Chapter 5

Early Friday morning, Jim drove her out to the airport. Leigh checked in with the person at the counter and was walked out to where a tiny airplane sat on the runway. There were only two seats besides the one for the pilot. The old Cree woman from the coffee shop sat in the other seat. She nodded at Leigh.

"You are the new teacher," she said, "Anna likes you."

"Anna is doing very well," Leigh said. "She's quiet, but she is gaining confidence."

"That is good." The old woman looked out the window of the plane. "It is a different world. She needs to live in your world, not mine."

"I'm sure there are parts of your world she will need."

The old woman smiled, but didn't say anything.

The pilot climbed in and made sure that they were buckled in properly.

"Sorry, but there is no inflight movie today." He grinned at them then turned to his work.

Leigh had never flown in such a small airplane before. She found it a fascinating experience. The green of the spruce forest suddenly gave way to farmland then they were landing in Winnipeg.

"I'll be here at four," the pilot said, "Have a good day." He helped the old woman out of the plane, watched to make sure Leigh didn't fall then walked away toward the terminal.

A young man met the Cree woman and they started talking in Cree. Leigh waved at them and went to find a taxi.

Seeing Dr. Heath was like catching up with an old friend. She told him about her new job and how different it was up north. She even talked about how Mr. Ryckle made her anxious. In the end, he wrote her the same prescription she'd before. He gave her enough for six months.

"That should keep you until you see Dr. Hallace in Thompson," he said, "He's a good doctor. I can send him your file if you'd like. Just get the receptionist to give you the proper forms."

Leigh was walking out of the Winnipeg Psychiatric Center when she saw a big black truck parked across the road. She didn't think anything of it until she saw Jack leaning against the truck. He waved, and Leigh reluctantly walked over to him.

"The girl's races have been moved up," Jack said, "I thought I'd just come over and fetch you. It would be a pity for you to miss them, seeing as you don't have much time"

"How did you find me?" Leigh reluctantly climbed into the truck.

"Spruce Bay is a small town," Jack said, "There are no secrets."

He wove through traffic and chatted about how excited the young people were to be in Winnipeg. Leigh forced herself to relax. He must mean well, just a little enthusiastic.

The two girls and the one young man were ecstatic that Leigh was there. The young man, George, was running in the junior race, almost three kilometers. George was one of those young people who struggled to find their place in the world. Not disabled enough to be in the Special Olympics, but couldn't keep up with the girl's rapid-fire conversation. He tried to laugh at the right times, but he was just a beat off. The girls didn't care. This was their first trip to Winnipeg and they talked nonstop about shopping and fast food.

They both did well in their five-kilometer race, and Leigh almost wished that she could stay to watch George run later.

She had the taxi stop on the way to the airport to pick up a treat at her favourite little sushi shop. She got enough for Jim as well. She could tease him about eating sushi for Thanksgiving Dinner.

Back at the airport she found her way to the door she came in on the way down. The pilot sat reading a book.

"Our other passenger isn't coming back with us," he said as he put the book in his pocket. "If you're ready we can get going."

Even though they had barely exchanged a word on the way down, Leigh missed the old woman's presence in the plane. She tried to put her worries about seeing Jack outside the psychiatric center out of her mind, but he had looked like he was waiting for her. It didn't matter what her head told her, her stomach worried about it.

Jim came and got her at the airport and she went straight to the pharmacy to drop off the prescription. The pharmacist gave her a long look when he saw the list of medications, but didn't say anything but that they would be ready Saturday morning.

Leigh went to the pharmacy first thing in the morning. There was a line up at the counter so she wandered through the store while she waited. When it was her turn, the pharmacist handed her the bag with all the slips stapled to the outside.

"This is a very powerful cocktail of medications," he said, "I am assuming you have been on them before given the dosages, but I've printed up the information sheets anyway because it doesn't hurt to be reminded."

"Thank you," Leigh said. She wrapped the pages around the bag of medication and headed to the counter to pay the balance on the prescription. She had to put everything down on the counter to dig out her debit card. As she punched in her PIN she heard Jack behind her talking to a woman Leigh recognized as one of the high school teachers. She was glad that the information sheets were face down. She turned the bag so the labels were facing away from him. He didn't appear to notice her as she scooped up her medications and headed out of the mall.

The weather had turned cold again and snow was drifting through the air. Leigh pulled her toque down and turned her collar up. She should have dressed warmer, but had been too eager to pick up her meds and get back on her routine. Normally she would have filled her pill cases yesterday.

With her collar up, she didn't see who ran into her and knocked her to the ground. Pain shot through her arm as she tried to catch herself. By the time she got up whoever it was had gone.

So had all the medication that she had just picked up from the pharmacy.

Leigh turned and trudged back to the pharmacy.

"Someone stole my medications," she said to the pharmacist.

"You need to report it to the police," the pharmacist said.

"I know, my husband is a police officer, but I need my medications in the meantime."

"I'm sorry, but I can't do that," the pharmacist said, "Even if your plan would allow you to refill them immediately, I can't just give you more drugs. Get the police to let me know that they've investigated the theft and I may be able to refill the prescriptions."

"Please, it is really important to my health that I have those medications."

"I understand that, but I could lose my license." The pharmacist shook his head. "Get someone from the police to call me and I will do what I can."

She was walking to the police station when Jack stepped up beside her.

"Let's go for a ride," he said, "We need to talk."

"I have to go talk to the police."

"You might want to rethink that," Jack said, "It would be too bad if Mr. Ryckle learned they had hired a psycho to teach Grade Three. I told you, there are no secrets in a small town."

Leigh stared at him.

"I could make plenty of trouble for you, Leigh." He shrugged and looked up into the rafters of the mall. "Or I could make life a lot easier for you. It's your choice."

Leigh followed him to his truck. A huge weight descended on her. She clenched her fists to keep from crying.

"That's better," Jack put the truck in gear. "I don't need to tell you I have my sources of information. If you think of telling that husband of yours of our little deal, I can make your life, and his, hell. The Mounties don't have much sympathy for members who let their spouses deal drugs on the side."

"I don't deal drugs," Leigh said.

"They don't know that," Jack said, "If your medication starts showing up all over the town, I'm sure they could be convinced."

"You know who stole my prescriptions."

"Of course I do, Leigh. I know everything about everybody in this dump."

"What do you want?"

"For now, we'll just say that you owe me a favour. Just don't say anything about your medication." Jack pulled up in front of Leigh's home. "After that, I'll let you know."

Leigh climbed out of the truck and walked into the house. She left the house dark and sat at the kitchen table thinking hard. She didn't want to be a danger to Jim. He was new in the town. Who knows what strings Jack could pull? She took a deep breath. She would have to be strong for Jim, just like he was always strong for her. Until she knew more about what Jack wanted, she wasn't going to say anything to anyone. She halved her doses and hoped they would still work. Even then she was only buying a few days' grace.

Leigh got up and put the lights on and started getting dinner ready for Jim. She needed to be thankful for his strength. She'd wanted to invite Fran to Thanksgiving Dinner, but the Fran was visiting friends for the long weekend. Leaving just Leigh and Jim. Fortunately, Jim had to work much of the weekend so she didn't need to pretend everything was fine. She would get herself together for him by Monday. She'd think of something.

Tuesday morning, Leigh got up in the morning and taught her class. She was all right. She was all right Wednesday and Thursday too. Maybe Dr. Diat was right and she didn't need all those powerful drugs to keep her sane.

She didn't talk to Jack at all, but his black truck seemed to be everywhere. He would smile and wave at her every time he saw her.

"I don't understand it," Dr. Kwali said while she sat with Leigh in the coffee shop Friday afternoon. "A young man came in after overdosing on a anti-psychotic drug. Someone sold him the pills, telling him that he would get a great high from them. It is bad how people abuse medicine that is supposed to make them well. I saw it in the city; it isn't much different here. But sad, very sad."

Leigh's hand stopped for a second before she lifted her cup the rest of the way to her mouth.

"Is he going to be OK?"

"It depends on what you mean by OK," Dr. Kwali said, "He'll live, but he may have permanently changed his brain chemistry, only time will tell."

A whisper chuckled in her head. She pushed it away and took another sip of coffee. She'd be all right. She had to be. The old Cree woman had returned to her table. Leigh waved at her, but there were people with her, so she didn't go to talk. She was curious about what the old woman could tell her about Anna.

Leigh was fine through the weekend, but on Monday morning she had to fight her way through a fog to get to class. Hearing the students through the noise in her head was a struggle. She had to work harder - too late now to say anything to Jim. Jack would convince everyone that she'd sold her prescription to that poor young man. Jim would lose his job.

The weather didn't help either. Snow fell from grey skies every day. She put the traction aids on her boots to walk to and from school. Strange to feel gratitude toward the person who forced her to ruin her life, but she didn't know what she would do without the spikes on her boots. Leigh walked everywhere. Living in Winnipeg, she'd never thought it necessary to get her driver's license or a car. Maybe she should get Jim to teach her how to drive. The voices whispered their approval and she shuddered. She didn't like things that made the voices happy.

Leigh was convinced people watched her constantly. When she got up in the night to look outside, there were prints in the snow in her yard. The voices in her head got louder. She could no longer be sure whether real noises woke her up, or the sounds in her head.

She didn't know whether the footprints in the snow were real either. It snowed so much that they were gone by morning.

Jack wandered into the elementary staff room one morning.

"It is almost time for the Halloween Dance," he said, "Volunteer to be a chaperone."

"I don't like loud music." Leigh clutched the counter to keep her from losing her balance. "The bass makes me ill."

"I don't care what you like." Jack leaned into her space. "I want you at that dance, unless you want another incident with an overdose on your meds. I could have someone swear that you offered them some drugs."

"You bastard!" Leigh said.

"Mrs. Dalrymple," Mr. Ryckle said from the doorway, "I will not tolerate that kind of language in this school." He frowned at them. "If you have a problem, deal with it on your own time."

Leigh felt the heat rush into her face, but she walked out of the room and back to her class without looking at Mr. Ryckle. At lunch, she signed up to supervise the Halloween Dance.

The dance was Friday night. Jack stopped beside her on the road Thursday night.

"George will come to you to get into the dance. You'll let him in without making him go through the security check. No problem. I don't even care if you stay the night, but it would look strange if you leave right away."

Leigh put herself at the door checking in students. A couple of police officers were checking the young people for booze or drugs. Some students laughed and joked with the RCMP others glared at them suspiciously.

George waved at her from out in the parking lot. She went out to talk to him.

"Jack said you were getting me in." He looked like he could have been Tom's older brother. Leigh didn't know if Tom had any brothers. His stories were all about him and his dad. She didn't like thinking about someone like Jack getting his clutches on Tom or Steve, or any of the kids in her class.

"Go to the primary entrance and wait," Leigh pointed toward the door. She went back to checking tickets for a bit, then excused herself to go to the washroom. Once out of sight she headed for the primary wing and let the George in.

"It's fucking cold out there," George shook himself.

"Tough." Leigh thought he was going to argue with her, but he strolled away. Leigh went back to the front.

As soon as the music started she knew it was going to be torture. Even out in the hall helping with snacks, the thumping bass fed the voices. She rubbed her temples; the pressure helped for a little while.

"You look terrible," the other teacher on snack duty said, "I can handle it from here. You go home and get some rest."

"Thanks," Leigh said. She threw her coat on and put the traction aids on her boots. The cold night air helped to clear her head a little, but even away from the school she still heard the thumping of the base. The screeching in her head rapidly worsened. It didn't matter how hard she pushed on her head they wouldn't stop.

She began banging her head.

Stop, stop, stop, I can't take this anymore!

"Look at the crazy woman!" a crowd of teens surrounded her. They'd come out of nowhere - now they were laughing and pushing at her. "She's nuts! Completely off her head."

"Isn't she the Grade Three teacher?" one of them said, "Maybe she's high on something. If I was a teacher, I'd be high all the time." His laughter sounded like the voices in her head.

"Stop it!" she screamed at them, but they just laughed more. They danced around her and made faces at her. Leigh couldn't understand them. The voices in her head joined the taunting. She needed pressure, needed to hold them in or they would escape. The doctors had told her a hole wouldn't work. Leigh banged her head some more.

"She's really messed up."

"Cool, let's help her." One of the teens slapped her. When she turned away from him a girl on her other side punched her. Leigh couldn't tell any more what was inside and what was outside her head.

The front of a house near them was decorated for Halloween; complete with an axe stuck in a stump next to a pumpkin head on the ground. Leigh screamed and grabbed the axe. She might have heard a voice shouting from the house, but didn't care. Her tormentors and the voices in her head bled into one. The teens laughed and ran away, and she chased after them into the trails.

As soon as went under the trees, the dim light from the street vanished. Red flickered at the edges of her vision, but cast no light and vanished if she looked toward it.

Leigh followed the sound of laughing, but couldn't catch up to them. Just as she reached a small clearing, her foot caught on a root and she fell to the ground. She shouted incoherently as the voices in her head poured out of her mouth.

All the darkness inside her was free.

The world was going to suffer, but she didn't care anymore. She hoped that she died before it ended. Boots kicked at her, so she let go of the ax and curled up in a ball. Screams became whimpers. Hands pulled at her, but she curled tighter.

"That's enough," someone said, "It may be useful to keep her alive." Her tormentors stepped away from her. She couldn't see any faces, just shapes in the darkness. One shape stepped closer to her - black from head to toe without any face but a deer skull stitched on their mask.

"Too bad," the figure in black said. "I almost liked her." It faded away and left Leigh alone in the dark.