled me, while I had bought into his pretty lies with an ignorant smile on my face.

I have missed him, and it is clear to me now that he does genuinely misses me too. I am not sure how I feel about that, given that we are in this situation now because of his betrayal. I never thought I would be the type to look back at a relationship and feel conflicted about it. I had always thought that once it's over, it should be over. A clean break. But he was my first real relationship and it has shown me that my ideals may have been wrong.

Reality is a lot, LOT messier than that.

"You came to see me?" His eyes slightly brighten at that thought, and I am searching through my thoughts about how to explain my sudden appearance right by his classroom without sounding like a crazy person. "How are you?" He also asks me, bringing me out of my erratic thoughts.

I scoff, not in the mood to entertain small talk. "Javier..."

"Layla," he cuts me off, evidently worried about how his name had sounded more like a goodbye. "I'm sorry for everything. For what you saw, for what I did...and for attacking you like that the last time I saw you." He rubs a hand down his face and lets out a frustrated sigh. "I miss you so much," he walks forward slowly, and it is only the look of sadness on his face that keeps my feet planted where they are rather than retreating backwards.

He reaches around me to hug me and lets out a sigh of relief. I close my eyes for a moment, letting myself feel his touch one more time. It doesn't feel like it used to, it doesn't feel good anymore, but for the sake of what we were for each other before, I let him continue to hold me and feel comfort. After a couple of minutes like that, he steps away from me and continues with what he wanted to say.

"I did mean what I said though, sometimes instincts come over me and can't help myself in the moment. When it's all said and done, I end up making mistakes that I regret later. And I do regret it, Layla. I regret hurting you." His face darkens and a serious expression takes over his features while he looks me in the eyes. "I don't regret biting you though, because if I hadn't, I wouldn't have been able to keep you in my life. Atleast now, we can still have a chance."

I school my expressions, putting on my best poker face. "Are you nuts?" I ask him, causing his eyebrows to draw down and his eyes narrow in confusion. "In what reality would you think I would come back to you after everything? How could you ever respect a person who would do that? Not to mention the respect I would lose for myself too."

I cross my arms and continue to look him in the face fearlessly. The words come pouring out of my mouth, as though I had bottled it up for too long and need to get it off my chest. "I get it, that you are having a hard time with control. I really do understand that, trust me. But somewhere before that night, before I had walked in with you and that woman, YOU had agreed to be bitten by her. There was clearly intimacy before you both before that particular time that I had walked in on. I still have a lot of fond memories with you, but let's not tarnish them any further. We are both clearly too easily driven by impulses, even though our impulses are VERY different, it would be best for us to keep our distance from each other. I came here today to tell you that."

"Layla," he reaches out to me, but I quickly flinch away from his touch. Hurt crosses his features once more, but he has a moment of wisdom and maintains distance between us. "I made mistakes, Layla. I am truly sorry for that. You know how hard I worked, and when I met her, she helped me forget about it all and before I knew it I let myself go. But I realize that was just an empty distraction, it didn't mean anything."

One of my eyebrows raise in question. "Aren't you still with her, Javier?"

His lips slant into a smirk and the seriousness in his expression lightens. "Don't be jealous, baby. It's just sex, and every time I only think of you and wish it was you that was under me." He looks proud of himself at that admission, and looks to me like I should be happy about what he said. But now I just want to puke.

I pinch the bridge of my nose between my thumb and my forefinger and take a deep breathe while praying for patience to deal with this person in front of me. I try to think of something that will keep me calm, and my mind goes through memories in the garden. Of the feeling of fresh soil between my fingers. Of the sun on my face and the smell of the beautiful outdoors. The lone sunflower I found on my pillow last night appears in my mind, and I feel my pulse begin to slow down.

"The fact that you are with someone but wanting someone else just shows me that you are weak and despicable. So let me make this clear," I step closer to him and his pupils widen. "You may want me, Javier, but you can't have me," I say slowly, wanting him to hear and feel every word, hoping that it will break through his delusions. "We are through. So I hope you can do me this last favor by staying away from me and getting the help you clearly need."

His face drops and I can already see the denial coming before he opens his mouth to respond. He rushes towards me, grabbing me frantically by the shoulders. "No, Layla, wait! We can start -"

"Him again?" I hear in an amused voice behind me, immediately dissipating the anger that was rising in me and replacing it with peace. Ryker comes to stand beside me, and Javier reluctantly releases me. I look over to him but his eyes are focused on Javier. "Thank you," he tells him, confusing both of us. He suddenly launches an attack, punching him in the gut twice, and Javier bends at the waist with the force of the hits. After landing the second hit, Ryker uses his arm's momentum to swing his elbow back into Javier's face. His nose breaks with an audible crunch of bones, making me wince in involuntary sympathy.

I look over Ryker appreciatively, thankful that he stepped in when my control was about to snap. I didn't need to be saved, but I appreciate the assist since I didn't have to get my hands dirty. I lick my lips, a little more bloodthirsty than I would have predicted.

"I had been hoping you would give me a reason to do that," Ryker says over his shoulder towards Javier, leaving him groaning and rolling on the ground. The students who saw a glimpse of the show keep walking now that Ryker is here.

"Ready, love?" He asks me, and I can't help but give him a wide grin and place my hand in his.