Chapter 3

THREE

✿

i n  h a e c v e r b a

(Latin) in these words

════════

IF THAT MOMENT was a song, I would hit the replay button a thousand times, never letting it falter or dissipate in the air.

"Laurel Kirsten Dos Santos," With alcohol involved, Isaiah's spirits had elated to Neverland. He bit his lower lip, suppressing a devilish smile. I looked up from the three empty bottles beside him.

The moment he has started his impromptu speech about global warming, I knew I had to drive a drunk man home.

The sight of him was a marvel. His features highlighted in the fresh moonlight. I'm confused kung saan titingin. There were two eye catching views at that moment: the city lights that looked like they were sprinkled on the foothills. The faint freckles dusted on Isaiah's face. I see no difference.

"Alam mo, umuwi na tayo. Baka alcohol poisoning na 'yan."

"Uy! concerned siya sa 'kin." I was rewarded with a smile. "That's why I like you, Laurie."

Thankfully it was dark out. He didn't see my cheeks turn red. Confidence surged into my system — maybe because of the alcohol, my heart beating wildly as I asked the question I was scared for months to know the answer of. "Are we here as friends?"

"That's the problem. We're not official yet. Dami nating time dati, we just wasted a whole damn year." He ruffled his hair, "Law and Med school's a bitch."

"Kung pumunta tayo dito as friends, I wouldn't even dare to think about kissing you, Laurie." He pouted, a bit drunk.

"...you're thinking about what?"

Slowly, he closed the gap between us, his face was just inches away from mine. I was petrified.

I took in the specks of stardust in his eyes, hidden underneath his long eyelashes.

The world decided to play its game. As if the sleep spell dawned on him, he found his way onto my shoulder. He was motionless for a minute until I felt the heaving of his chest and his heartbeat against mine, I feared it wouldn't stop from racing.

A sigh escaped my lips. His disheveled hair tickled it to a dreamy smile as I made the most out of that ephemeral moment.

I found the universe.

════════

THE DAY AFTER I was tempted to let Ice's lips captivate mine was in total contrast with the dreamy atmosphere that night.

It poured hard. The thought of the absent kiss haunted me till the morning. I knew I should've washed it down with alcohol.

Classes were suspended — but it didn't stop our profs in sending 20 assigned Supreme Court decisions, on top of legal provisions, annotations and commentaries in preparation for the impending recits once that lifts.

I usually study at night, but since I have decided not to touch the broomstick nor wash the dirty dishes on the sink, might as well start reading something.

I splayed out all of my pastel highlighters on the breakfast counter, assembled the bookstand and managed to make double-shot espresso.

One case can take from 7 up to more than 20 pages. Considering I'm still a freshman, this is the least amount it would get.

I chose that life, not regretting it though, even when I need to endure weeks without decent sleep. My body clock's wack and Law school transformed me into a coffee slugging monster.

I listened to the pither pather against the roof. I barely look up from my codals and once in a while, getting distracted by the television.

"... Bagyong Sergio na may international name na 'Cyclone Charybdis' ang inaasahang magbabadya ng malalakas na pag-ulan sa kalakhang Luzon hanggang martes..."

A subtle knock on my door was enough to make me stand up from the kitchen stool and abandon my written digests. My was heart beating wildly against my chest.

"...signal number two, CALABARZON, NCR..."

I was surprised to see a woman in a black hoodie, her features delicate under the dull lighting of the hallway. I quickly recognize her. Relief surged into my system.

"Laurie,"

"Ate Amelia?"

Her narrow eyes sparked a hint of resemblance. "Ate Amy na lang, ang lakas kasi maka-tita ng full name ko."

She's the only girl out of the seven cousins that I have in my father's side. We somehow clicked despite our different interests and found solace in each other in times of roughness.

"What brings you here?" I asked, wondering why their visit to my condo was so sudden. It was Wednesday. Usually over the weekend sila bumibisita sa 'kin, checking on me and keeping me sane, dahil sa may Sampaloc lang naman sila nakatira.

"Inabot kami ng ulan, e." She pulled her sneakers out onto the door mat. "I have Mavi with me. Galing kami sa PTA meeting niya."

As if on cue, a kid appeared behind her. "Mavi!" His beach waves hidden under a blue cap.

Niyakap niya ako ng mahigpit and I reciprocated, suddenly forgetting about all of my impending paperworks."Tinang!"

"Pasalamat ka 'dun sa niregalong toys sa 'yo ni Tinang, bili." Ate Amelia commanded him, sinking into my soft blue sofa.

I was once again wrapped in a tight embrace. "Thank you, Tinang. You're my favorite."

"You're always welcome, Mavi."

"Ano 'to?" She asked, looking over my digests. "'Pag naging lawyer ka in the future, ikaw mag-ayos ng annulment namin ng daddy ni Mavi, ha?"

"Ate naman, matagal pa 'yon." I went over to fix my things. "I need a miracle to pass the Bar."

They were in legal separation. I couldn't imagine how difficult it would be for Mavi in the future. Knowing that your parents are building their own family with other people sucks. Firsthand, I experienced it all. My mom decided to leave for London to send me and Laurence to school, instead of dealing with my dad's mistress — but that's a long story to tell.

"Bakit naman luto-lutuan naisipan mong iregalo kay Mavi? Hindi ba pambabae lang 'yon?"

"Ate," I calmly placed a hand at the small of her back. "'Yun kasi 'yung request niya sa 'kin. Besides, it's just a toy. Tayo lang naman naglalagay ng gender labels sa kanila."

"'Yun nga, e. Pano kung..."

"Wala naman masama doon, diba? It doesn't make him any less human." I gave Mavi a peck on the cheek. Pinisil pisil ko pa 'yun. "Basta ako, love na love ko si Mavi. Let him figure things out on his own, kapag lumaki na siya."

"Boys can play with kitchen sets as to girls can play basketball. It's just playtime, ate."

"Hmmm... you seem to have a point. Your undergrad in Psychology really taught you something huh," She laughed.

"Siyempre. Ice was there during the times na wala akong maisagot sa quizzes." I shook my head. "Just kidding, ate."

"I know you wouldn't lie to yourself. Matalino ka naman, e." I couldn't help but smile.

"Weird, pero hawig ni Mavi si Ice 'nung baby pa siya. I have a picture sa wallet ko." I showed her the picture that I stole from his photo albums.

"Hay nako, humingi ka na kasi ng baby kay Ice," nakangisi niyang sabi.

What she said caught me off guard, making me choke on my espresso. "Ate!"

"Kayo kasi, may pa 'no label' pang nalalaman. Nagsasayang kayo ng oras, alam mo ba."

She doubled over in laughter. Mavi's eyebrows were knitted together, probably wondering why his mom was enjoying that so much.

"Paalis na nga 'yung tao, e." I grab some tissues to clean the mess that I made.

"Mahirap ang LDR, Laurie. Tignan mo ang nangyari sa amin ni kuya Mike mo,"

"I know, ate. I don't think I can live with that. Pero, I haven't yet tried that kind of setup kasi." I shove all of my highlighters inside my pen case. "But I won't mind na lang, basta makasama ko lang si Ice in any way possible."

The two of them stayed over till dinner time and kept me sane. We were looking over an old photo album, laughing about ate Amelia's shocking early 2000s hairstyles, when a polaroid picture slid out of the pages and onto the carpet.

It was a picture of Ice, his arm draped over my shoulder as we both smiled sheepishly. In the backdrop were small hills, obscuring the fog. It was sometime in 2007. I could tell because of the heightened youth on our faces, and the date on the lower right corner.

Underneath it was a phrase scribbled with a black sharpie.

To more places with you.

It's funny how the universe works.

════════

I VAGUELY REMEMBER the last time I made the kitchen dirty. It seemed like yesterday, my mom taught me about measurements and my all time request, the science of kimchi.

I rummaged the kitchen drawers of baking equipments. I found a teal colored bowl and some of the ingredients.

My eyes darted to the calendar on the kitchen wall. A familiar date was held captive by a red circle. It was Ice's birthday in two days.

Suddenly, my phone vibrated and lit up to a FaceTime request. Nonchalantly, I pressed accept to see Ice's face in full detail. His thick eyebrows arched.

His skin looked immaculate even under dull lighting conditions, which is a bit unfair, but the dark circles under his eyes beg to differ.

"Atty. Dos Santos," His voice cut through the ambient noise of the rain.

"Medyo busy ako, Dr. Ramirez."

He chuckled. It was cute. Iisipin ko na talaga na sumisinghot siya ng laughing gas. "Same, same. I just want to be busy with you."

From the other screen, I could see him cutting something that looks like recycled plastic bottles and gluing them into rigid bamboo sticks.

"Ano 'yan? Kailan pa nagkaroon ng arts and crafts subject sa med school?"

"Kailan pa nagkaroon ng baking lessons sa Law school?" He mocked back, laughing. I threw my deadly glare at him.

"Atty. naman, di ba pwedeng sumali sa orgs kapag med student? SJU seems to have a lot, e. I'm just doing my part before I..."

"Leave," I finished for him. My chest twinged with guilt. I couldn't even say the word without an inkling of pain in my system.

Nilapit niya 'yung ginagawa niya sa screen. "Maganda 'to kapag umiilaw na."

His laugh was met with deafening silence. The lantern parade was in two weeks, after our prelims. By that time, he's long gone. I couldn't stand the thought of him leaving. He was like my written digests, waiting for their deadline.

"Your birthday's in two days. Do you have plans?" I asked, attempting to shift the topic. I mindlessly tossed the dry ingredients into the bowl.

"Oh, yeah. About that, siyempre I'm spending it with you, somewhere. 'San mo ba gusto?"

"Ice, ikaw ang may birthday. You should be the one to decide. Besides, hindi ka ba magce-celebrate kasama sila tita?"

"My parents are busy. Always. They have other plans. They rather perform surgeries than to bake me a birthday cake." A look of longing was evident in his eyes.

"Ano bang gusto mong regalo?" I asked, attempting to cheer him up.

"Whatever that you are making. Mukhang masarap, e. I know you're good at the kitchen."

"These cupcakes are not for you, sorry." I lied. I was practicing my baking skills because it has been ages. I was also thinking of making his birthday cake and surprise him although it sounds super cheesy. Kawawa naman kasi siya.

"Ouch, my heart." Nagkunwari siyang nasasaktan. He held his hands into his chest. "Akala ko pa naman para sa 'kin."

"Bakit, special ka ba?"

"Birthday ko naman, e. Hindi ba ako special sa 'yo?" Pakikipag-talo niya.

"I invoke my rights against self-incrimination."

He laughed.

"Ice, you're having a nose bleed!"

"Huy! Easy ka lang kasi." He continued laughing. "Wala tayo sa Law school or sa courtroom ha?Talagang mano-nose bleed ako sa mga ganyang banat mo,"

"No, I'm serious. Nagdudugo 'yung ilong mo!"

"Fuck," he muttered, seeing the blood trickling out of his nose. He went out of the screen, leaving the sight of his swiveling chair. A heavy thud came from the other side of his room.

"Are you okay? Bakit parang may nahulog?" I asked when he got back.

"Sorry, I was looking for some... tissues. I'm fine." The frantic look on his face said otherwise. "Med student," tinuro niya ang sarili, "Don't worry. That was perfectly normal."

"Are you sure?" Something inside of me said it was not.

"Oh, concerned ka pala sa 'kin. Akala ko ba hindi ako special," he pouted.

"I didn't say anything like that. Bakit naman ako hindi magiging concerned sayo? Parang hindi mo na yata alam kung paano matulog,"

"Wow, nagsalita 'yung Law student na araw-araw 8 hours 'yung tulog." I seemed to have a full stock of death glares — they were all received by him.

"Anyway, I just wanted to thank you for driving me home last night. Akala ko iiwan mo na lang ako doon, e."

"I was thinking of that, alam mo ba. But I don't want to feel like I am depriving you of the comfort of your home. Pero you gave me an idea, sige next time."

"Huy! 'Wag naman po."

I flashed him my devilish smile. Siyempre hindi kita iiwan. I'd rather see you leave me, kesa ako ang umalis. Ganoon ako ka-tanga sa 'yo, Isaiah.

"When this storm subsides, I promise, we'll hit the road again. Same thing, quality time together." He playfully wiggled his eyebrows.

Another smile was formed in my lips. I couldn't wait. I kept my fingers from tapping wildly against the breakfast counter.

I knew he was the comfort after the chaos.

He's also the rainbow after the rain.

════════

to be continued...

════════