The Reprimand

"You did what?!" Moira screeched in a panic, supported by her dipping her fingers frantically into a bowl of warm water, soap and baby oil. She insisted that if she did that for long enough, her acrylics would come off. I insisted that the lifehack videos she watched on social media were full of shit.

"Of all the stupid things ye've done, this is by far the WORST!" Connor, my possible husband-to-be, was red in the face, like he was having an allergic reaction to fire ants. His accent tripled in thickness to the point where he would just be yelling at me in Gaelic soon. "Henri tell her she's stupid!"

"Yeah go ahead Henri," I turned to my butler with a strained eyebrow. "Tell the woman who writes your checks that she's stupid."

Henri looked like he was biting his tongue for a moment before he turned to my friends with a constipated expression. "I'll sit this one out."

"That's what I thought."